lavengro- 第115部分

Platitude。'



'And　I　hope　there　is　only　one；'　said　I；　'you　surely　would　not　

adduce　the　likes　and　dislikes　of　that　poor　silly　fellow　as　the　

criterions　of　the　opinions　of　any　party？'



'You　know　him；'　said　the　man　in　black；　'nay；　I　heard　you　mention　

him　in　the　public…house；　the　fellow　is　not　very　wise；　I　admit；　but　

he　has　sense　enough　to　know　that；　unless　a　Church　can　make　people　

hold　their　tongues　when　it　thinks　fit；　it　is　scarcely　deserving　the　

name　of　a　Church；　no；　I　think　that　the　fellow　is　not　such　a　very　

bad　stick；　and　that　upon　the　whole　he　is；　or　rather　was；　an　

advantageous　specimen　of　the　High　Church　English　clergy；　who；　for　

the　most　part；　so　far　from　troubling　their　heads　about　persecuting　

people；　only　think　of　securing　their　tithes；　eating　their　heavy　

dinners；　puffing　out　their　cheeks　with　importance　on　country　

justice　benches；　and　occasionally　exhibiting　their　conceited　wives；　

hoyden　daughters；　and　gawky　sons　at　country　balls；　whereas　

Platitude　…　'



'Stop；'　said　I；　'you　said　in　the　public…house　that　the　Church　of　

England　was　a　persecuting　Church；　and　here　in　the　dingle　you　have　

confessed　that　one　section　of　it　is　willing　to　grant　perfect　

freedom　to　the　exercise　of　all　religions；　and　the　other　only　thinks　

of　leading　an　easy　life。'



'Saying　a　thing　in　the　public…house　is　a　widely　different　thing　

from　saying　it　in　the　dingle；'　said　the　man　in　black；　'had　the　

Church　of　England　been　a　persecuting　Church；　it　would　not　stand　in　

the　position　in　which　it　stands　at　present；　it　might；　with　its　

opportunities；　have　spread　itself　over　the　greater　part　of　the　

world。　　I　was　about　to　observe　that；　instead　of　practising　the　

indolent　habits　of　his　High　Church　brethren；　Platitude　would　be　

working　for　his　money；　preaching　the　proper　use　of　fire　and　faggot；　

or　rather　of　the　halter　and　the　whipping…post；　encouraging　mobs　to　

attack　the　houses　of　Dissenters；　employing　spies　to　collect　the　

scandal　of　neighbourhoods；　in　order　that　he　might　use　it　for　

sacerdotal　purposes；　and；　in　fact；　endeavouring　to　turn　an　English　

parish　into　something　like　a　Jesuit　benefice　in　the　south　of　

France。'



'He　tried　that　game；'　said　I；　'and　the　parish　said　〃Pooh；　pooh；〃　

and；　for　the　most　part；　went　over　to　the　Dissenters。'



'Very　true；'　said　the　man　in　black；　taking　a　sip　at　his　glass；　'but　

why　were　the　Dissenters　allowed　to　preach？　why　were　they　not　beaten　

on　the　lips　till　they　spat　out　blood；　with　a　dislodged　tooth　or　

two？　　Why；　but　because　the　authority　of　the　Church　of　England　has；　

by　its　own　fault；　become　so　circumscribed　that　Mr。　Platitude　was　

not　able　to　send　a　host　of　beadles　and　sbirri　to　their　chapel　to　

bring　them　to　reason；　on　which　account　Mr。　Platitude　is　very　

properly　ashamed　of　his　Church；　and　is　thinking　of　uniting　himself　

with　one　which　possesses　more　vigour　and　authority。'



'It　may　have　vigour　and　authority；'　said　I；　'in　foreign　lands；　but　

in　these　kingdoms　the　day　for　practising　its　atrocities　is　gone　by。　　

It　is　at　present　almost　below　contempt；　and　is　obliged　to　sue　for　

grace　IN　FORMA　PAUPERIS。'



'Very　true；'　said　the　man　in　black；　'but　let　it　once　obtain　

emancipation；　and　it　will　cast　its　slough；　put　on　its　fine　clothes；　

and　make　converts　by　thousands。　　'What　a　fine　Church！'　they'll　say；　

'with　what　authority　it　speaks！　no　doubts；　no　hesitation；　no　

sticking　at　trifles。　　What　a　contrast　to　the　sleepy　English　Church！　　

They'll　go　over　to　it　by　millions；　till　it　preponderates　here　over　

every　other；　when　it　will　of　course　be　voted　the　dominant　one；　and　

then　…　and　then　…　'　and　here　the　man　in　black　drank　a　considerable　

quantity　of　gin　and　water。



'What　then？'　said　I。



'What　then？'　said　the　man　in　black；　'why　she　will　be　true　to　

herself。　　Let　Dissenters；　whether　they　be　Church　of　England；　as　

perhaps　they　may　still　call　themselves；　Methodist；　or　Presbyterian；　

presume　to　grumble；　and　there　shall　be　bruising　of　lips　in　pulpits；　

tying　up　to　whipping…posts；　cutting　off　ears　and　noses　…　he！　he！　

the　farce　of　King　Log　has　been　acted　long　enough；　the　time　for　

Queen　Stork's　tragedy　is　drawing　nigh'；　and　the　man　in　black　sipped　

his　gin　and　water　in　a　very　exulting　manner。



'And　this　is　the　Church　which；　according　to　your　assertion　in　the　

public…house；　never　persecutes？'



'I　have　already　given　you　an　answer；'　said　the　man　in　black。　　'With　

respect　to　the　matter　of　the　public…house；　it　is　one　of　the　happy　

privileges　of　those　who　belong　to　my　Church　to　deny　in　the　public…

house　what　they　admit　in　the　dingle；　we　have　high　warranty　for　such　

double　speaking。　　Did　not　the　foundation　stone　of　our　Church；　Saint　

Peter；　deny　in　the　public…house　what　he　had　previously　professed　in　

the　valley？'



'And　do　you　think；'　said　I；　'that　the　people　of　England；　who　have　

shown　aversion　to　anything　in　the　shape　of　intolerance；　will　permit　

such　barbarities　as　you　have　described？'



'Let　them　become　Papists；'　said　the　man　in　black；　'only　let　the　

majority　become　Papists；　and　you　will　see。'



'They　will　never　become　so；'　said　I；　'the　good　sense　of　the　people　

of　England　will　never　permit　them　to　commit　such　an　absurdity。'



'The　good　sense　of　the　people　of　England！'　said　the　man　in　black；　

filling　himself　another　glass。



'Yes；'　said　I；　'the　good　sense　of　not　only　the　upper；　but　the　

middle　and　lower　classes。'



'And　of　what　description　of　people　are　the　upper　class？'　said　the　

man　in　black；　putting　a　lump　of　sugar　into　his　gin　and　water。



'Very　fine　people；'　said　I；　'monstrously　fine　people；　so；　at　least；　

they　are　generally　believed　to　be。'



'He！　he！'　said　the　man　in　black；　'only　those　think　them　so　who　

don't　know　them。　　The　male　part　of　the　upper　class　are　in　youth　a　

set　of　heartless　profligates；　in　old　age；　a　parcel　of　poor；　

shaking；　nervous　paillards。　　The　female　part；　worthy　to　be　the　

sisters　and　wives　of　such　wretches　…　unmarried；　full　of　cold　vice；　

kept　under　by　vanity　and　ambition；　but　which；　after　marriage；　they　

seek　not　to　restrain；　in　old　age；　abandoned　to　vapours　and　horrors；　

do　you　think　that　such　beings　will　afford　any　obstacle　to　the　

progress　of　the　Church　in　these　regions；　as　soon　as　her　movements　

are　unfettered？'



'I　cannot　give　an　opinion；　I　know　nothing　of　them；　except　from　a　

distance。　　But　what　think　you　of　the　middle　classes？'



'Their　chief　characteristic；'　said　the　man　in　black；　'is　a　rage　for　

grandeur　and　gentility；　and　that　same　rage　makes　us　quite　sure　of　

them　in　the　long　run。　　Everything　that's　lofty　meets　their　

unqualified　approbation；　whilst　everything　humble；　or；　as　they　call　

it；　〃low；〃　is　scouted　by　them。　　They　begin　to　have　a　vague　idea　

that　the　religion　which　they　have　hitherto　professed　is　low；　at　any　

rate；　that　it　is　not　the　religion　of　the　mighty　ones　of　the　earth；　

of　the　great　kings　and　emperors　whose　shoes　they　have　a　vast　

inclination　to　kiss；　nor　was　used　by　the　grand　personages　of　whom　

they　have　read　in　their　novels　and　romances；　their　Ivanhoes；　their　

Marmions；　and　their　Ladies　of　the　Lake。'



'Do　you　think　that　the　writings　of　Scott　have　had　any　influence　in　

modifying　their　religious　opinions？'



'Most　certainly　I　do；'　said　the　man　in　black。　　'The　writings　of　

that　man　have　made　them　greater　fools　than　they　were　before。　　All　

their　conversation　now　is　about　gallant　knights；　princesses；　and　

cavaliers；　with　which　his　pages　are　stuffed　…　all　of　whom　were　

Papists；　or　very　High　Church；　which　is　nearly　the　same　thing；　and　

they　are　beginning　to　think　that　the　religion　of　such　nice　sweet…

scented　gentry　must　be　something　very　superfine。　　Why；　I　know　at　

Birmingham　the　daughter　of　an　ironmonger；　who　screeches　to　the　

piano　the　Lady　of　the　Lake's　hymn　to　the　Virgin　Mary；　always　weeps　

when　Mary　Queen　of　Scots　is　mentioned；　and　fasts　on　the　anniversary　

of　the　death　of　that　very　wise　martyr；　Charles　the　First。　　Why；　I　

would　engage　to　convert　such　an　idiot　to　popery　in　a　week；　were　it　

worth　my　trouble。　　O　Cavaliere　Gualtiero；　avete　fatto　molto　in　

favore　della　Santa　Sede！'



'If　he　has；'　said　I；　'he　has　done　it　unwittingly；　I　never　heard　

before　that　he　was　a　favourer　of　the　popish　delusion。'



'Only　in　theory；'　said　the　man　in　black。　　'Trust　any　of　the　clan　

Mac…Sycophant　for　interfering　openly　and　boldly　in　favour　of　any　

cause　on　which　the　sun　does　not　shine　benignantly。　　Popery　is　at　

present；　as　you　say；　suing　for　grace　in　these　regions　IN　FORMA　

PAUPERIS；　but　let　royalty　once　take　it　up；　let　old　gouty　George　

once　patronise　it；　and　I　would　consent　to　drink　puddle…water　if；　

the　very　next　time　the　canny　Scot　was　admitted　to　the　royal　

symposium；　he　did　not　say；　〃By　my　faith；　yere　Majesty；　I　have　

always　thought；　at　the　bottom　of　my　heart；　that　popery；　as　ill…

scrapit　tongues　ca'　it；　was　a　very　grand　religion；　I　shall　be　proud　

to　follow　your　Majesty's　example　in　adopting　it。〃'



'I　doubt　not；'　said　I；　'that　both　gouty　George　and　his　devoted　

servant　will　be　mouldering　in　their　tombs　long　before　Royalty　in　

England　thinks　about　adopting　popery。'



'We　can　wait；'　said　the　man　in　black；　'in　these　days　of　rampant　

gentility；　there　will　be　no　want　of　kings　nor　of　Scots　about　them。'



'But　not　Walters；'　said　I。



'Our　work　has　been　already　tolerably　well　done　by　one；'　said　the　

man　in　black；　'but　if　we　wanted　literature；　we　should　never　lack　in　

these　regions　hosts　of　literary　men　of　some　kind　or　other　to　

eulogise　us；　provided　our　religion　were　in　the　fashion；　and　our　

popish　nobles　chose　…　and　they　always　do　our　bidding　…　to　admit　the　

canaille　to　their　tables　…　their　kitchen　tables。　　As　for　literature　

in　general；'　said　he；　'the　Santa　Sede　is　not　particularly　partial　

to　it；　it　may　be　employed　both　ways。　　In　Italy；　in　particular；　it　

has　discovered　that　literary　men　are　not　always　disposed　to　be　

lickspittles。'



'For　example；　Dante；'