the dust- 第29部分

She　blushed。　　〃I'll　admit　I　don't　like　it。　　I'm　not　jealousbut　I　wish　you　weren't　doing　it。〃

〃So　do　I！〃　he　exclaimed；　with　sudden　energy　that　astonished　and　disquieted　her。　　〃So　do　I！　　But　since　it　can't　be　helped　I　shall　go　on。〃

Never　had　she　respected　him　so　profoundly。　　For　the　first　time　she　had　measured　strength　with　him　and　had　been　beaten　and　routed。　　She　fancied　herself　enormously　proud；　for　she　labored　under　the　common　delusion　which　mistakes　for　pride　the　silly　vanity　of　class；　or　birth；　or　wealth；　or　position。　　She　had　imagined　she　would　never　lower　that　cherished　pride　of　hers　to　any　man。　　And　she　had　lowered　it　into　the　dust。　　No　wonder　women　had　loved　him；　she　said　to　herself；　couldn't　he　do　with　them；　even　the　haughtiest　of　them；　precisely　as　he　pleased？　　He　had　not　tried　to　calm；　much　less　to　end　her　jealousy；　on　the　contrary；　he　had　let　it　flame　as　high　as　it　would；　had　urged　it　higher。　　And　she　did　not　dare　ask　him；　even　as　a　loving　concession　to　her　weakness；　to　give　up　an　affair　upon　which　everybody　was　putting　the　natural　worst　possible　construction！　On　the　contrary；　she　had　given　him　leave　to　go　on　because　she　fearedyes；　knewthat　if　she　tried　to　interfere　he　would　take　it　as　evidence　that　they　could　not　get　on　together。　　What　a　man！


But　there　was　more　to　come　that　day。　　As　he　was　finishing　dressing　for　dinner　his　sister　Ursula　knocked。　〃May　I　come；　Frederick？〃　she　said。

〃Sure；〃　he　cried。　　〃I'm　fixing　my　tie。〃

Ursula；　in　a　gown　that　displayed　the　last　possible　many　of　the　homelier　women　said　impossibleinch　of　her　beautiful　shoulders；　came　strolling　sinuously　in　and　seated　herself　on　the　arm　of　the　divan。　　She　watched　him；　in　his　evening　shirt；　as　he　with　much　struggling　did　his　tie。　　〃How　young　you　do　look；　Fred！〃　said　she。　　〃Especially　in　just　that　much　clothes。　　Not　a　day　over　thirty。〃

〃I'm　not　exactly　a　nonogenarian；〃　retorted　he。

〃But　usually　your　facein　spite　of　its　smoothness　and　no　wrinkleshas　a　kind　of　an　old　youngor　do　I　mean　young　old？look。　　You've　led　such　a　serious　life。〃

〃Um。　　That's　the　devil　of　it。〃

〃You're　looking　particularly　young　to…night。〃

〃Same　to　you；　Urse。〃

〃No；　I'm　not　bad　for　thirty…four。　　People　half　believe　me　when　I　say　I'm　twenty…nine。〃　　She　glanced　complacently　down　at　her　softly　glistening　shoulders。　〃I've　still　got　my　skin。〃

〃And　a　mighty　good　one　it　is。　　Best　I　ever　saw　except　one。〃

She　reflected　a　moment；　then　smiled。　　〃I　know　it　isn't　Josephine's。　　Hers　is　good　but　not　notable。　　Eyes　and　teeth　are　her　strongholds。　　I　suppose　it'sthe　other　lady's。〃

〃Exactly。〃

〃I　mean　the　one　in　Jersey　City。〃

He　went　on　brushing　his　hair　with　not　a　glance　at　the　bomb　she　had　exploded　under　his　very　nose。

〃You're　a　cool　one；〃　she　said　admiringly。

〃Cool？〃

〃I　thought　you'd　jump。　　I'm　sure　you　never　dreamed　I　knew。〃

He　slid　into　his　white　waistcoat　and　began　to　button　it。

〃Though　you　might　know　I'd　find　out；〃　she　went　on；　〃when　everyone's　talking。〃

〃Everyone's　always　talking；〃　said　he　indifferently。

〃And　they　rattle　on　to　beat　the　band　when　they　get　a　chance　at　a　man　like　you。　　Do　you　know　what　they're　saying？〃

〃Certainly。　　Loosen　these　straps　in　the　back　of　my　waistcoatthe　upper　ones；　won't　you？〃

As　she　fussed　with　the　buckles　she　said：　　〃But　you　don't　know　that　they　say　you're　going　to　pieces　neglecting　your　caseskeeping　away　from　your　office　wasting　about　half　of　your　day　with　your　lady　love。　They　say　that　you　have　gone　stark　madthat　you　are　rushing　to　ruin。〃

〃A　little　looser。　　That's　better。　　Thanks。〃

〃And　everyone's　wondering　when　Josephine　will　hear　and　go　on　the　rampage。　　She's　so　proud　and　so　stuck　on　herself　that　they're　betting　she'll　give　you　the　bounce。〃

〃Well〃　getting　into　his　coat〃you'd　delight　in　that。　　For　you　don't　like　her。〃

〃Ohsoso；〃　replied　Ursula。　　〃She's　all　right；　as　women　go。　　You　know　we　women　don't　ever　think　any　too　well　of　each　other。　　We're　‘on。'　　Now；　I'm　frank　to　admit　I'm　not　worth　the　powder　to　blow　me　up。　　I　can't　do　anything　worth　doing。　　I　don't　know　anything　worth　knowingexcept　how　to　dress　and　make　a　fool　of　an　occasional　man。　　I'm　not　a　good　house…　keeper；　nor　a　good　wifeand　I'd　as　lief　go　to　jail　for　two　years　as　have　a　baby。　　But　I　admit　I'm　n。　g。　Most　women　are　as　poor　excuses　as　I　am；　yet　they　think　they're　GRAND！〃

Norman；　standing　before　his　sister　and　smiling　mysteriously；　said：　　〃My　dear　Urse；　let　me　give　you　a　great　truth　in　a　sentence。　　The　value　of　anything　is　not　its　value　to　itself　or　in　itself；　but　its　value　to　some　one　else。　A　womaneven　as　incompetent　a　person　as　you〃

〃Or　Josephine。〃

〃or　Josephinemay　seem　to　some　man　to　be　pricelessly　valuable。　　And　if　she　happens　to　seem　so　to　him；　why；　she　IS　so。〃

〃MeaningJersey　City？〃

His　eyes　glittered　curiously。　　〃Meaning　Jersey　City；〃　he　said。

A　long　silence。　　Then　Ursula：　　〃But　suppose　Josephine　hears？〃

He　stood　beside　the　doorway；　waiting　for　her　to　pass　out。　　His　face　expressed　nothing。　　〃Let's　go　down。　　I'm　hungry。　　We　were　talking　about　it　this　afternoon。〃

〃You　and　Jo！〃

〃Josephine　and　I。〃

〃And　it's　all　right？〃

〃Why　not？〃

〃You　fooled　her？〃

〃I　don't　stoop　to　that　sort　of　thing。〃

〃No；　indeed；〃　she　laughed。　　〃You　rise　to　heights　of　deception　that　would　make　anyone　else　giddy。　　Oh；　I'd　give　anything　to　have　heard。〃

〃There's　nothing　to　deceive　about；〃　said　he。

She　shook　her　head。　　〃You　can't　put　it　over　me；　Fred。　　You've　never　before　made　a　fool　of　yourself　about　a　woman。　　I'd　like　to　see　her。　　I　suppose　I'd　be　amazed。　　I've　observed　that　the　women　who　do　the　most　extraordinary　things　with　men　are　the　most　ordinary　sort　of　women。〃

〃Not　to　the　men；〃　said　he　bitterly。　　〃Not　while　they're　doing　it。〃

〃Does　SHE　seem　extraordinary　to　YOU　still？〃

He　thrust　his　hands　deep　in　his　pockets。　　〃What　you　heard　is　true。　　I'm　letting　everything　slidework　careereverything。　　I　think　of　nothing　else。　　Ursula；　I'm　mad　about　hermad！〃

She　threw　back　her　head；　looked　at　him　admiringly。　Never　had　she　so　utterly　worshiped　this　wonderful；　powerful　brother　of　hers。　　He　was　in　lovereally　madly　in　loveat　last。　　So　he　was　perfect！　　〃How　long　do　you　think　it　will　hold；　Fred？〃　she　said；　all　sympathy。

〃God　knows！〃

〃Yetcaring　for　her　you　can　go　on　and　marry　another　woman！〃

He　looked　at　his　sister　cynically。　　〃You　wouldn't　have　me　marry　HER；　would　you？〃

〃Of　course　not；〃　protested　she　hastily。　　Her　passion　for　romance　did　not　carry　her　to　that　idiocy。　〃You　couldn't。　　She's　a　sort　of　working　girlisn't　she？anyhow；　that　class。　　No；　you　couldn't　marry　her。　　But　how　can　you　marry　another　woman？〃

〃How　could　I　give　up　Josephine？and　give　her　up　probably　to　Bob　Culver？〃

Ursula　nodded　understandingly。　　〃Butwhat　are　you　going　to　do？〃

〃How　should　I　know？　　Perhaps　break　it　off　when　I　marryif　you　can　call　it　breaking　off；　when　there's　nothing　to　break　butme。〃

〃You　don't　mean〃　she　cried；　stopping　when　her　tone　had　carried　her　meaning。

He　laughed。　　〃Yesthat's　the　kind　of　damn　fool　I've　been。〃

〃You　must　have　let　her　see　how　crazy　you　were　about　her。〃

〃Was　anyone　ever　able　to　hide　that　sort　of　insanity？〃

Ursula　gazed　wonderingly　at　him；　drew　a　long　breath。　　〃You！〃　she　exclaimed。　　〃Of　all　menyou！〃

〃Let's　go　down。〃

〃She　must　be　a　deep　onedangerous；〃　said　Ursula；　furious　against　the　woman　who　was　daring　to　resist　her　matchless　brother。　　〃Fred；　I'm　wild　to　see　her。　　Maybe　I'd　see　something　that'd　help　cure　you。〃

〃You　keep　out　of　it；〃　he　replied；　curtly　but　not　with　ill　humor。

〃It　can't　last　long。〃

〃It'd　do　for　me；　if　it　did。〃

〃The　marriage　will　settle　everything；〃　said　Ursula　with　confidence。

〃It's　got　to；〃　said　he　grimly。



XI


THE　next　day　or　the　next　but　one　Dorothy　telephoned　him。　　He　often　called　her　up　on　one　pretext　or　another；　or　frankly　for　no　reason　at　all　beyond　the　overwhelming　desire　to　hear　her　voice。　　But　she　had　never　before　〃disturbed〃　him。　　He　had　again　and　again　assured　her　that　he　would　not　regard　himself　as　〃disturbed；〃　no　matter　what　he　might　be　doing。　　She　would　not　have　it　so。　　As　he　was　always　watching　for　some　faint　sign　that　she　was　really　interested　in　him；　this　call　gave　him　a　thrill　of　hopea　specimen　of　the　minor　absurdities　of　those　days　of　extravagant　folly。

〃Are　you　coming　over　to…day？〃　she　asked。

〃Right　away；　if　you　wish。〃

〃Oh；　no。　　Any　time　will　do。〃

〃I'll　come　at　once。　　I'm　not　busy。〃

〃No。　　Late　this　afternoon。　　Father　asked　me　to　call　up　and　make　sure。　　He　wants　to　see　you。〃

〃Ohnot　you？〃

〃I'm　a　business　person；〃　retorted　she。　　〃I　know　better　than　to　annoy　you；　as　I've　often　said。〃

He　knew　it　was　foolish；　tiresome；　yet　he　could　not　resist　the　impulse　to　say；　〃Now　that　I've　heard　your　voice　I　can't　stay　away。　　I'll　come　over　to　lunch。〃

Her　answering　voice　was　irritated。　　〃Please　don't。　I'm　cleaning　house。　　You'd　be　in　the　way。〃

He　shrank　and　quivered　like　a　boy　who　has　been　publicly　rebuked。　　〃I'll　come　when　you　say；〃　he　replied。

〃Not　a　minute　before　four　o'clock。〃

〃That's　a　long　timenow　you've　made　me　crazy　to　see　you。〃

〃Don't　talk　nonsense。　　I　must　go　back　to　work。〃

〃What　are　you　doing？〃　he　asked；　to　detain　her。

〃Dusting　and　polishing。　　Molly　did　the　sweeping　and　is　cleaning　windows　now。〃

〃What　have　you　got　on？〃

〃How　silly　you　are！〃

〃No　one　knows　that　better　than　I。　　But　I　want　to　have　a　picture　of　you　to　look　at。〃

〃I've　got　on　an　old　white　skirt　and　an　old　shirt　waist；　both　dirty；　and　a　pair　of　tennis　shoes　that　were　white　once　but　are　gray　now；　where　they　aren't　black。　And　I've　got　a　pink　chiffon　rag　tied　round　my　hair。〃

〃Pink　is　wonderful　when　you　wear　it。〃

〃I　look　a　fright。　　And　my　face　is　streakedand　my　arms。〃

〃Oh；　you've　got　your　sleeves　rolled　up。　　That's　an　important　detail。〃

〃You're　making　fun　of　me。〃

〃No；　I'm　thinking　of　your　arms。　　They　are　ravishing。〃

〃That's　quite　enough。　　Good…by。〃

And　she　rang　off。　　He　was　used　to　her　treating　compliment　and　flattery　from　him　in　that　fashion。　　He　could　notor　was　it　would　not？understand　why。　　He　had　learned　that　she　was　not　at　all　the　indifferent　and　unaware　person　in　the　matter　of　her　physical　charms　he　had　at　first　fancied　her。　　On　the　contrary；　she　had　more　than　her　share　of　physical　vanitynot　more　th