the aspern papers- 第11部分

〃That's　exactly　what　I　want　to　know。　　If　she　wants　to　keep

him　to　herself　she　might　have　sent　for　me　to　tell　me　so。〃



〃She　won't　speak　of　him；〃　said　Miss　Tita。　　Then　as　she　opened　the　door

she　added　in　a　lower　tone；　〃I　have　told　her　nothing。〃



The　old　woman　was　sitting　in　the　same　place　in　which　I　had　seen　her　last；

in　the　same　position；　with　the　same　mystifying　bandage　over　her　eyes。

her　welcome　was　to　turn　her　almost　invisible　face　to　me　and　show　me

that　while　she　sat　silent　she　saw　me　clearly。　　I　made　no　motion　to　shake

hands　with　her；　I　felt　too　well　on　this　occasion　that　that　was　out

of　place　forever。　　It　had　been　sufficiently　enjoined　upon　me　that　she

was　too　sacred　for　that　sort　of　reciprocitytoo　venerable　to　touch。

There　was　something　so　grim　in　her　aspect　（it　was　partly　the　accident

of　her　green　shade）；　as　I　stood　there　to　be　measured；　that　I　ceased

on　the　spot　to　feel　any　doubt　as　to　her　knowing　my　secret；　though　I　did

not　in　the　least　suspect　that　Miss　Tita　had　not　just　spoken　the　truth。

She　had　not　betrayed　me；　but　the　old　woman's　brooding　instinct　had

served　her；　she　had　turned　me　over　and　over　in　the　long；　still　hours；

and　she　had　guessed。　　The　worst　of　it　was　that　she　looked　terribly

like　an　old　woman　who　at　a　pinch　would　burn　her　papers。　　Miss　Tita　pushed

a　chair　forward；　saying　to　me；　〃This　will　be　a　good　place　for　you　to　sit。〃

As　I　took　possession　of　it　I　asked　after　Miss　Bordereau's　health；

expressed　the　hope　that　in　spite　of　the　very　hot　weather　it　was　satisfactory。

She　replied　that　it　was　good　enoughgood　enough；　that　it　was　a　great

thing　to　be　alive。



〃Oh；　as　to　that；　it　depends　upon　what　you　compare　it　with！〃

I　exclaimed；　laughing。



〃I　don't　compareI　don't　compare。　　If　I　did　that　I　should　have　given

everything　up　long　ago。〃



I　liked　to　think　that　this　was　a　subtle　allusion　to　the　rapture

she　had　known　in　the　society　of　Jeffrey　Aspernthough　it

was　true　that　such　an　allusion　would　have　accorded　ill　with

the　wish　I　imputed　to　her　to　keep　him　buried　in　her　soul。

What　it　accorded　with　was　my　constant　conviction　that　no　human

being　had　ever　had　a　more　delightful　social　gift　than　his；

and　what　it　seemed　to　convey　was　that　nothing　in　the　world

was　worth　speaking　of　if　one　pretended　to　speak　of　that。

But　one　did　not！　　Miss　Tita　sat　down　beside　her　aunt；

looking　as　if　she　had　reason　to　believe　some　very　remarkable

conversation　would　come　off　between　us。



〃It's　about　the　beautiful　flowers；〃　said　the　old　lady；

〃you　sent　us　so　manyI　ought　to　have　thanked　you　for　them　before。

But　I　don't　write　letters　and　I　receive　only　at　long　intervals。〃



She　had　not　thanked　me　while　the　flowers　continued　to　come；　but　she

departed　from　her　custom　so　far　as　to　send　for　me　as　soon　as　she

began　to　fear　that　they　would　not　come　any　more。　　I　noted　this；

I　remembered　what　an　acquisitive　propensity　she　had　shown　when　it

was　a　question　of　extracting　gold　from　me；　and　I　privately　rejoiced

at　the　happy　thought　I　had　had　in　suspending　my　tribute。　　She　had

missed　it　and　she　was　willing　to　make　a　concession　to　bring　it　back。

At　the　first　sign　of　this　concession　I　could　only　go　to　meet　her。

〃I　am　afraid　you　have　not　had　many；　of　late；　but　they　shall　begin

again　immediatelytomorrow；　tonight。〃



〃Oh；　do　send　us　some　tonight！〃　　Miss　Tita　cried；　as　if　it

were　an　immense　circumstance。



〃What　else　should　you　do　with　them？　　It　isn't　a　manly　taste　to　make　a　bower

of　your　room；〃　the　old　woman　remarked。



〃I　don't　make　a　bower　of　my　room；　but　I　am　exceedingly　fond　of　growing

flowers；　of　watching　their　ways。　　There　is　nothing　unmanly　in　that：

it　has　been　the　amusement　of　philosophers；　of　statesmen　in　retirement；

even　I　think　of　great　captains。〃



〃I　suppose　you　know　you　can　sell　themthose　you　don't　use；〃

Miss　Bordereau　went　on。　　〃I　daresay　they　wouldn't　give　you

much　for　them；　still；　you　could　make　a　bargain。〃



〃Oh；　I　have　never　made　a　bargain；　as　you　ought　to　know。

My　gardener　disposes　of　them　and　I　ask　no　questions。〃



〃I　would　ask　a　few；　I　can　promise　you！〃　said　Miss　Bordereau；

and　it　was　the　first　time　I　had　heard　her　laugh。

I　could　not　get　used　to　the　idea　that　this　vision　of　pecuniary

profit　was　what　drew　out　the　divine　Juliana　most。



〃Come　into　the　garden　yourself　and　pick　them；　come　as　often

as　you　like；　come　every　day。　　They　are　all　for　you；〃

I　pursued；　addressing　Miss　Tita　and　carrying　off　this

veracious　statement　by　treating　it　as　an　innocent　joke。

〃I　can't　imagine　why　she　doesn't　come　down；〃　I　added；

for　Miss　Bordereau's　benefit。



〃You　must　make　her　come；　you　must　come　up　and　fetch　her；〃

said　the　old　woman；　to　my　stupefaction。　　〃That　odd　thing　you

have　made　in　the　corner　would　be　a　capital　place　for　her　to　sit。〃



The　allusion　to　my　arbor　was　irreverent；　it　confirmed　the　impression　I

had　already　received　that　there　was　a　flicker　of　impertinence　in　Miss

Bordereau's　talk；　a　strange　mocking　lambency　which　must　have　been　a　part

of　her　adventurous　youth　and　which　had　outlived　passions　and　faculties。

Nonetheless　I　asked；　〃Wouldn't　it　be　possible　for　you　to　come　down

there　yourself？　　Wouldn't　it　do　you　good　to　sit　there　in　the　shade；

in　the　sweet　air？〃



〃Oh；　sir；　when　I　move　out　of　this　it　won't　be　to　sit　in　the　air；

and　I'm　afraid　that　any　that　may　be　stirring　around　me　won't

be　particularly　sweet！　　It　will　be　a　very　dark　shade　indeed。

But　that　won't　be　just　yet；〃　Miss　Bordereau　continued　cannily；

as　if　to　correct　any　hopes　that　this　courageous　allusion　to

the　last　receptacle　of　her　mortality　might　lead　me　to　entertain。

〃I　have　sat　here　many　a　day　and　I　have　had　enough　of　arbors　in　my　time。

But　I'm　not　afraid　to　wait　till　I'm　called。〃



Miss　Tita　had　expected　some　interesting　talk；　but　perhaps　she

found　it　less　genial　on　her　aunt's　side　（considering　that　I

had　been　sent　for　with　a　civil　intention）　than　she　had　hoped。

As　if　to　give　the　conversation　a　turn　that　would　put

our　companion　in　a　light　more　favorable　she　said　to　me；

〃Didn't　I　tell　you　the　other　night　that　she　had　sent　me　out？

You　see　that　I　can　do　what　I　like！〃



〃Do　you　pity　herdo　you　teach　her　to　pity　herself？〃

Miss　Bordereau　demanded　before　I　had　time　to　answer　this　appeal。

〃She　has　a　much　easier　life　than　I　had　when　I　was　her　age。〃



〃You　must　remember　that　it　has　been　quite　open　to　me　to　think

you　rather　inhuman。〃



〃Inhuman？　　That's　what　the　poets　used　to　call　the　women　a　hundred　years　ago。

Don't　try　that；　you　won't　do　as　well　as　they！〃　　Juliana　declared。

〃There　is　no　more　poetry　in　the　worldthat　I　know　of　at　least。

But　I　won't　bandy　words　with　you；〃　she　pursued；　and　I　well　remember

the　old…fashioned；　artificial　sound　she　gave　to　the　speech。

〃You　have　made　me　talk；　talk！　　It　isn't　good　for　me　at　all。〃

I　got　up　at　this　and　told　her　I　would　take　no　more　of　her　time；　but　she

detained　me　to　ask；　〃Do　you　remember；　the　day　I　saw　you　about　the　rooms；

that　you　offered　us　the　use　of　your　gondola？〃　　And　when　I　assented；

promptly；　struck　again　with　her　disposition　to　make　a　〃good　thing〃

of　being　there　and　wondering　what　she　now　had　in　her　eye；　she　broke　out；

〃Why　don't　you　take　that　girl　out　in　it　and　show　her　the　place？〃



〃Oh；　dear　Aunt；　what　do　you　want　to　do　with　me？〃　cried　the　〃girl〃

with　a　piteous　quaver。　　〃I　know　all　about　the　place！〃



〃Well　then；　go　with　him　as　a　cicerone！〃　said　Miss　Bordereau

with　an　effort　of　something　like　cruelty　in　her　implacable

power　of　retortan　incongruous　suggestion　that　she　was

a　sarcastic；　profane；　cynical　old　woman。　　〃Haven't　we　heard

that　there　have　been　all　sorts　of　changes　in　all　these　years？

You　ought　to　see　them　and　at　your　age　（I　don't　mean　because

you're　so　young）　you　ought　to　take　the　chances　that　come。

You're　old　enough；　my　dear；　and　this　gentleman　won't　hurt　you。

He　will　show　you　the　famous　sunsets；　if　they　still　go

onDO　they　go　on？　　The　sun　set　for　me　so　long　ago。

But　that's　not　a　reason。　　Besides；　I　shall　never　miss　you；

you　think　you　are　too　important。　　Take　her　to　the　Piazza；

it　used　to　be　very　pretty；〃　Miss　Bordereau　continued；　addressing

herself　to　me。　　〃What　have　they　done　with　the　funny　old　church？

I　hope　it　hasn't　tumbled　down。　　let　her　look　at　the　shops；

she　may　take　some　money；　she　may　buy　what　she　likes。〃



Poor　Miss　Tita　had　got　up；　discountenanced　and　helpless；　and　as　we　stood

there　before　her　aunt　it　would　certainly　have　seemed　to　a　spectator

of　the　scene　that　the　old　woman　was　amusing　herself　at　our　expense。

Miss　Tita　protested；　in　a　confusion　of　exclamations　and　murmurs；

but　I　lost　no　time　in　saying　that　if　she　would　do　me　the　honor　to　accept

the　hospitality　of　my　boat　I　would　engage　that　she　should　not　be　bored。

Or　if　she　did　not　want　so　much　of　my　company　the　boat　itself；

with　the　gondolier；　was　at　her　service；　he　was　a　capital　oar

and　she　might　have　every　confidence。　　Miss　Tita；　without　definitely

answering　this　speech；　looked　away　from　me；　out　of　the　window；

as　if　she　were　going　to　cry；　and　I　remarked　that　once　we　had　Miss

Bordereau's　approval　we　could　easily　come　to　an　understanding。

We　would　take　an　hour；　whichever　she　liked；　one　of　the　very　next　days。

As　I　made　my　obeisance　to　the　old　lady　I　asked　her　if　she　would

kindly　permit　me　to　see　her　again。



For　a　moment　she　said　nothing；　then　she　inquired；　〃Is　it　very　necessary

to　your　happiness？〃



〃It　diverts　me　more　than　I　can　say。〃



〃You　are　wonderfully　civil。　　Don't　you　know　it　almost　kills　ME？〃



〃How　can　I　believe　that　when　I　see　you　more　animated；　more　brilliant

than　when　I　came　in？〃



〃That　is　very　true；　Aunt；〃　said　Miss　Tita。　　I　think　it　does　you　good。〃



〃Isn't　it　touching；　the　solicitude　we　each　have　that

the　other　shall　enjoy　herself？〃　sneered　Miss　Bordereau。

〃If　you　think　me　brilliant　today　you　don't　know　what　you

are　talking　about；　you　have　never　seen　an　agreeable　woman。

Don't　try　to　pay　me　a　compliment；　I　have　been　spoiled；〃　she　went