every day to see in our own wars many thousands of men of other nations；
for money to stake their blood and their lives in quarrels wherein they
have no manner of concern。
CHAPTER XXIV
OF THE ROMAN GRANDEUR
I will only say a word or two of this infinite argument； to show the
simplicity of those who compare the pitiful greatness of these times with
that of Rome。 In the seventh book of Cicero's Familiar Epistles （and let
the grammarians put out that surname of familiar if they please； for in
truth it is not very suitable； and they who； instead of familiar； have
substituted 〃ad Familiares；〃 may gather something to justify them for so
doing out of what Suetonius says in the Life of Caesar； that there was a
volume of letters of his 〃ad Familiares 〃） there is one directed to
Caesar； then in Gaul； wherein Cicero repeats these words； which were in
the end of another letter that Caesar had written to him： 〃As to what
concerns Marcus Furius； whom you have recommended to me； I will make him
king of Gaul； and if you would have me advance any other friend of yours
send him to me。〃 It was no new thing for a simple citizen of Rome； as
Caesar then was； to dispose of kingdoms； for he took away that of King
Deiotarus from him to give it to a gentleman of the city of Pergamus；
called Mithridates； and they who wrote his Life record several cities
sold by him； and Suetonius says； that he had once from King Ptolemy three
millions and six hundred thousand crowns； which was very like selling him
his own kingdom：
〃Tot Galatae； tot Pontus； tot Lydia； nummis。〃
＇〃So much for Galatia； so much for Pontus；
so much for Lydia。〃Claudius in Eutrop。； i。 203。＇
Marcus Antonius said； that the greatness of the people of Rome was not
so much seen in what they took； as in what they gave； and； indeed； some
ages before Antonius； they had dethroned one amongst the rest with so
wonderful authority； that in all the Roman history I have not observed
anything that more denotes the height of their power。 Antiochus
possessed all Egypt； and was； moreover； ready to conquer Cyprus and other
appendages of that empire： when being upon the progress of his victories；
C。 Popilius came to him from the Senate； and at their first meeting
refused to take him by the hand； till he had first read his letters；
which after the king had read； and told him he would consider of them；
Popilius made a circle about him with his cane； saying：〃Return me an
answer； that I may carry it back to the Senate； before thou stirrest out
of this circle。〃 Antiochus； astonished at the roughness of so positive
a command； after a little pause； replied； 〃I will obey the Senate's
command。〃 Then Popilius saluted him as friend of the Roman people。
To have renounced claim to so great a monarchy； and a course of such
successful fortune； from the effects of three lines in writing！ Truly
he had reason； as he afterwards did； to send the Senate word by his
ambassadors； that he had received their order with the same respect as if
it had come from the immortal gods。
All the kingdoms that Augustus gained by the right of war； he either
restored to those who had lost them or presented them to strangers。 And
Tacitus； in reference to this； speaking of Cogidunus； king of England；
gives us； by a marvellous touch； an instance of that infinite power： the
Romans； says he； were from all antiquity accustomed to leave the kings
they had subdued in possession of their kingdoms under their authority
〃Ut haberent instruments servitutis et reges。〃
＇〃That they might have even kings to be their slaves。〃
Livy； xlv。 13。＇
'Tis probable that Solyman； whom we have seen make a gift of Hungary and
other principalities； had therein more respect to this consideration than
to that he was wont to allege； viz。； that he was glutted and overcharged
with so many monarchies and so much dominion； as his own valour and that
of his ancestors had acquired。
CHAPTER XXV
NOT TO COUNTERFEIT BEING SICK
There is an epigram in Martial； and one of the very good onesfor he has
of all sortswhere he pleasantly tells the story of Caelius； who； to
avoid making his court to some great men of Rome； to wait their rising；
and to attend them abroad； pretended to have the gout； and the better to
colour this anointed his legs； and had them lapped up in a great many
swathings； and perfectly counterfeited both the gesture and countenance
of a gouty person； till in the end； Fortune did him the kindness to make
him one indeed：
〃Quantum curs potest et ars doloris
Desiit fingere Caelius podagram。〃
＇〃How great is the power of counterfeiting pain： Caelius has ceased
to feign the gout； he has got it。〃Martial； Ep。； vii。 39； 8。＇
I think I have read somewhere in Appian a story like this； of one who to
escape the proscriptions of the triumvirs of Rome； and the better to be
concealed from the discovery of those who pursued him； having hidden
himself in a disguise； would yet add this invention； to counterfeit
having but one eye； but when he came to have a little more liberty； and
went to take off the plaster he had a great while worn over his eye； he
found he had totally lost the sight of it indeed； and that it was
absolutely gone。 'Tis possible that the action of sight was dulled from
having been so long without exercise； and that the optic power was wholly
retired into the other eye： for we evidently perceive that the eye we
keep shut sends some part of its virtue to its fellow； so that it will
swell and grow bigger； and so inaction； with the heat of ligatures and；
plasters； might very well have brought some gouty humour upon the
counterfeiter in Martial。
Reading in Froissart the vow of a troop of young English gentlemen； to
keep their left eyes bound up till they had arrived in France and
performed some notable exploit upon us； I have often been tickled with
this thought； that it might have befallen them as it did those others；
and they might have returned with but an eye a…piece to their mistresses；
for whose sakes they had made this ridiculous vow。
Mothers have reason to rebuke their children when they counterfeit having
but one eye； squinting； lameness； or any other personal defect； for；
besides that their bodies being then so tender； may be subject to take an
ill bent； fortune； I know not how； sometimes seems to delight in taking
us at our word； and I have heard several examples related of people who
have become really sick； by only feigning to be so。 I have always used；
whether on horseback or on foot； to carry a stick in my hand； and even to
affect doing it with an elegant air； many have threatened that this fancy
would one day be turned into necessity： if so； I should be the first of
my family to have the gout。
But let us a little lengthen this chapter； and add another anecdote
concerning blindness。 Pliny reports of one who； dreaming he was blind；
found himself so indeed in the morning without any preceding infirmity in
his eyes。 The force of imagination might assist in this case； as I have
said elsewhere； and Pliny seems to be of the same opinion； but it is more
likely that the motions which the body felt within； of which physicians；
if they please； may find out the cause； taking away his sight； were the
occasion of his dream。
Let us add another story； not very improper for this subject； which
Seneca relates in one of his epistles： 〃You know；〃 says he； writing to
Lucilius； 〃that Harpaste； my wife's fool； is thrown upon me as an
hereditary charge； for I have naturally an aversion to those monsters；
and if I have a mind to laugh at a fool； I need not seek him far； I can
laugh at myself。 This fool has suddenly lost her sight： I tell you a
strange； but a very true thing she is not sensible that she is blind； but
eternally importunes her keeper to take her abroad； because she says the
house is dark。 That what we laugh at in her； I pray you to believe；
happens to every one of us： no one knows himself to be avaricious or
grasping； and； again； the blind call for a guide； while we stray of our
own accord。 I am not ambitious； we say； but a man cannot live otherwise
at Rome； I am not wasteful； but the city requires a great outlay； 'tis
not my fault if I am cholericif I have not yet established any certain
course of life： 'tis the fault of youth。 Let us not seek our disease out
of ourselves； 'tis in us； and planted in our bowels； and the mere fact
that we do not perceive ourselves to be sick； renders us more hard to be
cured。 If we do not betimes begin to see to ourselves； when shall we
have provided for so many wounds and evils wherewith we abound？ And yet
we have a most sweet and charming medicine in philosophy； for of all the
rest we are sensible of no pleasure till after the cure： this pleases and
heals at once。〃 This is what Seneca says； that has carried me from my
subject； but there is advantage in the change。
CHAPTER XXVI
OF THUMBS
Tacitus reports； that amongst certain barbarian kings their manner was；
when they would make a firm obligation； to join their right hands close
to one another； and intertwist their thumbs； and when； by force of
straining the blood； it appeared in the ends； they lightly pricked them
with some sharp instrument； and mutually sucked them。
Physicians say that the thumbs are the master fingers of the hand； and
that their Latin etymology is derived from 〃pollere。〃 The Greeks called
them 'Avtixeip'； as who should say； another hand。 And it seems that the
Latins also sometimes take it in this sense for the whole hand：
〃Sed nec vocibus excitata blandis；
Molli pollici nec rogata； surgit。〃
＇〃Neither to be excited by soft words or by the thumb。〃
Mart。； xii。 98； 8。＇
It was at Rome a signification of favour to depress and turn in the
thumbs：
〃Fautor utroque tuum laudabit pollice ludum：〃
＇〃Thy patron will applaud thy sport with both thumbs〃
Horace。＇
and of disfavour to elevate and thrust them outward：
〃Converso pollice vulgi；
Quemlibet