02-after the dance- 第1部分

AFTER　THE　DANCE




〃AND　you　say　that　a　man　cannot；　of　himself；
understand　what　is　good　and　evil；　that　it　is　all
environment；　that　the　environment　swamps　the
man。　　But　I　believe　it　is　all　chance。　　Take　my
own　case　。　。　。〃

Thus　spoke　our　excellent　friend；　Ivan　Vasilie…
vich；　after　a　conversation　between　us　on　the　impos…
sibility　of　improving　individual　character　without
a　change　of　the　conditions　under　which　men　live。　
Nobody　had　actually　said　that　one　could　not　of
oneself　understand　good　and　evil；　but　it　was　a
habit　of　Ivan　Vasilievich　to　answer　in　this　way　the
thoughts　aroused　in　his　own　mind　by　conversation；
and　to　illustrate　those　thoughts　by　relating　inci…
dents　in　his　own　life。　　He　often　quite　forgot　the
reason　for　his　story　in　telling　it；　but　he　always　told
it　with　great　sincerity　and　feeling。

He　did　so　now。

〃Take　my　own　case。　　My　whole　life　was
moulded；　not　by　environment；　but　by　something
quite　different。〃

〃By　what；　then？〃　we　asked。

〃Oh；　that　is　a　long　story。　　I　should　have　to
tell　you　about　a　great　many　things　to　make　you
understand。〃

〃Well；　tell　us　then。〃

Ivan　Vasilievich　thought　a　little；　and　shook　his
head。

〃My　whole　life；〃　he　said；　〃was　changed　in　one
night；　or；　rather；　morning。〃

〃Why；　what　happened？〃　one　of　us　asked。

〃What　happened　was　that　I　was　very　much　in
love。　　I　have　been　in　love　many　times；　but　this
was　the　most　serious　of　all。　　It　is　a　thing　of　the
past；　she　has　married　daughters　now。　　It　was
Varinka　B　〃　　Ivan　Vasilievich　mentioned　her
surname。　　〃Even　at　fifty　she　is　remarkably　hand…
some；　but　in　her　youth；　at　eighteen；　she　was　ex…
quisitetall；　slender；　graceful；　and　stately。　　Yes；
stately　is　the　word；　she　held　herself　very　erect；　by
instinct　as　it　were；　and　carried　her　head　high；　and
that　together　with　her　beauty　and　height　gave　her
a　queenly　air　in　spite　of　being　thin；　even　bony　one
might　say。　　It　might　indeed　have　been　deterring
had　it　not　been　for　her　smile；　which　was　always
gay　and　cordial；　and　for　the　charming　light　in
her　eyes　and　for　her　youthful　sweetness。〃

〃What　an　entrancing　description　you　give；　Ivan
Vasilievich！〃

〃Description；　indeed！　I　could　not　possibly　de…
scribe　her　so　that　you　could　appreciate　her。　　But
that　does　not　matter；　what　I　am　going　to　tell　you
happened　in　the　forties。　　I　was　at　that　time　a
student　in　a　provincial　university。　　I　don't　know
whether　it　was　a　good　thing　or　no；　but　we　had　no
political　clubs；　no　theories　in　our　universities　then。　
We　were　simply　young　and　spent　our　time　as　young
men　do；　studying　and　amusing　ourselves。　　I　was　a
very　gay；　lively；　careless　fellow；　and　had　plenty　of
money　too。　　I　had　a　fine　horse；　and　used　to　go
tobogganing　with　the　young　ladies。　　Skating　had
not　yet　come　into　fashion。　　I　went　to　drinking
parties　with　my　comradesin　those　days　we
drank　nothing　but　champagneif　we　had　no
champagne　we　drank　nothing　at　all。　　We　never
drank　vodka；　as　they　do　now。　　Evening　parties
and　balls　were　my　favourite　amusements。　　I
danced　well；　and　was　not　an　ugly　fellow。〃

〃Come；　there　is　no　need　to　be　modest；〃　inter…
rupted　a　lady　near　him。　　〃We　have　seen　your
photograph。　　Not　ugly；　indeed！　You　were　a
handsome　fellow。〃

〃Handsome；　if　you　like。　　That　does　not　mat…
ter。　　When　my　love　for　her　was　at　its　strongest；
on　the　last　day　of　the　carnival；　I　was　at　a　ball　at
the　provincial　marshal's；　a　good…natured　old　man；
rich　and　hospitable；　and　a　court　chamberlain。　　The
guests　were　welcomed　by　his　wife；　who　was　as
good…natured　as　himself。　　She　was　dressed　in
puce…coloured　velvet；　and　had　a　diamond　diadem
on　her　forehead；　and　her　plump；　old　white　shoul…
ders　and　bosom　were　bare　like　the　portraits　of
Empress　Elizabeth；　the　daughter　of　Peter　the
Great。

〃It　was　a　delightful　ball。　　It　was　a　splendid
room；　with　a　gallery　for　the　orchestra；　which　was
famous　at　the　time；　and　consisted　of　serfs　belong…
ing　to　a　musical　landowner。　　The　refreshments
were　magnificent；　and　the　champagne　flowed　in
rivers。　　Though　I　was　fond　of　champagne　I　did
not　drink　that　night；　because　without　it　I　was
drunk　with　love。　　But　I　made　up　for　it　by　danc…
ing　waltzes　and　polkas　till　I　was　ready　to　drop
of　course；　whenever　possible；　with　Varinka。　　She
wore　a　white　dress　with　a　pink　sash；　white　shoes；
and　white　kid　gloves；　which　did　not　quite　reach　to
her　thin　pointed　elbows。　　A　disgusting　engineer
named　Anisimov　robbed　me　of　the　mazurka　with
herto　this　day　I　cannot　forgive　him。　　He　asked
her　for　the　dance　the　minute　she　arrived；　while
I　had　driven　to　the　hair…dresser's　to　get　a　pair　of
gloves；　and　was　late。　　So　I　did　not　dance　the
mazurka　with　her；　but　with　a　German　girl　to　whom
I　had　previously　paid　a　little　attention；　but　I　am
afraid　I　did　not　behave　very　politely　to　her　that
evening。　　I　hardly　spoke　or　looked　at　her；　and　saw
nothing　but　the　tall；　slender　figure　in　a　white　dress；
with　a　pink　sash；　a　flushed；　beaming；　dimpled
face；　and　sweet；　kind　eyes。　　I　was　not　alone；　they
were　all　looking　at　her　with　admiration；　the　men
and　women　alike；　although　she　outshone　all　of
them。　　They　could　not　help　admiring　her。

〃Although　I　was　not　nominally　her　partner　for
the　mazurka；　I　did　as　a　matter　of　fact　dance　nearly
the　whole　time　with　her。　　She　always　came　for…
ward　boldly　the　whole　length　of　the　room　to　pick
me　out。　　I　flew　to　meet　her　without　waiting　to　be
chosen；　and　she　thanked　me　with　a　smile　for　my
intuition。　　When　I　was　brought　up　to　her　with
somebody　else；　and　she　guessed　wrongly；　she　took
the　other　man's　hand　with　a　shrug　of　her　slim
shoulders；　and　smiled　at　me　regretfully。

〃Whenever　there　was　a　waltz　figure　in　the
mazurka；　I　waltzed　with　her　for　a　long　time；　and
breathing　fast　and　smiling；　she　would　say；　'En…
core'；　and　I　went　on　waltzing　and　waltzing；　as
though　unconscious　of　any　bodily　existence。〃

〃Come　now；　how　could　you　be　unconscious　of
it　with　your　arm　round　her　waist？　You　must
have　been　conscious；　not　only　of　your　own　exist…
ence；　but　of　hers；〃　said　one　of　the　party。

Ivan　Vasilievich　cried　out；　almost　shouting　in
anger：　　〃　There　you　are；　moderns　all　over！　Now…
adays　you　think　of　nothing　but　the　body。　　It　was
different　in　our　day。　　The　more　I　was　in　love　the
less　corporeal　was　she　in　my　eyes。　　Nowadays　you
think　of　nothing　but　the　body。　　It　was　different
in　our　day。　　The　more　I　was　in　love　the　less　cor…
poreal　was　she　in　my　eyes。　　Nowadays　you　set
legs；　ankles；　and　I　don't　know　what。　　You　undress
the　women　you　are　in　love　with。　　In　my　eyes；　as
Alphonse　Karr　saidand　he　was　a　good　writer
'the　one　I　loved　was　always　draped　in　robes　of
bronze。'　We　never　thought　of　doing　so；　we　tried
to　veil　her　nakedness；　like　Noah's　good…natured
son。　　Oh；　well；　you　can't　understand。〃

〃Don't　pay　any　attention　to　him。　　Go　on；〃　said
one　of　them。

〃Well；　I　danced　for　the　most　part　with　her；
and　did　not　notice　how　time　was　passing。　　The
musicians　kept　playing　the　same　mazurka　tunes
over　and　over　again　in　desperate　exhaustionyou
know　what　it　is　towards　the　end　of　a　ball。　　Papas
and　mammas　were　already　getting　up　from　the
card…tables　in　the　drawing…room　in　expectation　of
supper；　the　men…servants　were　running　to　and
fro　bringing　in　things。　　It　was　nearly　three
o'clock。　　I　had　to　make　the　most　of　the　last
minutes。　　I　chose　her　again　for　the　mazurka；　and
for　the　hundredth　time　we　danced　across　the
room。

〃'The　quadrille　after　supper　is　mine；'　I　said；
taking　her　to　her　place。

〃'Of　course；　if　I　am　not　carried　off　home；'　she
said；　with　a　smile。

〃'I　won't　give　you　up；'　I　said。

〃'Give　me　my　fan；　anyhow；'　she　answered。

〃'I　am　so　sorry　to　part　with　it；'　I　said；　handing
her　a　cheap　white　fan。

〃'Well；　here's　something　to　console　you；'　she
said；　plucking　a　feather　out　of　the　fan；　and　giving
it　to　me。

〃I　took　the　feather；　and　could　only　express　my
rapture　and　gratitude　with　my　eyes。　　I　was　not
only　pleased　and　gay；　I　was　happy；　delighted；　I
was　good；　I　was　not　myself　but　some　being　not
of　this　earth；　knowing　nothing　of　evil。　　I　hid　the
feather　in　my　glove；　and　stood　there　unable　to
tear　myself　away　from　her。

〃'Look；　they　are　urging　father　to　dance；'　she
said　to　me；　pointing　to　the　tall；　stately　figure　of
her　father；　a　colonel　with　silver　epaulettes；　who
was　standing　in　the　doorway　with　some　ladies。

〃'Varinka；　come　here！'　exclaimed　our　hostess；
the　lady　with　the　diamond　ferronniere　and　with
shoulders　like　Elizabeth；　in　a　loud　voice。

〃'Varinka　went　to　the　door；　and　I　followed　her。　

〃'Persuade　your　father　to　dance　the　mazurka
with　you；　ma　chere。Do；　please；　Peter　Valdislavo…
vich；'　she　said；　turning　to　the　colonel。

〃Varinka's　father　was　a　very　handsome；　well…
preserved　old　man。　　He　had　a　good　colour；　mous…
taches　curled　in　the　style　of　Nicolas　I。；　and　white
whiskers　which　met　the　moustaches。　　His　hair　was
combed　on　to　his　forehead；　and　a　bright　smile；
like　his　daughter's；　was　on　his　lips　and　in　his　eyes。　
He　was　splendidly　set　up；　with　a　broad　military
chest；　on　which　he　wore　some　decorations；　and　he
had　powerful　shoulders　and　long　slim　legs。　　He
was　that　ultra…military　type　produced　by　the　disci…
pline　of　Emperor　Nicolas　I。

〃When　we　approached　the　door　the　colonel　was
just　refusing　to　dance；　saying　that　he　had　quite　for…
gotten　how；　but　at　that　instant　he　smiled；　swung
his　arm　gracefully　around　to　the　left；　drew　his
sword　from　its　sheath；　handed　it　to　an　obliging
young　man　who　stood　near；　and　smoothed　his
suede　glove　on　his　right　hand。

〃'Everything　must　be　done　according　to　rule；'
he　said　with　a　smile。　　He　took　the　hand　of　his
daughter；　and　stood　one…quarter　turned；　waiting
for　the　music。

〃At　the　first　sound　of　the　mazurka；　he　stamped
one　foot　smartly；　threw　the　other　forward；　and；
at　first　slowly　and　smoothly；　then　buoyantly　and
impetuously；　with　stamping　of　feet　and　clicking　of
boots；　his　tall；　imposing　figure　moved　the　length
of　the　room。　　Varinka　swayed　gracefully　beside
him；　rhythmically　and　easily；　making　her　steps
short　or　long；　with　her　little　feet　in　their　white　satin
slippers。

〃All　the　people　in　the　room　followed　every
movement　of　the　couple。　　As　for　me　I　not　only　ad…
mired；　I　regarded　them　with　enraptured　sym…
pathy。　　I　was　particularly　impressed　with　t