the vicar of tours- 第7部分

imperfections；　if；　on　the　contrary；　they　are　handsome；　that　fact

argues　that　their　misfortune　has　some　serious　cause。　It　is　impossible

to　say　which　of　the　two　classes　is　most　deserving　of　rejection。　If；　on

the　other　hand；　their　celibacy　is　deliberate；　if　it　proceeds　from　a

desire　for　independence；　neither　men　nor　mothers　will　forgive　their

disloyalty　to　womanly　devotion；　evidenced　in　their　refusal　to　feed

those　passions　which　render　their　sex　so　affecting。　To　renounce　the

pangs　of　womanhood　is　to　abjure　its　poetry　and　cease　to　merit　the

consolations　to　which　mothers　have　inalienable　rights。



Moreover；　the　generous　sentiments；　the　exquisite　qualities　of　a　woman

will　not　develop　unless　by　constant　exercise。　By　remaining　unmarried；

a　creature　of　the　female　sex　becomes　void　of　meaning；　selfish　and

cold；　she　creates　repulsion。　This　implacable　judgment　of　the　world　is

unfortunately　too　just　to　leave　old　maids　in　ignorance　of　its　causes。

Such　ideas　shoot　up　in　their　hearts　as　naturally　as　the　effects　of

their　saddened　lives　appear　upon　their　features。　Consequently　they

wither；　because　the　constant　expression　of　happiness　which　blooms　on

the　faces　of　other　women　and　gives　so　soft　a　grace　to　their　movements

has　never　existed　for　them。　They　grow　sharp　and　peevish　because　all

human　beings　who　miss　their　vocation　are　unhappy；　they　suffer；　and

suffering　gives　birth　to　the　bitterness　of　ill…will。　In　fact；　before

an　old　maid　blames　herself　for　her　isolation　she　blames　others；　and

there　is　but　one　step　between　reproach　and　the　desire　for　revenge。



But　more　than　this；　the　ill　grace　and　want　of　charm　noticeable　in

these　women　are　the　necessary　result　of　their　lives。　Never　having　felt

a　desire　to　please；　elegance　and　the　refinements　of　good　taste　are

foreign　to　them。　They　see　only　themselves　in　themselves。　This　instinct

brings　them；　unconsciously；　to　choose　the　things　that　are　most

convenient　to　themselves；　at　the　sacrifice　of　those　which　might　be

more　agreeable　to　others。　Without　rendering　account　to　their　own　minds

of　the　difference　between　themselves　and　other　women；　they　end　by

feeling　that　difference　and　suffering　under　it。　Jealousy　is　an

indelible　sentiment　in　the　female　breast。　An　old　maid's　soul　is

jealous　and　yet　void；　for　she　knows　but　one　sidethe　miserable　side

of　the　only　passion　men　will　allow　（because　it　flatters　them）　to

women。　Thus　thwarted　in　all　their　hopes；　forced　to　deny　themselves　the

natural　development　of　their　natures；　old　maids　endure　an　inward

torment　to　which　they　never　grow　accustomed。　It　is　hard　at　any　age；

above　all　for　a　woman；　to　see　a　feeling　of　repulsion　on　the　faces　of

others；　when　her　true　destiny　is　to　move　all　hearts　about　her　to

emotions　of　grace　and　love。　One　result　of　this　inward　trouble　is　that

an　old　maid's　glance　is　always　oblique；　less　from　modesty　than　from

fear　and　shame。　Such　beings　never　forgive　society　for　their　false

position　because　they　never　forgive　themselves　for　it。



Now　it　is　impossible　for　a　woman　who　is　perpetually　at　war　with

herself　and　living　in　contradiction　to　her　true　life；　to　leave　others

in　peace　or　refrain　from　envying　their　happines。　The　whole　range　of

these　sad　truths　could　be　read　in　the　dulled　gray　eyes　of　Mademoiselle

Gamard；　the　dark　circles　that　surrounded　those　eyes　told　of　the　inward

conflicts　of　her　solitary　life。　All　the　wrinkles　on　her　face　were　in

straight　lines。　The　structure　of　her　forehead　and　cheeks　was　rigid　and

prominent。　She　allowed；　with　apparent　indifference；　certain　scattered

hairs；　once　brown；　to　grow　upon　her　chin。　Her　thin　lips　scarcely

covered　teeth　that　were　too　long；　though　still　quite　white。　Her

complexion　was　dark；　and　her　hair；　originally　black；　had　turned　gray

from　frightful　headaches；a　misfortune　which　obliged　her　to　wear　a

false　front。　Not　knowing　how　to　put　it　on　so　as　to　conceal　the

junction　between　the　real　and　the　false；　there　were　often　little　gaps

between　the　border　of　her　cap　and　the　black　string　with　which　this

semi…wig　（always　badly　curled）　was　fastened　to　her　head。　Her　gown；

silk　in　summer；　merino　in　winter；　and　always　brown　in　color；　was

invariably　rather　tight　for　her　angular　figure　and　thin　arms。　Her

collar；　limp　and　bent；　exposed　too　much　the　red　skin　of　a　neck　which

was　ribbed　like　an　oak…leaf　in　winter　seen　in　the　light。　Her　origin

explains　to　some　extent　the　defects　of　her　conformation。　She　was　the

daughter　of　a　wood…merchant；　a　peasant；　who　had　risen　from　the　ranks。

She　might　have　been　plump　at　eighteen；　but　no　trace　remained　of　the

fair　complexion　and　pretty　color　of　which　she　was　wont　to　boast。　The

tones　of　her　flesh　had　taken　the　pallid　tints　so　often　seen　in

〃devotes。〃　Her　aquiline　nose　was　the　feature　that　chiefly　proclaimed

the　despotism　of　her　nature；　and　the　flat　shape　of　her　forehead　the

narrowness　of　her　mind。　Her　movements　had　an　odd　abruptness　which

precluded　all　grace；　the　mere　motion　with　which　she　twitched　her

handkerchief　from　her　bag　and　blew　her　nose　with　a　loud　noise　would

have　shown　her　character　and　habits　to　a　keen　observer。　Being　rather

tall；　she　held　herself　very　erect；　and　justified　the　remark　of　a

naturalist　who　once　explained　the　peculiar　gait　of　old　maids　by

declaring　that　their　joints　were　consolidating。　When　she　walked　her

movements　were　not　equally　distributed　over　her　whole　person；　as　they

are　in　other　women；　producing　those　graceful　undulations　which　are　so

attractive。　She　moved；　so　to　speak；　in　a　single　block；　seeming　to

advance　at　each　step　like　the　statue　of　the　Commendatore。　When　she

felt　in　good　humour　she　was　apt；　like　other　old　maids；　to　tell　of　the

chances　she　had　had　to　marry；　and　of　her　fortunate　discovery　in　time

of　the　want　of　means　of　her　lovers；proving；　unconsciously；　that　her

worldly　judgment　was　better　than　her　heart。



This　typical　figure　of　the　genus　Old　Maid　was　well　framed　by　the

grotesque　designs；　representing　Turkish　landscapes；　on　a　varnished

paper　which　decorated　the　walls　of　the　dining…room。　Mademoiselle

Gamard　usually　sat　in　this　room；　which　boasted　of　two　pier　tables　and

a　barometer。　Before　the　chair　of　each　abbe　was　a　little　cushion

covered　with　worsted　work；　the　colors　of　which　were　faded。　The　salon

in　which　she　received　company　was　worthy　of　its　mistress。　It　will　be

visible　to　the　eye　at　once　when　we　state　that　it　went　by　the　name　of

the　〃yellow　salon。〃　The　curtains　were　yellow；　the　furniture　and　walls

yellow；　on　the　mantelpiece；　surmounted　by　a　mirror　in　a　gilt　frame；

the　candlesticks　and　a　clock　all　of　crystal　struck　the　eye　with　sharp

brilliancy。　As　to　the　private　apartment　of　Mademoiselle　Gamard；　no　one

had　ever　been　permitted　to　look　into　it。　Conjecture　alone　suggested

that　it　was　full　of　odds　and　ends；　worn…out　furniture；　and　bits　of

stuff　and　pieces　dear　to　the　hearts　of　all　old　maids。



Such　was　the　woman　destined　to　exert　a　vast　influence　on　the　last

years　of　the　Abbe　Birotteau。



For　want　of　exercising　in　nature's　own　way　the　activity　bestowed　upon

women；　and　yet　impelled　to　spend　it　in　some　way　or　other；　Mademoiselle

Gamard　had　acquired　the　habit　of　using　it　in　petty　intrigues；

provincial　cabals；　and　those　self…seeking　schemes　which　occupy；　sooner

or　later；　the　lives　of　all　old　maids。　Birotteau；　unhappily；　had

developed　in　Sophie　Gamard　the　only　sentiments　which　it　was　possible

for　that　poor　creature　to　feel；those　of　hatred；　a　passion　hitherto

latent　under　the　calmness　and　monotony　of　provincial　life；　but　which

was　now　to　become　the　more　intense　because　it　was　spent　on　petty

things　and　in　the　midst　of　a　narrow　sphere。　Birotteau　was　one　of　those

beings　who　are　predestined　to　suffer　because；　being　unable　to　see

things；　they　cannot　avoid　them；　to　them　the　worst　happens。



〃Yes；　it　will　be　a　fine　day；〃　replied　the　canon；　after　a　pause；

apparently　issuing　from　a　revery　and　wishing　to　conform　to　the　rules

of　politeness。



Birotteau；　frightened　at　the　length　of　time　which　had　elapsed　between

the　question　and　the　answer；for　he　had；　for　the　first　time　in　his

life；　taken　his　coffee　without　uttering　a　word；now　left　the　dining…

room　where　his　heart　was　squeezed　as　if　in　a　vise。　Feeling　that　the

coffee　lay　heavy　on　his　stomach；　he　went　to　walk　in　a　sad　mood　among

the　narrow；　box…edged　garden　paths　which　outlined　a　star　in　the　little

garden。　As　he　turned　after　making　the　first　round；　he　saw　Mademoiselle

Gamard　and　the　Abbe　Troubert　standing　stock…still　and　silent　on　the

threshold　of　the　door；he　with　his　arms　folded　and　motionless　like　a

statue　on　a　tomb；　she　leaning　against　the　blind　door。　Both　seemed　to

be　gazing　at　him　and　counting　his　steps。　Nothing　is　so　embarrassing　to

a　creature　naturally　timid　as　to　feel　itself　the　object　of　a　close

examination；　and　if　that　is　made　by　the　eyes　of　hatred；　the　sort　of

suffering　it　causes　is　changed　into　intolerable　martyrdom。



Presently　Birotteau　fancied　he　was　preventing　Mademoiselle　Gamard　and

the　abbe　from　walking　in　the　narrow　path。　That　idea；　inspired　equally

by　fear　and　kindness；　became　so　strong　that　he　left　the　garden　and

went　to　the　church；　thinking　no　longer　of　his　canonry；　so　absorbed　was

he　by　the　disheartening　tyranny　of　the　old　maid。　Luckily　for　him　he

happened　to　find　much　to　do　at　Saint…Gatien；several　funerals；　a

marriage；　and　two　baptisms。　Thus　employed　he　forgot　his　griefs。　When

his　stomach　told　him　that　dinner　was　ready　he　drew　out　his　watch　and

saw；　not　without　alarm；　that　it　was　some　minutes　after　four。　Being

well　aware　of　Mademoiselle　Gamard's　punctuality；　he　hurried　back　to

the　house。



He　saw　at　once　on　passing　the　kitchen　door　that　the　first　course　had

been　removed。　When　he　reached　the　dining…room　the　old　maid　said；　with

a　tone　of　voice　in　which　were　mingled　sour　rebuke　and　joy　at　being

able　to　blame　him：



〃It　is　half…past　four；　Monsieur　Birotteau。　You　know　we　are　not　to　wait

for　you。〃



The　vicar　looked　at　the　clock　in　the　dining…room；　and　saw　at　once