try will be at a standstill。 Then there will be sickness
in
plenty； endless lawsuits； crowded jails； interminable
confu…
sion in the Army and Navy； and； in short； general and
unex…
ampled prosperity！
All： Ulahlica！ Ulahlica！
Phantis： （aside） Baffled！
Scaphio： But an hour will come！
King： Your hour has come alreadyaway with them； and let them
wait my will！ （Scaphio and Phantis are led off in
custody。）
From this moment Government by Party is adopted； with all
its attendant blessings； and henceforward Utopia will no
longer be a Monarchy Limited； but； what is a great deal
better； a Limited Monarchy！
FINALE
Zara： There's a little group of isles beyond the wave
So tiny； you might almost wonder where it is
That nation is the bravest of the brave；
And cowards are the rarest of all rarities。
The proudest nations kneel at her command；
She terrifies all foreign…born rapscallions；
And holds the peace of Europe in her hand
With half a score invincible battalions！
Such； at least； is the tale
Which is born on the gale；
From the island which dwells in the sea。
Let us hope； for her sake
That she makes no mistake
That she's all the professes to be！
King： Oh； may we copy all her maxims wise；
And imitate her virtues and her charities；
And may we； by degrees； acclimatize
Her Parliamentary peculiarities！
By doing so； we shall in course of time；
Regenerate completely our entire land
Great Britain is the monarchy sublime；
To which some add （others do not） Ireland。
Such at least is the tale； etc。
CURTAIN。
THE YEOMEN OF THE GUARD
or
The Merryman and His Maid
Book by
W。S。 GILBERT
Music by
ARTHUR SULLIVAN
First produced at the Savoy Theatre in London； England；
on October 3； 1888。
THE YEOMEN OF THE GUARD
DRAMATIS PERSONAE
SIR RICHARD CHOLMONDELEY ＇pronounced Chum'lee＇
（Lieutenant of the Tower） Baritone
COLONEL FAIRFAX （under sentence of death） Tenor
SERGEANT MERYLL （of the Yeomen of the Guard） Bass/Baritone
LEONARD MERYLL （his son） Tenor
JACK POINT （a Strolling Jester） Light Baritone
WILFRED SHADBOLT
（Head Jailer and Assistant Tormentor） Bass/Baritone
THE HEADSMAN Non…singing
FIRST YEOMAN Baritone
SECOND YEOMAN Tenor
THIRD YEOMAN ＇optional＇ Baritone
FOURTH YEOMAN ＇optional＇ Tenor
FIRST CITIZEN Chorus
SECOND CITIZEN Chorus
ELSIE MAYNARD （a Strolling Singer） Soprano
PHOEBE MERYLL （Sergeant Meryll's Daughter） Mezzo…Soprano
DAME CARRUTHERS （Housekeeper to the Tower） Contralto
KATE （her Niece） Soprano
Chorus of YEOMEN of the Guard； GENTLEMEN； CITIZENS； etc。
SCENE： Tower Green
16th Century
ACT I
＇Scene。 Tower Green＇
＇Phoebe discovered spinning。
No。 1。 When maiden loves； she sits and sighs
（INTRODUCTION and SONG）
Phoebe
PHOEBE When maiden loves； she sits and sighs；
She wanders to and fro；
Unbidden tear…drops fill her eyes；
And to all questions she replies；
With a sad 〃Heigh…ho！〃
'Tis but a little word〃Heigh…ho！〃
So soft； 'tis scarcely heard〃Heigh…ho！〃
An idle breath
Yet life and death
May hang upon a maid's 〃Heigh…ho！〃
When maiden loves； she mopes apart；
As owl mopes on a tree；
Although she keenly feels the smart；
She cannot tell what ails her heart；
With its sad 〃Ah； me！〃
'Tis but a foolish sigh〃Ah； me！〃
Born but to droop and die〃Ah； me！〃
Yet all the sense
Of eloquence
Lies hidden in a maid's 〃Ah； me！〃
Yet all the sense
Of eloquence
Lies hidden in a maid's 〃Ah； me！〃
〃Ah； me！〃； 〃Ah； me！〃
Yet all the sense
Of eloquence
Lies hidden in a maid's 〃Ah； me！〃
＇PHOEBE weeps
＇Enter WILFRED
WILFRED Mistress Meryll！
PHOEBE ＇looking up＇ Eh！ Oh！ it's you； is it？ You may go
away；if you like。 Because I don't want you； you know。
WILFRED Haven't you anything to say to me？
PHOEBE Oh yes！ Are the birds all caged？ The wild beasts all
littered down？ All the locks； chains； bolts； and bars
in good order？ Is the Little Ease sufficiently
comfortable？ The racks； pincers； and thumbscrews all
ready for work？ Ugh！ you brute！
WILFRED These allusions to my professional duties are in
doubtful taste。 I didn't become a head…jailer because
I like head…jailing。 I didn't become an assistant…
tormentor because I like assistant…tormenting。 We
can't all be sorcerers； you know。 ＇PHOEBE is annoyed＇
Ah！ you brought that upon yourself。
PHOEBE Colonel Fairfax is not a sorcerer。 He's a man of
science and an alchemist。
WILFRED Well； whatever he is； he won't be one for long； for
he's to be beheaded to…day for dealings with the
devil。 His master nearly had him last night； when the
fire broke out in the Beauchamp ＇pronounced Bee'cham＇
Tower。
PHOEBE Oh！ how I wish he had escaped in the confusion！ But
take care； there's still time for a reply to his
petition for mercy。
WILFRED Ah！ I'm content to chance that。 This evening at half…
past seven ah！ ＇Gesture of chopping off a head。＇
PHOEBE You're a cruel monster to speak so unfeelingly of the
death of a young and handsome soldier。
WILFRED Young and handsome！ How do you know he's young and
handsome？
PHOEBE Because I've seen him every day for weeks past taking
his exercise on the Beauchamp ＇pronounced Bee'cham＇
Tower。
WILFRED Curse him！
PHOEBE There； I believe you're jealous of him； now。 Jealous
of a man I've never spoken to！ Jealous of a poor soul
who's to die in an hour！
WILFRED I am！ I'm jealous of everybody and everything。 I'm
jealous of the very words I speak to you because they
reach your ears and I mustn't go near 'em！
PHOEBE How unjust you are！ Jealous of the words you speak to
me！ Why； you know as well as I do that I don't even
like them。
WILFRED You used to like 'em。
PHOEBE I used to pretend I like them。 It was mere politeness
to comparative strangers。
＇Exit PHOEBE； with spinning wheel
WILFRED I don't believe you know what jealousy is！ I don't
believe you know how it eats into a man's heart and
disorders his digestion and turns his interior into
boiling lead。 Oh； you are a heartless jade to trifle
with the delicate organization of the human interior。
No。 1A。 When jealous torments
（OPTIONAL SONG）
Wilfred
WILFRED When jealous torments rack my soul；
My agonies I can't control；
Oh； better sit on red hot coal
Than love a heartless jade。
The red hot coal will hurt no doubt；
But red hot coals in time die out；
But jealousy you can not rout；
Its fires will never fade。
It's much less painful on the whole
To go and sit on red hot coal
'Til you're completely flayed；
Or ask a kindly friend to crack
Your wretched bones upon the rack
Than love a heartless jade；
Than love a heartless jade。
The kerchief on your neck of snow
I look on as a deadly foe；
It goeth where I dare not go
And stops there all day long。
The belt that holds you in its grasp
Is to my peace of mind a rasp；
It claspeth what I can not clasp；
Correct me if I'm wrong。
It's much less painful on the whole
To go and sit on red hot coal
'Til you're completely flay
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