f； look in upon us feeding with the dogs and； like dogs； on flesh； was one which greatly troubled my mind。〃
He glanced at me in his usual quick； cunning way。
〃Ah； senor； you have that feeling tooafter so short a time with us！ Consider； then； what it must be for me； unable to nourish myself on gums and fruitlets； and that little sweetness made by wasps out of flowers； when I am compelled to go far away and eat secretly to avoid giving offence。〃
It was hard； no doubt； but I did not pity him； secretly I could only feel anger against him for refusing to enlighten me； while making such a presence of openness； and I also felt disgusted with myself for having joined him in his rank repast。 But dissimulation was necessary； and so； after conversing a little more on indifferent topics； and thanking him for his hospitality； I left him alone to go on with his smoky task。
On my way back to the lodge； fearing that some taint of Nuflo's evil…smelling den and dinner might still cling to me； I turned aside to where a streamlet in the wood widened and formed a deep pool； to take a plunge in the water。 After drying myself in the air； and thoroughly ventilating my garments by shaking and beating them； I found an open； shady spot in the wood and threw myself on the grass to wait for evening before returning to the house。 By that time the sweet； warm air would have purified me。 Besides； I did not consider that I had sufficiently punished Rima for her treatment of me。 She would be anxious for my safety； perhaps even looking for me everywhere in the wood。 It was not much to make her suffer one day after she had made me miserable for three； and perhaps when she discovered that I could exist without her society she would begin to treat me less capriciously。
So ran my thoughts as I rested on the warm ground； gazing up into the foliage； green as young grass in the lower； shady parts； and above luminous with the bright sunlight； and full of the murmuring sounds of insect life。 My every action； word； thought； had my feeling for Rima as a motive。 Why； I began to ask myself； was Rima so much to me？ It was easy to answer that question： Because nothing so exquisite had ever been created。 All the separate and fragmentary beauty and melody and graceful motion found scattered throughout nature were concentrated and harmoniously combined in her。 How various； how luminous； how divine she was！ A being for the mind to marvel at； to admire continually； finding some new grace and charm every hour； every moment； to add to the old。 And there was； besides； the fascinating mystery surrounding her origin to arouse and keep my interest in her continually active。
That was the easy answer I returned to the question I had asked myself。 But I knew that there was another answera reason more powerful than the first。 And I could no longer thrust it back； or hide its shining face with the dull； leaden mask of mere intellectual curiosity。 BECAUSE I LOVED HER； loved her as I had never loved before； never could love any other being； with a passion which had caught something of her own brilliance and intensity； making a former passion look dim and commonplace in comparisona feeling known to everyone； something old and worn out； a weariness even to think of。
From these reflections I was roused by the plaintive three…syllable call of an evening birda nightjar common in these woods； and was surprised to find that the sun had set； and the woods already shadowed with the twilight。 I started up and began hurriedly walking homewards； thinking of Rima； and was consumed with impatience to see her； and as I drew near to the house； walking along a narrow path which I knew； I suddenly met her face to face。 Doubtless she had heard my approach； and instead of shrinking out of the path and allowing me to pass on without seeing her； as she would have done on the previous day； she had sprung forward to meet me。 I was struck with wonder at the change in her as she came with a swift； easy motion； like a flying bird； her hands outstretched as if to clasp mine； her lips parted in a radiant； welcoming smile； her eyes sparkling with joy。
I started forward to meet her； but had no sooner touched her hands than her countenance changed； and she shrunk back trembling； as if the touch had chilled her warm blood； and moving some feet away； she stood with downcast eyes； pale and sorrowful as she had seemed yesterday。 In vain I implored her to tell me the cause of this change and of the trouble she evidently felt； her lips trembled as if with speech； but she made no reply； and only shrunk further away when I attempted to approach her； and at length； moving aside from the path； she was lost to sight in the dusky leafage。
I went on alone； and sat outside for some time； until old Nuflo returned from his hunting； and only after he had gone in and had made the fire burn up did Rima make her appearance； silent and constrained as ever。
CHAPTER X
On the following day Rima continued in the same inexplicable humour； and feeling my defeat keenly； I determined once more to try the effect of absence on her； and to remain away on this occasion for a longer period。 Like old Nuflo； I was secret in going forth next morning； waiting until the girl was out of the way； then slipping off among the bushes into the deeper wood； and finally quitting its shelter； I set out across the savannah towards my old quarters。 Great was my surprise on arriving at the village to find no person there。 At first I imagined that my disappearance in the forest of evil fame had caused them to abandon their home in a panic； but on looking round I concluded that my friends had only gone on one of their periodical visits to some neighbouring village。 For when these Indians visit their neighbours they do it in a very thorough manner； they all go； taking with them their entire stock of provisions； their cooking utensils； weapons； hammocks； and even their pet animals。 Fortunately in this case they had not taken quite everything； my hammock was there； also one small pot； some cassava bread； purple potatoes； and a few ears of maize。 I concluded that these had been left for me in the event of my return； also that they had not been gone very many hours； since a log of wood buried under the ashes of the hearth was still alight。 Now； as their absences from home usually last many days； it was plain that I would have the big naked barn…like house to myself for as long as I thought proper to remain； with little food to eat； but the prospect did not disturb me； and I resolved to amuse myself with music。 In vain I hunted for my guitar； the Indians had taken it to delight their friends by twanging its strings。 At odd moments during the last day or two I had been composing a simple melody in my brain； fitting it to ancient words； and now； without an instrument to assist me； I began softly singing to myself：
Muy mas clara que la luna
Sola una
en el mundo vos nacistes。
After music I made up the fire and parched an ear of maize for my dinner； and while laboriously crunching the dry hard grain I thanked Heaven for having bestowed on me such good molars。 Finally I slung my hammock in its old corner； and placing myself in it in my favourite oblique position； my hands clasped behind my head； one knee cocked up； the other leg dangling down； I resigned myself to idle thought。 I felt very happy。 How strange； thought I； with a little self…flattery； that I； accustomed to the agreeable society of intelligent men and charming women； and of books； should find such perfect contentment here！ But I congratulated myself too soon。 The profound silence began at length to oppress me。 It was not like the forest； where one has wild birds for company； where their cries； albeit inarticulate； have a meaning and give a charm to solitude。 Even the sight and whispered sounds of green leaves and rushes trembling in the wind have for us something of intelligence and sympathy； but I could not commune with mud walls and an earthen pot。 Feeling my loneliness too acutely； I began to regret that I had left Rima； then to feel remorse at the secrecy I had practiced。 Even now while I inclined idly in my hammock； she would be roaming the forest in search of me； listening for my footsteps； fearing perhaps that I had met with some accident where there was no person to succour me。 It was painful to think of her in this way； of the pain I had doubtless given her by stealing off without a word of warning。 Springing to the floor； I flung out of the house and went down to the stream。 It was better there； for now the greatest heat of the day was over； and the weltering sun began to look large and red and rayless through the afternoon haze。
I seated myself on a stone within a yard or two of the limpid water； and now the sight of nature and the warm； vital air and sunshine infected my spirit and made it possible for me to face the position calmly； even hopefully。 The position was this： for some days the idea had been present in my mind； and was now fixed there； that this desert was to be my permanent home。 The thought of going back to Caracas； that little Paris in America； with its Old World vices； its idle political passions； its empty round of gaieties； was unendurable。 I was changed； and this changeso great； so completewas proof that the old artificial life had not been and could not be the real one； in harmony with my deeper and truer nature。 I deceived myself； you will say； as I have often myself said。 I had and I had not。 It is too long a question to discuss here； but just then I felt that I had quitted the hot； tainted atmosphere of the ballroom； that the morning air of heaven refreshed and elevated me and was sweet to breathe。 Friends and relations I had who were dear to me； but I could forget them； even as I could forget the splendid dreams which had been mine。 And the woman I had loved； and who perhaps loved me in returnI could forget her too。 A daughter of civilization and of that artificial life； she could never experience such feelings as these and return to nature as I was doing。 For women； though within narrow limits more plastic than men； are yet without that larger adaptiveness which can take us back to the sources of life； w