robert falconer- 第24部分

worldfor　men　as　men。　　Lord　Christ！　not　alone　from　the　pains　of

hell；　or　of　consciencenot　alone　from　the　outer　darkness　of　self

and　all　that　is　mean　and　poor　and　low；　do　we　fly　to　thee；　but　from

the　anger　that　arises　within　us　at　the　wretched　words　spoken　in　thy

name；　at　the　degradation　of　thee　and　of　thy　Father　in　the　mouths　of

those　that　claim　especially　to　have　found　thee；　do　we　seek　thy　feet。

Pray　thou　for　them　also；　for　they　know　not　what　they　do。









CHAPTER　XIV。



MARY　ST。　　JOHN。



After　this；　day　followed　day　in　calm；　dull　progress。　　Robert　did　not

care　for　the　games　through　which　his　school…fellows　forgot　the

little　they　had　to　forget；　and　had　therefore　few　in　any　sense　his

companions。　　So　he　passed　his　time　out　of　school　in　the　society　of

his　grandmother　and　Shargar；　except　that　spent　in　the　garret；　and

the　few　hours　a　week　occupied　by　the　lessons　of　the　shoemaker。　　For

he　went　on；　though　half…heartedly；　with　those　lessons；　given　now

upon　Sandy's　redeemed　violin　which　he　called　his　old　wife；　and　made

a　little　progress　even；　as　we　sometimes　do　when　we　least　think　it。



He　took　more　and　more　to　brooding　in　the　garret；　and　as　more

questions　presented　themselves　for　solution；　he　became　more　anxious

to　arrive　at　the　solution；　and　more　uneasy　as　he　failed　in

satisfying　himself　that　he　had　arrived　at　it；　so　that　his　brain；

which　needed　quiet　for　the　true　formation　of　its　substance；　as　a

cooling　liquefaction　or　an　evaporating　solution　for　the　just

formation　of　its　crystals；　became　in　danger　of　settling　into　an

abnormal　arrangement　of　the　cellular　deposits。



I　believe　that　even　the　new…born　infant　is；　in　some　of　his　moods；

already　grappling　with　the　deepest　metaphysical　problems；　in　forms

infinitely　too　rudimental　for　the　understanding　of　the　grown

philosopheras　far；　in　fact；　removed　from　his　ken　on　the　one　side；

that　of　intelligential　beginning；　the　germinal　subjective；　as　his

abstrusest　speculations　are　from　the　final　solutions　of　absolute

entity　on　the　other。　　If　this　be　the　case；　it　is　no　wonder　that　at

Robert's　age　the　deepest　questions　of　his　coming　manhood　should　be

in　active　operation；　although　so　surrounded　with　the　yoke　of　common

belief　and　the　shell　of　accredited　authority；　that　the　embryo　faith；

which　in　minds　like　his　always　takes　the　form　of　doubt；　could　not　be

defined　any　more　than　its　existence　could　be　disproved。　　I　have

given　a　hint　at　the　tendency　of　his　mind　already；　in　the　fact　that

one　of　the　most　definite　inquiries　to　which　he　had　yet　turned　his

thoughts　was；　whether　God　would　have　mercy　upon　a　repentant　devil。

An　ordinary　puzzle　had　beenif　his　father　were　to　marry　again；　and

it　should　turn　out　after　all　that　his　mother　was　not　dead；　what　was

his　father　to　do？　　But　this　was　over　now。　　A　third　was；　why；　when　he

came　out　of　church；　sunshine　always　made　him　miserable；　and　he　felt

better　able　to　be　good　when　it　rained　or　snowed　hard。　　I　might

mention　the　inquiry　whether　it　was　not　possible　somehow　to　elude　the

omniscience　of　God；　but　that　is　a　common　question　with　thoughtful

children；　and　indicates　little　that　is　characteristic　of　the

individual。　　That　he　puzzled　himself　about　the　perpetual　motion　may

pass　for　little　likewise；　but　one　thing　which　is　worth　mentioning；

for　indeed　it　caused　him　considerable　distress；　was；　that　in　reading

the　Paradise　Lost　he　could　not　help　sympathizing　with　Satan；　and

feelingI　do　not　say　thinkingthat　the　Almighty　was　pompous；

scarcely　reasonable；　and　somewhat　revengeful。



He　was　recognized　amongst　his　school…fellows　as　remarkable　for　his

love　of　fair…play；　so　much　so；　that　he　was　their　constant　referee。

Add　to　this　that；　notwithstanding　his　sympathy　with　Satan；　he

almost　invariably　sided　with　his　master；　in　regard　of　any　angry

reflection　or　seditious　movement；　and　even　when　unjustly　punished

himself；　the　occasional　result　of　a　certain　backwardness　in

self…defence；　never　showed　any　resentmenta　most　improbable

statement；　I　admit；　but　nevertheless　trueand　I　think　the　rest　of

his　character　may　be　left　to　the　gradual　dawn　of　its　historical

manifestation。



He　had　long　ere　this　discovered　who　the　angel　was　that　had　appeared

to　him　at　the　top　of　the　stair　upon　that　memorable　night；　but　he

could　hardly　yet　say　that　he　had　seen　her；　for；　except　one　dim

glimpse　he　had　had　of　her　at　the　window　as　he　passed　in　the　street；

she　had　not　appeared　to　him　save　in　the　vision　of　that　night。

During　the　whole　winter　she　scarcely　left　the　house；　partly　from

the　state　of　her　health；　affected　by　the　sudden　change　to　a　northern

climate；　partly　from　the　attention　required　by　her　aunt；　to　aid　in

nursing　whom　she　had　left　the　warmer　south。　　Indeed；　it　was　only　to

return　the　visits　of　a　few　of　Mrs。　Forsyth's　chosen；　that　she　had

crossed　the　threshold　at　all；　and　those　visits　were　paid　at　a　time

when　all　such　half…grown　inhabitants　as　Robert　were　gathered　under

the　leathery　wing　of　Mr。　Innes。



But　long　before　the　winter　was　over；　Rothieden　had　discovered　that

the　stranger；　the　English　lady；　Mary　St。　John；　outlandish；　almost

heathenish　as　her　lovely　name　sounded　in　its　ears；　had　a　power　as

altogether　strange　and　new　as　her　name。　　For　she　was　not　only　an

admirable　performer　on　the　pianoforte；　but　such　a　simple　enthusiast

in　music；　that　the　man　must　have　had　no　music　or　little　heart　in　him

in　whom　her　playing　did　not　move　all　that　there　was　of　the　deepest。



Occasionally　there　would　be　quite　a　small　crowd　gathered　at　night　by

the　window　of　Mrs。　Forsyth's　drawing…room；　which　was　on　the

ground…floor；　listening　to　music　such　as　had　never　before　been　heard

in　Rothieden。　　More　than　once；　when　Robert　had　not　found　Sandy

Elshender　at　home　on　the　lesson…night；　and　had　gone　to　seek　him；　he

had　discovered　him　lying　in　wait；　like　a　fowler；　to　catch　the　sweet

sounds　that　flew　from　the　opened　cage　of　her　instrument。　　He　leaned

against　the　wall　with　his　ear　laid　over　the　edge；　and　as　near　the

window　as　he　dared　to　put　it；　his　rough　face；　gnarled　and　blotched；

and　hirsute　with　the　stubble　of　neglected　beardhis　whole　ursine

face　transfigured　by　the　passage　of　the　sweet　sounds　through　his

chaotic　brain；　which　they　swept　like　the　wind　of　God；　when　of　old　it

moved　on　the　face　of　the　waters　that　clothed　the　void　and　formless

world。



'Haud　yer　tongue！'　he　would　say　in　a　hoarse　whisper；　when　Robert

sought　to　attract　his　attention；　'haud　yer　tongue；　man；　and　hearken。

Gin　yon　bonny　leddy　'at　yer　grannie　keeps　lockit　up　i'　the　aumry

war　to　tak　to　the　piano；　that's　jist　hoo　she　wad　play。　　Lord；　man！

pit　yer　sowl　i'　yer　lugs；　an'　hearken。'



The　soutar　was　all　wrong　in　this；　for　if　old　Mr。　Falconer's　violin

had　taken　woman…shape；　it　would　have　been　that　of　a　slight；　worn；

swarthy　creature；　with　wild　black　eyes；　great　and　restless；　a　voice

like　a　bird's；　and　thin　fingers　that　clawed　the　music　out　of　the

wires　like　the　quills　of　the　old　harpsichord；　not　that　of　Mary　St。

John；　who　was　tall；　and　could　not　help　being　stately；　was　large　and

well…fashioned；　as　full　of　repose　as　Handel's　music；　with　a

contralto　voice　to　make　you　weep；　and　eyes　that　would　have　seemed

but　for　their　maidenliness　to　be　always　ready　to　fold　you　in　their

lucid　gray　depths。



Robert　stared　at　the　soutar；　doubting　at　first　whether　he　had　not

been　drinking。　　But　the　intoxication　of　music　produces　such　a

different　expression　from　that　of　drink；　that　Robert　saw　at　once

that　if　he　had　indeed　been　drinking；　at　least　the　music　had　got

above　the　drink。　　As　long　as　the　playing　went　on；　Elshender　was　not

to　be　moved　from　the　window。



But　to　many　of　the　people　of　Rothieden　the　music　did　not　recommend

the　musician；　for　every　sort　of　music；　except　the　most　unmusical　of

psalm…singing；　was　in　their　minds　of　a　piece　with　'dancin'　an'

play…actin'；　an'　ither　warldly　vainities　an'　abominations。'　　And

Robert；　being　as　yet　more　capable　of　melody　than　harmony；　grudged　to

lose　a　lesson　on　Sandy's　'auld　wife　o'　a　fiddle'　for　any　amount　of

Miss　St。　John's　playing。









CHAPTER　XV。



ERIC　ERICSON。



One　gusty　eveningit　was　of　the　last　day　in　MarchRobert　well

remembered　both　the　date　and　the　daya　bleak　wind　was　driving　up

the　long　street　of　the　town；　and　Robert　was　standing　looking　out　of

one　of　the　windows　in　the　gable…room。　　The　evening　was　closing　into

night。　　He　hardly　knew　how　he　came　to　he　there；　but　when　he　thought

about　it　he　found　it　was　play…Wednesday；　and　that　he　had　been　all

the　half…holiday　trying　one　thing　after　another　to　interest　himself

withhal；　but　in　vain。　　He　knew　nothing　about　east　winds；　but　not　the

less　did　this　dreary　wind　of　the　dreary　March　world　prove　itself

upon　his　soul。　　For　such　a　wind　has　a　shadow　wind　along　with　it；

that　blows　in　the　minds　of　men。　　There　was　nothing　genial；　no　growth

in　it。　　It　killed；　and　killed　most　dogmatically。　　But　it　is　an　ill

wind　that　blows　nobody　good。　　Even　an　east　wind　must　bear　some

blessing　on　its　ugly　wings。　　And　as　Robert　looked　down　from　the

gable；　the　wind　was　blowing　up　the　street　before　it　half…a…dozen

footfaring　students　from　Aberdeen；　on　their　way　home　at　the　close　of

the　session；　probably　to　the　farm…labours　of　the　spring。



This　was　a　glad　sight；　as　that　of　the　returning　storks　in　Denmark。

Robert　knew　where　they　would　put　up；　sought　his　cap；　and　went　out。

His　grandmother　never　objected　to　his　going　to　see　Miss　Napier；　it

was　in　her　house　that　the　weary　men　would　this　night　rest。



It　was　not　without　reason　that　Lord　Rothie　had　teased　his　hostess

about　receiving　foot…passengers；　for　to　such　it　was　her　invariable

custom　to　make　some　civil　excuse；　sending　Meg　or　Peggy　to　show　them

over　the　way　to　the　hostelry　next　in　rank；　a　proceeding　recognized

by　the　inferior　hostess　as　both　just　and　friendly；　for　the　good

woman　never　thought　of　measuring　The　Star　against　The　Boar's　Head。

More　than　one　comical　story　had　been　the　result