robert falconer- 第95部分

Moans　came　from　the　bed；　but　the　candle　in　a　bottle；　by　which　the

woman　was　reading；　was　so　placed　that　we　could　not　see　the　sufferer。



We　stood　still　and　did　not　interrupt　the　reading。



'Ha！　ha！　ha！'　laughed　a　coarse　voice　from　the　side　of　the　chimney：

'the　saint；　you　see；　was　no　better　than　some　of　the　rest　of　us！'



'I　think　he　was　a　good　deal　worse　just　then；'　said　Falconer；

stepping　forward。



'Gracious！　there's　Mr。　Falconer；'　said　another　woman；　rising；　and

speaking　in　a　flattering　tone。



'Then；'　remarked　the　former　speaker；　'there's　a　chance　for　old　Moll

and　me　yet。　　King　David　was　a　saint；　wasn't　he？　　Ha！　ha！'



'Yes；　and　you　might　be　one　too；　if　you　were　as　sorry　for　your　faults

as　he　was　for　his。'



'Sorry；　indeed！　　I'll　be　damned　if　I　be　sorry。　　What　have　I　to　be

sorry　for？　　Where's　the　harm　in　turning　an　honest　penny？　　I　ha'　took

no　man's　wife；　nor　murdered　himself　neither。　　There's　yer　saints！

He　was　a　rum　'un。　　Ha！　ha！'



Falconer　approached　her；　bent　down　and　whispered　something　no　one

could　hear　but　herself。　　She　gave　a　smothered　cry；　and　was　silent。



'Give　me　the　book；'　he　said；　turning　towards　the　bed。　'I'll　read　you

something　better　than　that。　　I'll　read　about　some　one　that　never　did

anything　wrong。'



'I　don't　believe　there　never　was　no　sich　a　man；'　said　the　previous

reader；　as　she　handed　him　the　book；　grudgingly。



'Not　Jesus　Christ　himself？'　said　Falconer。



'Oh！　　I　didn't　know　as　you　meant　him。'



'Of　course　I　meant　him。　　There　never　was　another。'



'I　have　heard　tellp'raps　it　was　yourself；　siras　how　he　didn't

come　down　upon　us　over　hard　after　all；　bless　him！'



Falconer　sat　down　on　the　side　of　the　bed；　and　read　the　story　of

Simon　the　Pharisee　and　the　woman　that　was　a　sinner。　　When　he　ceased；

the　silence　that　followed　was　broken　by　a　sob　from　somewhere　in　the

room。　　The　sick　woman　stopped　her　moaning；　and　said；



'Turn　down　the　leaf　there；　please；　sir。　　Lilywhite　will　read　it　to

me　when　you're　gone。'



The　some　one　sobbed　again。　　It　was　a　young　slender　girl；　with　a　face

disfigured　by　the　small…pox；　and；　save　for　the　tearful　look　it　wore；

poor　and　expressionless。　　Falconer　said　something　gentle　to　her。



'Will　he　ever　come　again？'　she　sobbed。



'Who？'　asked　Falconer。



'HimJesus　Christ。　　I've　heard　tell；　I　think；　that　he　was　to　come

again　some　day。'



'Why　do　you　ask？'



'Because'　she　said；　with　a　fresh　burst　of　tears；　which　rendered

the　words　that　followed　unintelligible。　　But　she　recovered　herself

in　a　few　moments；　and；　as　if　finishing　her　sentence；　put　her　hand　up

to　her　poor；　thin；　colourless　hair；　and　said；



'My　hair　ain't　long　enough　to　wipe　his　feet。'



'Do　you　know　what　he　would　say　to　you；　my　girl？'　　Falconer　asked。



'No。　What　would　he　say　to　me？　　He　would　speak　to　me；　would　he？'



'He　would　say：　Thy　sins　are　forgiven　thee。'



'Would　he；　though？　　Would　he？'　she　cried；　starting　up。　'Take　me　to

himtake　me　to　him。　　Oh！　　I　forgot。　　He's　dead。　　But　he　will　come

again；　won't　he？　　He　was　crucified　four　times；　you　know；　and　he　must

ha'　come　four　times　for　that。　　Would　they　crucify　him　again；　sir？'



'No；　they　wouldn't　crucify　him　nowin　England　at　least。　　They　would

only　laugh　at　him；　shake　their　heads　at　what　he　told　them；　as　much

as　to　say　it　wasn't　true；　and　sneer　and　mock　at　him　in　some　of　the

newspapers。'



'Oh　dear！　　I've　been　very　wicked。'



'But　you　won't　be　so　any　more。'



'No；　no；　no。　　I　won't；　I　won't；　I　won't。'



She　talked　hurriedly；　almost　wildly。　　The　coarse　old　woman　tapped

her　forehead　with　her　finger。　　Falconer　took　the　girl's　hand。



'What　is　your　name？'　he　said。



'Nell。'



'What　more？'



'Nothing　more。'



'Well；　Nelly；'　said　Falconer。



'How　kind　of　you　to　call　me　Nelly！'　interrupted　the　poor　girl。　'They

always　calls　me　Nell；　just。'



'Nelly；'　repeated　Falconer；　'I　will　send　a　lady　here　to…morrow　to

take　you　away　with　her；　if　you　like；　and　tell　you　how　you　must　do　to

find　Jesus。People　always　find　him　that　want　to　find　him。'



The　elderly　woman　with　the　rough　voice；　who　had　not　spoken　since　he

whispered　to　her；　now　interposed　with　a　kind　of　cowed　fierceness。



'Don't　go　putting　humbug　into　my　child's　head　now；　Mr。

Falconer'ticing　her　away　from　her　home。　　Everybody　knows　my　Nell's

been　an　idiot　since　ever　she　was　born。　　Poor　child！'



'I　ain't　your　child；'　cried　the　girl；　passionately。　'I　ain't

nobody's　child。'



'You　are　God's　child；'　said　Falconer；　who　stood　looking　on　with　his

eyes　shining；　but　otherwise　in　a　state　of　absolute　composure。



'Am　I？　　Am　I？　　You　won't　forget　to　send　for　me；　sir？'



'That　I　won't；'　he　answered。



She　turned　instantly　towards　the　woman；　and　snapped　her　fingers　in

her　face。



'I　don't　care　that　for　you；'　she　cried。　'You　dare　to　touch　me　now；

and　I'll　bite　you。'



'Come；　come；　Nelly；　you　mustn't　be　rude；'　said　Falconer。



'No；　sir；　I　won't　no　more；　leastways　to　nobody　but　she。　　It's　she

makes　me　do　all　the　wicked　things；　it　is。'



She　snapped　her　fingers　in　her　face　again；　and　then　burst　out

crying。



'She　will　leave　you　alone　now；　I　think；'　said　Falconer。　'She　knows

it　will　be　quite　as　well　for　her　not　to　cross　me。'



This　he　said　very　significantly；　as　he　turned　to　the　door；　where　he

bade　them　a　general　good…night。　　When　we　reached　the　street；　I　was

too　bewildered　to　offer　any　remark。　　Falconer　was　the　first　to

speak。



'It　always　comes　back　upon　me；　as　if　I　had　never　known　it　before；

that　women　like　some　of　those　were　of　the　first　to　understand　our

Lord。'



'Some　of　them　wouldn't　have　understood　him　any　more　than　the

Pharisee；　though。'



'I'm　not　so　sure　of　that。　　Of　course　there　are　great　differences。

There　are　good　and　bad　amongst　them　as　in　every　class。　　But　one

thing　is　clear　to　me；　that　no　indulgence　of　passion　destroys　the

spiritual　nature　so　much　as　respectable　selfishness。'



'I　am　afraid　you　will　not　get　society　to　agree　with　you；'　I　said；

foolishly。



'I　have　no　wish　that　society　should　agree　with　me；　for　if　it　did；　it

would　be　sure　to　do　so　upon　the　worst　of　principles。　　It　is　better

that　society　should　be　cruel；　than　that　it　should　call　the　horrible

thing　a　trifle：　it　would　know　nothing　between。'



Through　the　citythough　it　was　only　when　we　crossed　one　of　the　main

thoroughfares　that　I　knew　where　we　werewe　came　into　the　region　of

Bethnal　Green。　　From　house　to　house　till　it　grew　very　late；　Falconer

went；　and　I　went　with　him。　　I　will　not　linger　on　this　part　of　our

wanderings。　　Where　I　saw　only　dreadful　darkness；　Falconer　always

would　see　some　glimmer　of　light。　　All　the　people　into　whose　houses

we　went　knew　him。　　They　were　all　in　the　depths　of　poverty。　　Many　of

them　were　respectable。　　With　some　of　them　he　had　long　talks　in

private；　while　I　waited　near。　　At　length　he　said；



'I　think　we　had　better　be　going　home；　Mr。　Gordon。　　You　must　be

tired。'



'I　am；　rather；'　I　answered。　'But　it　doesn't　matter；　for　I　have

nothing　to　do　to…morrow。'



'We　shall　get　a　cab；　I　dare　say；　before　we　go　far。'



'Not　for　me。　　I　am　not　so　tired；　but　that　I　would　rather　walk；'　I

said。



'Very　well；'　he　returned。　'Where　do　you　live？'



I　told　him。



'I　will　take　you　the　nearest　way。'



'You　know　London　marvellously。'



'Pretty　well　now；'　he　answered。



We　were　somewhere　near　Leather　Lane　about　one　o'clock。　　Suddenly　we

came　upon　two　tiny　children　standing　on　the　pavement；　one　on　each

side　of　the　door　of　a　public…house。　　They　could　not　have　been　more

than　two　and　three。　　They　were　sobbing　a　littlenot　much。　　The　tiny

creatures　stood　there　awfully　awake　in　sleeping　London；　while　even

their　own　playmates　were　far　off　in　the　fairyland　of　dreams。



'This　is　the　kind　of　thing；'　I　said；　'that　makes　me　doubt　whether

there　be　a　God　in　heaven。'



'That　is　only　because　he　is　down　here；'　answered　Falconer；　'taking

such　good　care　of　us　all　that　you　can't　see　him。　　There　is　not　a

gin…palace；　or　yet　lower　hell　in　London；　in　which　a　man　or　woman　can

be　out　of　God。　The　whole　being　love；　there　is　nothing　for　you　to　set

it　against　and　judge　it　by。　　So　you　are　driven　to　fancies。'



The　house　was　closed；　but　there　was　light　above　the　door。　　We　went

up　to　the　children；　and　spoke　to　them；　but　all　we　could　make　out　was

that　mammie　was　in　there。　　One　of　them　could　not　speak　at　all。

Falconer　knocked　at　the　door。　　A　good…natured…looking　Irishwoman

opened　it　a　little　way　and　peeped　out。



'Here　are　two　children　crying　at　your　door；　ma'am；'　said　Falconer。



'Och；　the　darlin's！　they　want　their　mother。'



'Do　you　know　her；　then？'



'True　for　you；　and　I　do。　　She's　a　mighty　dacent　woman　in　her　way

when　the　drink's　out　uv　her；　and　very　kind　to　the　childher；　but

oncet　she　smells　the　dhrop　o'　gin；　her　head's　gone　intirely。　　The

purty　craytures　have　waked　up；　an'　she　not　come　home；　and　they've

run　out　to　look　after　her。'



Falconer　stood　a　moment　as　if　thinking　what　would　be　best。　　The

shriek　of　a　woman　rang　through　the　night。



'There　she　is！'　said　the　Irishwoman。　'For　God's　sake　don't　let　her

get　a　hould　o'　the　darlints。　　She's　ravin'　mad。　　I　seen　her　try　to

kill　them　oncet。'



The　shrieks　came　nearer　and　nearer；　and　after　a　few　moments　the

woman　appeared　in　the　moonlight；　tossing　her　arms　over　her　head；　and

screaming　with　a　despair　for　which　she　yet　sought　a　defiant

expression。　　Her　head　was　uncovered；　and　her　hair　flying　in　tangles；

her　sleeves　were　torn；　and　her　gaunt　arms　looked　awful　in　the

moonlight。　　She　stood　in　the　middle　of　the　street；　crying　again　and

again；　with　shrill　laughter　between；　'Nobody　cares　for　me；　and　I

care　for　nobody！　　Ha！　ha！　ha！'



'Mammie！　mammie！'　cried　the　elder　of　the　children；　and　ran　towards

her。



The　woman　heard；　and　rushed　like　a　fury　towards　the　child。　　Falconer

too　ran；　and　caught　up　the　child。　　The