the price she paid- 第48部分

‘‘I　know；''　said　Agnes。　　‘‘And　you'd　better　fight　them　hard。　　They're　unworthy　of　you。''

‘‘Butmusical　comedy！　　It'sfrightful！''

‘‘It's　an　honest　way　of　making　a　living；　and　that's　more　than　can　be　said　ofof　some　things。　　I　suppose　you're　afraid　you'll　have　to　wear　tightsor　some　nonsense　like　that。''

‘‘No；　no。　　It's　doing　it　at　all。　　Such　rotten　music　and　what　a　loathsome　mess！''

Mrs。　Belloc's　eyes　flashed。　　‘‘I'm　losing　all　patience！''　she　cried。　　‘‘I　know　you've　been　brought　up　like　a　fool　and　always　surrounded　by　fools。　　I　suppose　you'd　rather　sell　yourself　to　some　man。　　Do　you　know　what's　the　matter　with　you；　at　bottom？　　Why；　you're　lazy　and　you're　a　coward。　　Too　lazy　to　work。　　And　afraid　of　what　a　lot　of　cheap　women'll　saywomen　earning　their　board　and　clothes　in　about　the　lowest　way　such　a　thing　can　be　done。　　Haven't　you　got　any　self…　respect？''

Mildred　rose。　　‘‘Mrs。　Belloc；''　she　said　angrily；　‘‘I　can't　permit　even　you　to　say　such　things　to　me。''

‘‘The　shoe　seems　to　fit；''　retorted　Mrs。　Belloc。　　‘‘I　never　yet　saw　a　lady；　a　real；　silk…and…diamonds；　sit…in…　the…parlor　lady；　who　had　any　self…respect。　　If　I　had　my　way　they　wouldn't　get　a　mouthful　to　eat　till　they　had　earned　it。　　That'd　be　a　sure　cure　for　the　lady　disease。　　I'm　ashamed　of　you；　Miss　Stevens！　　And　you're　ashamed　of　yourself。''

‘‘Yes；　I　am；''　said　Mildred；　with　a　sudden　change　of　mood。

‘‘The　best　thing　you　can　do　is　to　rest　till　lunch…time。　Then　start　out　after　lunch　and　hunt　a　job。　　I'll　go　with　you。''

‘‘But　I've　got　a　job；''　said　Mildred。　　‘‘That's　what's　the　matter。''

Agnes　Belloc's　jaw　dropped　and　her　rather　heavy　eyebrows　shot　up　toward　the　low　sweeping　line　of　her　auburn　hair。　　She　made　such　a　ludicrous　face　that　Mildred　laughed　outright。　　Said　she：

‘‘It's　quite　time。　　Fifty　a　week；　for　three　weeks　of　rehearsal。　　No　doubt　_I_　can　go　on　if　I　like。　　Nothing　could　be　easier。''

‘‘Crossley？''

‘‘Yes。　　He　was　very　niceheard　me　sing　three　piecesand　it　was　all　settled。　　I'm　to　begin　to…morrow。''

The　color　rose　in　Agnes　Belloc's　face　until　she　looked　apoplectic。　　She　abruptly　retreated　to　her　bedroom。　After　a　few　minutes　she　came　back；　her　normal　complexion　restored。　　‘‘I　couldn't　trust　myself　to　speak；''　said　she。　　‘‘That　was　the　worst　case　of　ingratitude　I　ever　met　up　with。　　You；　getting　a　place　at　fifty　dollars　a　weekand　on　your　first　trialand　you　come　in　looking　as　if　you'd　lost　your　money　and　your　reputation。　　What　kind　of　a　girl　are　you；　anyway？''

‘‘I　don't　know；''　said　Mildred。　　‘‘I　wish　I　did。''

‘‘Well；　I'm　sorry　you　got　it　so　easy。　　Now　you'll　have　a　false　notion　from　the　start。　　It's　always　better　to　have　a　hard　time　getting　things。　　Then　you　appreciate　them；　and　have　learned　how　to　hold　on。''

‘‘No　trouble　about　holding　on　to　this；''　said　Mildred　carelessly。

‘‘Please　don't　talk　that　way；　child；''　pleaded　Agnes；　almost　tearful。　　‘‘It's　frightful　to　me；　who've　had　experience；　to　hear　you　invite　a　fall…down。''

Mildred　disdainfully　fluttered　the　typewritten　copy　of　the　musical　comedy。　　‘‘This　is　child's　play；''　said　she。　‘‘The　lines　are　beneath　contempt。　　As　for　the　songs；　you　never　heard　such　slop。''

‘‘The　stars　in　those　pieces　get　four　and　five　hundred；　and　more；　a　week；''　said　Mrs。　Belloc。　　‘‘Believe　me；　those　managers　don't　pay　out　any　such　sums　for　child's　play。　　You　look　out。　　You're　going　at　this　wrong。''

‘‘I　shan't　care　if　I　do　fail；''　said　Mildred。

‘‘Do　you　mean　that？''　demanded　Mrs。　Belloc。

‘‘No；　I　don't；''　said　Mildred。　　‘‘Oh；　I　don't　know　what　I　mean。''

‘‘I　guess　you're　just　talking；''　said　Mrs。　Belloc　after　a　reflective　silence。　　‘‘I　guess　a　girl　who　goes　and　gets　a　good　job；　first　crack　out　of　the　box；　must　have　a　streak　of　shrewdness。''

‘‘I　hope　so；''　said　Mildred　doubtfully。

‘‘I　guess　you'll　work　hard；　all　right。　　After　you　went　out　this　morning；　I　took　that　paper　down　to　Miss　Blond。　　She's　crazy　about　it。　　She　wants　to　make　a　copy　of　it。　　I　told　her　I'd　ask　you。''

‘‘Certainly；''　said　Mildred。　‘‘She　says　she'll　return　it　the　same　day。''

‘‘Tell　her　she　can　keep　it　as　long　as　she　likes。''

Mrs。　Belloc　eyed　her　gravely；　started　to　speak；　checked　herself。　　Instead；　she　said；　‘‘No；　I　shan't　do　that。　　I'll　have　it　back　in　your　room　by　this　evening。　You　might　change　your　mind；　and　want　to　use　it。''

‘‘Very　well；''　said　Mildred；　pointedly　uninterested　and　ignoring　Mrs。　Belloc's　delicate　but　distinct　emphasis　upon　‘‘might。''

Mrs。　Belloc　kept　a　suspicious　eye　upon　heran　eye　that　was　not　easily　deceived。　　The　more　she　thought　about　Mildred's　state　of　depression　and　disdain　the　more　tolerant　she　became。　　That　mood　was　the　natural　and　necessary　result　of　the　girl's　bringing　up　and　mode　of　life。　　The　important　thingand　the　wonderful　thing　was　her　being　able　to　overcome　it。　　After　a　week　of　rehearsal　she　said：　　‘‘I'm　making　the　best　of　it。　　But　I　don't　like　it；　and　never　shall。''

‘‘I　should　hope　not；''　replied　Mrs。　Belloc。　　‘‘You're　going　to　the　top。　　I'd　hate　to　see　you　contented　at　the　bottom。　　Aren't　you　learning　a　good　deal　that'll　be　useful　later　on？''

‘‘That's　why　I'm　reconciled　to　it；''　said　she。　　‘‘The　stage　director；　Mr。　Ransdell；　is　teaching　me　everything　even　how　to　sing。　　He　knows　his　business。''

Ransdell　not　only　knew；　but　also　took　endless　pains　with　her。　　He　was　a　tall；　thin；　dark　man；　strikingly　handsome　in　the　distinguished　way。　　So　distinguished　looking　was　he　that　to　meet　him　was　to　wonder　why　he　had　not　made　a　great　name　for　himself。　　An　extraordinary　mind　he　certainly　had；　and　an　insight　into　the　reasons　for　things　that　is　given　only　to　genius。　　He　had　failed　as　a　composer；　failed　as　a　playwright；　failed　as　a　singer；　failed　as　an　actor。　　He　had　been　forced　to　take　up　the　profession　of　putting　on　dramatic　and　musical　plays；　a　profession　that　required　vast　knowledge　and　high　talents　and　paid　for　them　in　niggardly　fashion　both　in　money　and　in　fame。　　Crossley　owed　to　him　more　than　to　any　other　single　element　the　series　of　successes　that　had　made　him　rich；　yet　the　ten　thousand　a　year　Crossley　paid　him　was　regarded　as　evidence　of　Crossley's　lavish　generosity　and　was　so。　　It　would　have　been　difficult　to　say　why　a　man　so　splendidly　endowed　by　nature　and　so　tireless　in　improving　himself　was　thus　unsuccessful。　　Probably　he　lacked　judgment；　indeed；　that　lack　must　have　been　the　cause。　　He　could　judge　for　Crossley；　but　not　for　himself；　not　when　he　had　the　feeling　of　ultimate　responsibility。

Mildred　had　anticipated　the　most　repulsive　associations　men　and　women　of　low　origin　and　of　vulgar　tastes　and　of　vulgarly　loose　lives。　　She　found　herself　surrounded　by　simple；　pleasant　people；　undoubtedly　erratic　for　the　most　part　in　all　their　habits；　but　without　viciousness。　　And　they　were　hard　workers；　all。　　Ransdell　for　Crossleytolerated　no　nonsense。　　His　people　could　live　as　they　pleased；　away　from　the　theater；　but　there　they　must　be　prompt　and　fit。　　The　discipline　was　as　severe　as　that　of　a　monastery。　　She　saw　many　signs　that　all　sorts　of　things　of　the　sort　with　which　she　wished　to　have　no　contact　were　going　on　about　her；　but　as　she　held　slightlybut　not　at　all　haughtilyaloof；　she　would　have　had　to　go　out　of　her　way　to　see　enough　to　scandalize　her。　　She　soon　suspected　that　she　was　being　treated　with　extraordinary　consideration。　　This　was　by　Crossley's　orders。　　But　the　carrying　out　of　their　spirit　as　well　as　their　letter　was　due　to　Ransdell。　　Before　the　end　of　that　first　week　she　knew　that　there　was　the　personal　element　behind　his　admiration　for　her　voice　and　her　talent　for　acting；　behind　his　concentrating　most　of　his　attention　upon　her　part。　　He　looked　his　love　boldly　whenever　they　were　alone；　he　was　always　trying　to　touch　hernever　in　a　way　that　she　could　have　resented；　or　felt　like　resenting。　　He　was　not　unattractive　to　her；　and　she　was　eager　to　learn　all　he　had　to　teach；　and　saw　no　harm　in　helping　herself　by　letting　him　love。

Toward　the　middle　of　the　second　week；　when　they　were　alone　in　her　dressing…room；　hewith　the　ingenious　lack　of　abruptness　of　the　experienced　man　at　the　game　took　her　hand；　and　before　she　was　ready；　kissed　her。　He　did　not　accompany　these　advances　with　an　outburst　of　passionate　words　or　with　any　fiery　lighting　up　of　the　eyes；　but　calmly；　smilingly；　as　if　it　were　what　she　was　expecting　him　to　do；　what　he　had　a　right　to　do。

She　did　not　know　quite　how　to　meet　this　novel　attack。　She　drew　her　hand　away；　went　on　talking　about　the　partthe　changes　he　had　suggested　in　her　entrance；　as　she　sang　her　best　solo。　　He　discussed　this　with　her　until　they　rose　to　leave　the　theater。　　He　looked　smilingly　down　on　her；　and　said　with　the　flattering　air　of　the　satisfied　connoisseur：

‘‘Yes；　you　are　charming；　Mildred。　　I　can　make　a　great　artist　and　a　great　success　out　of　you。　　We　need　each　other。''

‘‘I　certainly　need　you；''　said　she　gratefully。　　‘‘How　much　you've　done　for　me。''

‘‘Only　the　beginning；''　replied　he。　　‘‘Ah；　I　have　such　plans　for　yousuch　plans。　　Crossley　doesn't　realize　how　far　you　can　be　made　to　gowith　the　right　training。　　Without　it''　　He　shook　his　head　laughingly。　‘‘But　you　shall　have　it；　my　dear。''　　And　he　laid　his　hands　lightly　and　caressingly　upon　her　shoulders。

The　gesture　was　apparently　a　friendly　familiarity。　To　resent　it；　even　to　draw　away；　would　put　her　in　the　attitude　of　the　woman　absurdly　exercised　about　the　desirability　and　sacredness　of　her　own　charms。

Still　smiling；　in　that　friendly；　assured　way；　he　went　on：　　‘‘You've　been　very　cold　and　reserved　with　me；　my　dear。　　Very　unappreciative。''

Mildred；　red　and　trembling；　hung　her　head　in　confusion。

‘‘I've　been　at　the　business　ten　years；''　he　went　on；　‘‘and　you're　the　first　woman　I've　been　more　than　casually　interested　in。　　The　pretty　ones　were　bores。　　The　homely　onesI　can't　interest　myself　in　a　homely　woman；　no　matter　how　much　talent　she　has。　　A　woman　must　first　of　all　satisfy　the　eye。　　And　you''　　He　seated　himself　and　drew　her　toward　him。　　She；　cold　all　over　and　confused　in　mind　and　almost　stupefied；　resisted　with　all　her　strength；　but　her　strength　seemed　to　be　oozing　away。　　She　said：

‘‘You　must　not　do　this。　　You　must　not　do　this。　　I'm　horribly　disappointed　in　you。''

He　drew　her　to　his　lap　and　held　her　there　without　any　apparent　tax　upon　his　strength。　　He　kissed　her；　laughingl