uld not have married him。〃 I know no more pitiable state of mind than to love and hate the same creature。 But when the two feelings are both intense； and meet in an ardent bosom； such a man would do well to spend a day or two upon his knees； praying for grace divine。 For he who with all his soul loves and hates one woman is next door to a maniac； and is scarcely safe an hour together from suicide or even from homicide； this truth the newspapers tell us； by examples； every month； but are wonderfully little heeded； because newspapers do not； nor is it their business to； analyze and dwell upon the internal feelings of the despairing lover； whose mad and bloody act they record。 With such a tempest in his heart did Camille one day wander into the park。 And soon an irresistible attraction drew him to the side of the stream that flowed along one side of it。 He eyed it gloomily； and wherever the stagnant water indicated a deeper pool than usual he stopped； and looked； and thought； 〃How calm and peaceful you are！〃
He sat down at last by the water…side； his eyes bent on a calm； green pool。
It looked very peaceful； and it could give peace。 He thought； oh！ what a blessing； to be quit of rage； jealousy； despair； and life； all in a minute！
Yet that was a sordid death for a soldier to die； who had seen great battles。 Could he not die more nobly than that？ With this he suddenly felt in his pocket； and there sure enough fate had placed his pistols。 He had put them into this coat； and he had not worn this coat until to…day。 He had armed himself unconsciously。 〃Ah！〃 said he； 〃it is to be； all these things are preordained。〃 （This notion of fate has strengthened many a fatal resolution。） Then he had a cruel regret。 To die without a word； a parting word。 Then he thought to himself； it was best so； for perhaps he should have taken her with him。
〃Sir！ colonel！〃 uttered a solemn voice behind him。
Absorbed and strung up to desperation as he was； this voice seemed unnaturally loud； and discordant with Camille's mood； a sudden trumpet from the world of small things。
It was Picard； the notary。
〃Can you tell me where Madame Raynal is？〃
〃No。 At the chateau； I suppose。〃
〃She is not there； I inquired of the servant。 She was out。 You have not seen her； colonel？〃
〃Not I； I never see her。〃
〃Then perhaps I had better go back to the chateau and wait for her： stay； are you a friend of the family？ Colonel； suppose I were to tell you； and ask you to break it to Madame Raynal； or； better still； to the baroness； or Mademoiselle Rose。〃
〃Monsieur；〃 said Camille coldly； 〃charge me with no messages； for I cannot deliver them。 I AM GOING ANOTHER WAY。〃
〃In that case； I will go to the chateau once more； for what I have to say must be heard。〃
Picard returned to the chateau wondering at the colonel's strange manner。
Camille； for his part； wondered that any one could be so mad as to talk to him about trifles； to him； a man standing on the brink of eternity。 Poor soul； it was he who was mad and unlucky。 He should have heard what Picard had to say。 The very gentleness and solemnity of manner ought to have excited his curiosity。
He watched Picard's retiring form。 When he was out of sight； then he turned round and resumed his thoughts as if Picard had been no more than a fly that had buzzed and then gone。
〃Yes； I should have taken her with me；〃 he said。 He sat gloomy and dogged like a dangerous maniac in his cell； never moved； scarce thought for more than half an hour； but his deadly purpose grew in him。 Suddenly he started。 A lady was at the style； about a hundred yards distant。 He trembled。 It was Josephine。
She came towards him slowly； her eyes bent on the ground in a deep reverie。 She stopped about a stone's throw from him； and looked at the river long and thoughtfully； then casting her eye around； she caught sight of Camille。 He watched her grimly。 He saw her give a little start； and half turn round； but if this was an impulse to retreat； it was instantly suppressed； for the next moment she pursued her way。
Camille stood gloomy and bitter； awaiting her in silence。 He planted himself in the middle of the path； and said not a word。
She looked him all over； and her color came and went。
〃Out so far as this；〃 she said kindly； 〃and without your cap。〃
He put his hand to his head； and discovered that he was bareheaded。
〃You will catch your death of cold。 Come； let us go in and get your cap。〃
She made as if she would pass him。 He planted himself right before her。
〃No。〃
〃Camille！〃
〃Why do you shun me as if I was a viper？〃
〃I do not shun you。 I but avoid conferences that can lead to no good； it is my duty。〃
〃You are very wise； cold…hearted people can be wise。〃
〃Am I cold…hearted； Camille？〃
〃As marble。〃
She looked him in the face； the water came into her eyes； after awhile she whispered； sorrowfully； 〃Well； Camille； I am。〃
〃But with all your wisdom and all your coldness；〃 he went on to say； 〃you have made a mistake； you have driven me to madness and despair。〃
〃Heaven forbid！〃 said she。
〃Your prayer comes too late； you have done it。〃
〃Camille； let me go to the oratory； and pray for you。 You terrify me。〃
〃It is no use。 Heaven has no mercy for me。 Take my advice； stay where you are； don't hurry； for what remains of your life you gave to pass with me； do you understand that？〃
〃Ah！〃 And she turned pale。
〃Can you read my riddle？〃
She looked him in the face。 〃I can read your eyes； and I know you love me。 I think you mean to kill me。 I have heard men kill the thing they love。〃
〃Of course they do； sooner than another should have it； they kill itthey kill it。〃
〃God has not made them patient like us women。 Poor Camille！〃
〃Patience dies when hope dies。 Come； Madame Raynal； say a prayer； for you are going to die。〃
〃God bless you； Camille！〃 said the poor girl； putting her hands together in her last prayer。 At this sweet touch of affection； Camille hung his head； and sobbed。 Then suddenly lashing himself into fury； he cried；
〃You are my betrothed！ you talk of duty； but you forget your duty to me。 Are you not my betrothed this four years？ Answer me that。〃
〃Yes； Camille； I was。〃
〃Did I not suffer death a hundred times for you； to keep faith with you； you cold…blooded traitress with an angel's face？〃
〃Ah； Camille！ can you speak so bitterly to me？ Have I denied your right to kill me？ You shall never dishonor me； but you shall kill me； if it is your pleasure。 I do not resist。 Why； then； speak to me like that； must the last words I hear from your mouth be words of anger； cruel Camille？〃
〃I was wrong。 But it is so hard to kill her I love in cold blood。 I want anger as well as despair to keep me to it。 Come； turn your head away from me； and all our troubles shall end。〃
〃No； Camille； let me look at you。 Then you will be the last thing I shall see on earth。〃
At this he hesitated a moment； then； with a fierce stamp at what he thought was weakness； he levelled a pistol at her。
She put up her hands with a piteous cry； 〃Oh！ not my face； Camille！ pray do not disfigure my face。 Herekill me herein my bosommy heart that loved you well； when it was no sin to love you。〃
〃I can't shoot you。 I can't spill your blood。 The river will end all； and not disfigure your beauty； that has driven me mad； and cost you； poor wretch； your life。〃
〃Thank you； dear Camille。 The water does not frighten me as a pistol does； it will not hurt me； it will only kill me。〃
〃No； it is but a plunge； and you will be at peace forever； and so shall I。 Come； take my hand； Madame Raynal； Madame Raynal。〃
She gave him her hand with a look of infinite love。 She only said； 〃My poor mother！〃 That word did not fall to the ground。 It flashed like lightning at night across the demented lover； and lighted up his egotism （suicide； like homicide； is generally a fit of maniacal egotism）； even to his eyes blinded by fury。
〃Wretch that I am；〃 he shrieked。 〃Fly； Josephine； fly！ escape this moment； that my better angel whispers to me。 Do you hear？ begone； while it is time。〃
〃I will not leave you； Camille。〃
〃I say you shall。 Go to your mother and Rose； go to those you love； and I can pity； go to the chapel and thank Heaven for your escape。〃
〃Yes； but not without you； Camille。 I am afraid to leave you。〃
〃You have more to fear if you stay。 Well； I can't wait any longer。 Stay； then； and live； and learn from me how to love Jean Raynal。〃
He levelled the pistol at himself。
Josephine threw herself on him with a cry； and seized his arm。 With the strength excitement lent her she got the better； and all but overpowered him。 But； as usual； the man's strength lasted longer； and with a sustained effort he threw her off； then； pale and panting； raised the pistol to take his life。 This time she moved neither hand nor foot； but she palsied his rash hand with a word。
〃No； I LOVE YOU。〃
CHAPTER XIII。
There lie the dead corpses of those words on paper； but my art is powerless to tell you how they were uttered； those words； potent as a king's； for they saved a life。
They were a cry of terror and a cry of reproach and a cry of love unfathomable。
The weapon shook in his hand。 He looked at her with growing astonishment and joy； she at him fixedly and anxiously； her hands clasped in supplication。
〃As you used to love me？〃
〃More； far more。 Give me the pistol。 I love you； dearest。 I love you。〃
At these delicious words he lost all power of resistance； she saw； and her soft and supple hand stole in and closed upon his； and gently withdrew the weapon； and threw it into the water。 〃Good Camille！ now give me the other。〃
〃How do you know there is another？〃
〃I know you are not the man to kill a woman and spare yourself。 Come。〃
〃Josephine； have pity on me； do not deceive me； pray do not take this； my only friend； from me； unless you really love me。〃
〃I love you； I adore you；〃 was her reply。
She leaned her head on his shoulder； but with her hand she sought his； and even as she uttered those loving words she coaxed the weapon from his now unresisting grasp。
〃There； it is gone； you are saved from deathsaved from crime。