the lily of the valley- 第39部分

From　that　upper　sphere　the　romantic　yet　simple　story　of　a　young　man

piously　adoring　a　beautiful　woman　remote　from　the　world；　noble　in　her

solitude；　faithful　without　support　to　duty；　spread；　no　doubt　quickly；

through　the　faubourg　St。　Germain。　In　the　salons　I　was　the　object　of

embarrassing　notice；　for　retired　life　has　advantages　which　if　once

experienced　make　the　burden　of　a　constant　social　intercourse

insupportable。　Certain　minds　are　painfully　affected　by　violent

contrasts；　just　as　eyes　accustomed　to　soft　colors　are　hurt　by　glaring

light。　This　was　my　condition　then；　you　may　be　surprised　at　it　now；　but

have　patience；　the　inconsistencies　of　the　Vandenesse　of　to…day　will　be

explained　to　you。



I　found　society　courteous　and　women　most　kind。　After　the　marriage　of

the　Duc　de　Berry　the　court　resumed　its　former　splendor　and　the　glory

of　the　French　fetes　revived。　The　Allied　occupation　was　over；

prosperity　reappeared；　enjoyments　were　again　possible。　Noted

personages；　illustrious　by　rank；　prominent　by　fortune；　came　from　all

parts　of　Europe　to　the　capital　of　the　intellect；　where　the　merits　and

the　vices　of　other　countries　were　found　magnified　and　whetted　by　the

charms　of　French　intellect。



Five　months　after　leaving　Clochegourde　my　good　angel　wrote　me；　in　the

middle　of　the　winter；　a　despairing　letter；　telling　me　of　the　serious

illness　of　her　son。　He　was　then　out　of　danger；　but　there　were　many

fears　for　the　future；　the　doctor　said　that　precautions　were　necessary

for　his　lungsthe　suggestion　of　a　terrible　idea　which　had　put　the

mother's　heart　in　mourning。　Hardly　had　Jacques　begun　to　convalesce；

and　she　could　breathe　again；　when　Madeleine　made　them　all　uneasy。　That

pretty　plant；　whose　bloom　had　lately　rewarded　the　mother's　culture；

was　now　frail　and　pallid　and　anemic。　The　countess；　worn…out　by

Jacques'　long　illness；　found　no　courage；　she　said；　to　bear　this

additional　blow；　and　the　ever　present　spectacle　of　these　two　dear

failing　creatures　made　her　insensible　to　the　redoubled　torment　of　her

husband's　temper。　Thus　the　storms　were　again　raging；　tearing　up　by　the

roots　the　hopes　that　were　planted　deepest　in　her　bosom。　She　was　now　at

the　mercy　of　the　count；　weary　of　the　struggle；　she　allowed　him　to

regain　all　the　ground　he　had　lost。



〃When　all　my　strength　is　employed　in　caring　for　my　children；〃　she

wrote；　〃how　is　it　possible　to　employ　it　against　Monsieur　de　Mortsauf；

how　can　I　struggle　against　his　aggressions　when　I　am　fighting　against

death？　Standing　here　to…day；　alone　and　much　enfeebled；　between　these

two　young　images　of　mournful　fate；　I　am　overpowered　with　disgust；

invincible　disgust　for　life。　What　blow　can　I　feel；　to　what　affection

can　I　answer；　when　I　see　Jacques　motionless　on　the　terrace；　scarcely　a

sign　of　life　about　him；　except　in　those　dear　eyes；　large　by

emaciation；　hollow　as　those　of　an　old　man　and；　oh；　fatal　sign；　full　of

precocious　intelligence　contrasting　with　his　physical　debility。　When　I

look　at　my　pretty　Madeleine；　once　so　gay；　so　caressing；　so　blooming；

now　white　as　death；　her　very　hair　and　eyes　seem　to　me　to　have　paled；

she　turns　a　languishing　look　upon　me　as　if　bidding　me　farewell；

nothing　rouses　her；　nothing　tempts　her。　In　spite　of　all　my　efforts　I

cannot　amuse　my　children；　they　smile　at　me；　but　their　smile　is　only　in

answer　to　my　endearments；　it　does　not　come　from　them。　They　weep

because　they　have　no　strength　to　play　with　me。　Suffering　has　enfeebled

their　whole　being；　it　has　loosened　even　the　ties　that　bound　them　to

me。



〃Thus　you　can　well　believe　that　Clochegourde　is　very　sad。　Monsieur　de

Mortsauf　now　rules　everythingOh　my　friend！　you；　my　glory！〃　she

wrote；　farther　on；　〃you　must　indeed　love　me　well　to　love　me　still；　to

love　me　callous；　ungrateful；　turned　to　stone　by　grief。〃







CHAPTER　III



THE　TWO　WOMEN



It　was　at　this　time；　when　I　was　never　more　deeply　moved　in　my　whole

being；　when　I　lived　in　that　soul　to　which　I　strove　to　send　the

luminous　breeze　of　the　mornings　and　the　hope　of　the　crimsoned

evenings；　that　I　met；　in　the　salons　of　the　Elysee…Bourbon；　one　of

those　illustrious　ladies　who　reign　as　sovereigns　in　society。　Immensely

rich；　born　of　a　family　whose　blood　was　pure　from　all　misalliance　since

the　Conquest；　married　to　one　of　the　most　distinguished　old　men　of　the

British　peerage；　it　was　nevertheless　evident　that　these　advantages

were　mere　accessories　heightening　this　lady's　beauty；　graces；　manners；

and　wit；　all　of　which　had　a　brilliant　quality　which　dazzled　before　it

charmed。　She　was　the　idol　of　the　day；　reigning　the　more　securely　over

Parisian　society　because　she　possessed　the　quality　most　necessary　to

success；the　hand　of　iron　in　the　velvet　glove　spoken　of　by

Bernadotte。



You　know　the　singular　characteristics　of　English　people；　the　distance

and　coldness　of　their　own　Channel　which　they　put　between　them　and

whoever　has　not　been　presented　to　them　in　a　proper　manner。　Humanity

seems　to　be　an　ant…hill　on　which　they　tread；　they　know　none　of　their

species　except　the　few　they　admit　into　their　circle；　they　ignore　even

the　language　of　the　rest；　tongues　may　move　and　eyes　may　see　in　their

presence　but　neither　sound　nor　look　has　reached　them；　to　them；　the

people　are　as　if　they　were　not。　The　British　present　an　image　of　their

own　island；　where　law　rules　everything；　where　all　is　automatic　in

every　station　of　life；　where　the　exercise　of　virtue　appears　to　be　the

necessary　working　of　a　machine　which　goes　by　clockwork。　Fortifications

of　polished　steel　rise　around　the　Englishwoman　behind　the　golden　wires

of　her　household　cage　（where　the　feed…box　and　the　drinking…cup；　the

perches　and　the　food　are　exquisite　in　quality）；　but　they　make　her

irresistibly　attractive。　No　people　ever　trained　married　women　so

carefully　to　hypocrisy　by　holding　them　rigidly　between　the　two

extremes　of　death　or　social　station；　for　them　there　is　no　middle　path

between　shame　and　honor；　either　the　wrong　is　completed　or　it　does　not

exist；　it　is　all　or　nothing；Hamlet's　〃To　be　or　not　to　be。〃　This

alternative；　coupled　with　the　scorn　to　which　the　customs　of　her

country　have　trained　her；　make　an　Englishwoman　a　being　apart　in　the

world。　She　is　a　helpless　creature；　forced　to　be　virtuous　yet　ready　to

yield；　condemned　to　live　a　lie　in　her　heart；　yet　delightful　in　outward

appearancefor　these　English　rest　everything　on　appearances。　Hence

the　special　charms　of　their　women：　the　enthusiasm　for　a　love　which　is

all　their　life；　the　minuteness　of　their　care　for　their　persons；　the

delicacy　of　their　passion；　so　charmingly　rendered　in　the　famous　scene

of　Romeo　and　Juliet　in　which；　with　one　stroke；　Shakespeare's　genius

depicted　his　country…women。



You；　who　envy　them　so　many　things；　what　can　I　tell　you　that　you　do　not

know　of　these　white　sirens；　impenetrable　apparently　but　easily

fathomed；　who　believe　that　love　suffices　love；　and　turn　enjoyments　to

satiety　by　never　varying　them；　whose　soul　has　one　note　only；　their

voice　one　syllablean　ocean　of　love　in　themselves；　it　is　true；　and　he

who　has　never　swum　there　misses　part　of　the　poetry　of　the　senses；　as

he　who　has　never　seen　the　sea　has　lost　some　strings　of　his　lyre。　You

know　the　why　and　wherefore　of　these　words。　My　relations　with　the

Marchioness　of　Dudley　had　a　disastrous　celebrity。　At　an　age　when　the

senses　have　dominion　over　our　conduct；　and　when　in　my　case　they　had

been　violently　repressed　by　circumstances；　the　image　of　the　saint

bearing　her　slow　martyrdom　at　Clochegourde　shone　so　vividly　before　my

mind　that　I　was　able　to　resist　all　seductions。　It　was　the　lustre　of

this　fidelity　which　attracted　Lady　Dudley's　attention。　My　resistance

stimulated　her　passion。　What　she　chiefly　desired；　like　many

Englishwoman；　was　the　spice　of　singularity；　she　wanted　pepper；

capsicum；　with　her　heart's　food；　just　as　Englishmen　need　condiments　to

excite　their　appetite。　The　dull　languor　forced　into　the　lives　of　these

women　by　the　constant　perfection　of　everything　about　them；　the

methodical　regularity　of　their　habits；　leads　them　to　adore　the

romantic　and　to　welcome　difficulty。　I　was　wholly　unable　to　judge　of

such　a　character。　The　more　I　retreated　to　a　cold　distance　the　more

impassioned　Lady　Dudley　became。　The　struggle；　in　which　she　gloried；

excited　the　curiosity　of　several　persons；　and　this　in　itself　was　a

form　of　happiness　which　to　her　mind　made　ultimate　triumph　obligatory。

Ah！　I　might　have　been　saved　if　some　good　friend　had　then　repeated　to

me　her　cruel　comment　on　my　relations　with　Madame　de　Mortsauf。



〃I　am　wearied　to　death；〃　she　said；　〃of　these　turtle…dove　sighings。〃



Without　seeking　to　justify　my　crime；　I　ask　you　to　observe；　Natalie；

that　a　man　has　fewer　means　of　resisting　a　woman　than　she　has　of

escaping　him。　Our　code　of　manners　forbids　the　brutality　of　repressing

a　woman；　whereas　repression　with　your　sex　is　not　only　allurement　to

ours；　but　is　imposed　upon　you　by　conventions。　With　us；　on　the

contrary；　some　unwritten　law　of　masculine　self…conceit　ridicules　a

man's　modesty；　we　leave　you　the　monopoly　of　that　virtue；　that　you　may

have　the　privilege　of　granting　us　favors；　but　reverse　the　case；　and

man　succumbs　before　sarcasm。



Though　protected　by　my　love；　I　was　not　of　an　age　to　be　wholly

insensible　to　the　triple　seductions　of　pride；　devotion；　and　beauty。

When　Arabella　laid　at　my　feet　the　homage　of　a　ball…room　where　she

reigned　a　queen；　when　she　watched　by　glance　to　know　if　my　taste

approved　of　her　dress；　and　when　she　trembled　with　pleasure　on　seeing

that　she　pleased　me；　I　was　affected　by　her　emotion。　Besides；　she

occupied　a　social　position　where　I　could　not　escape　her；　I　could　not

refuse　invitations　in　the　diplomatic　circle；　her　rank　admitted　her

everywhere；　and　with　the　cleverness　all　women　display　to　obtain　what

pleases　them；　she　often　contrived　that　the　mistress　of　the　house

should　place　me　beside　her　at　dinner。　On　such　occasions　she　spoke　in

low　tones　to　my　ear。　〃If　I　were　loved　like　Madame　de　Mortsa