capital； Mr。 Micawber has not。 We saw； I think； the greater part of
the Medway； and that is my individual conclusion。 Being so near
here； Mr。 Micawber was of opinion that it would be rash not to
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
come on； and see the Cathedral。 Firstly； on account of its being so
well worth seeing； and our never having seen it； and secondly； on
account of the great probability of something turning up in a
cathedral town。 We have been here；’ said Mrs。 Micawber； ‘three
days。 Nothing has； as yet； turned up； and it may not surprise you；
my dear Master Copperfield； so much as it would a stranger； to
know that we are at present waiting for a remittance from London；
to discharge our pecuniary obligations at this hotel。 Until the
arrival of that remittance；’ said Mrs。 Micawber with much feeling；
‘I am cut off from my home （I allude to lodgings in Pentonville）；
from my boy and girl； and from my twins。’
I felt the utmost sympathy for Mr。 and Mrs。 Micawber in this
anxious extremity； and said as much to Mr。 Micawber； who now
returned： adding that I only wished I had money enough； to lend
them the amount they needed。 Mr。 Micawber’s answer expressed
the disturbance of his mind。 He said； shaking hands with me；
‘Copperfield； you are a true friend； but when the worst comes to
the worst； no man is without a friend who is possessed of shaving
materials。’ At this dreadful hint Mrs。 Micawber threw her arms
round Mr。 Micawber’s neck and entreated him to be calm。 He
wept； but so far recovered； almost immediately； as to ring the bell
for the waiter； and bespeak a hot kidney pudding and a plate of
shrimps for breakfast in the morning。
When I took my leave of them； they both pressed me so much to
come and dine before they went away； that I could not refuse。 But；
as I knew I could not come next day； when I should have a good
deal to prepare in the evening； Mr。 Micawber arranged that he
would call at Doctor Strong’s in the course of the morning （having
a presentiment that the remittance would arrive by that post）； and
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
propose the day after； if it would suit me better。 Accordingly I was
called out of school next forenoon； and found Mr。 Micawber in the
parlour； who had called to say that the dinner would take place as
proposed。 When I asked him if the remittance had come； he
pressed my hand and departed。
As I was looking out of window that same evening； it surprised
me； and made me rather uneasy； to see Mr。 Micawber and Uriah
Heep walk past； arm in arm： Uriah humbly sensible of the honour
that was done him； and Mr。 Micawber taking a bland delight in
extending his patronage to Uriah。 But I was still more surprised；
when I went to the little hotel next day at the appointed dinner…
hour； which was four o’clock； to find； from what Mr。 Micawber
said； that he had gone home with Uriah； and had drunk brandy…
and…water at Mrs。 Heep’s。
‘And I’ll tell you what； my dear Copperfield；’ said Mr。
Micawber； ‘your friend Heep is a young fellow who might be
attorney…general。 If I had known that young man； at the period
when my difficulties came to a crisis； all I can say is； that I believe
my creditors would have been a great deal better managed than
they were。’
I hardly understood how this could have been； seeing that Mr。
Micawber had paid them nothing at all as it was； but I did not like
to ask。 Neither did I like to say； that I hoped he had not been too
communicative to Uriah； or to inquire if they had talked much
about me。 I was afraid of hurting Mr。 Micawber’s feelings； or； at all
events； Mrs。 Micawber’s； she being very sensitive； but I was
uncomfortable about it； too； and often thought about it afterwards。
We had a beautiful little dinner。 Quite an elegant dish of fish；
the kidney…end of a loin of veal； roasted； fried sausage…meat； a
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield 363
partridge； and a pudding。 There was wine； and there was strong
ale； and after dinner Mrs。 Micawber made us a bowl of hot punch
with her own hands。
Mr。 Micawber was uncommonly convivial。 I never saw him such
good company。 He made his face shine with the punch； so that it
looked as if it had been varnished all over。 He got cheerfully
sentimental about the town； and proposed success to it； observing
that Mrs。 Micawber and himself had been made extremely snug
and comfortable there and that he never should forget the
agreeable hours they had passed in Canterbury。 He proposed me
afterwards； and he； and Mrs。 Micawber； and I； took a review of our
past acquaintance； in the course of which we sold the property all
over again。 Then I proposed Mrs。 Micawber： or； at least； said；
modestly； ‘If you’ll allow me； Mrs。 Micawber； I shall now have the
pleasure of drinking your health； ma’am。’ On which Mr。 Micawber
delivered an eulogium on Mrs。 Micawber’s character； and said she
had ever been his guide； philosopher； and friend； and that he
would recommend me； when I came to a marrying time of life； to
marry such another woman； if such another woman could be
found。
As the punch disappeared； Mr。 Micawber became still more
friendly and convivial。 Mrs。 Micawber’s spirits becoming elevated；
too； we sang ‘Auld Lang Syne’。 When we came to ‘Here’s a hand；
my trusty frere’； we all joined hands round the table； and when we
declared we would ‘take a right gude Willie Waught’； and hadn’t
the least idea what it meant； we were really affected。
In a word； I never saw anybody so thoroughly jovial as Mr。
Micawber was； down to the very last moment of the evening； when
I took a hearty farewell of himself and his amiable wife。
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
Consequently； I was not prepared； at seven o’clock next morning；
to receive the following communication； dated half past nine in the
evening； a quarter of an hour after I had left him：—
‘My DEAR YOUNG FRIEND；
‘The die is cast—all is over。 Hiding the ravages of care with a
sickly mask of mirth； I have not informed you； this evening； that
there is no hope of the remittance！ Under these circumstances；
alike humiliating to endure； humiliating to contemplate； and
humiliating to relate； I have discharged the pecuniary liability
contracted at this establishment； by giving a note of hand； made
payable fourteen days after date； at my residence； Pentonville；
London。 When it becomes due； it will not be taken up。 The result
is destruction。 The bolt is impending； and the tree must fall。
‘Let the wretched man who now addresses you； my dear
Copperfield； be a beacon to you through life。 He writes with that
intention； and in that hope。 If he could think himself of so much
use； one gleam of day might； by possibility； penetrate into the
cheerless dungeon of his remaining existence—though his
longevity is； at present （to say the least of it）； extremely
problematical。
‘This is the last communication； my dear Copperfield； you will
ever receive
‘From
The
‘Beggared Outcast；
‘WILKINS MICAWBER。’
I was so shocked by the contents of this heart…rending letter；
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
that I ran off directly towards the little hotel with the intention of
taking it on my way to Doctor Strong’s； and trying to soothe Mr。
Micawber with a word of comfort。 But； half…way there； I met the
London coach with Mr。 and Mrs。 Micawber up behind； Mr。
Micawber； the very picture of tranquil enjoyment； smiling at Mrs。
Micawber’s conversation； eating walnuts out of a paper bag； with a
bottle sticking out of his breast pocket。 As they did not see me； I
thought it best； all things considered； not to see them。 So； with a
great weight taken off my mind； I turned into a by…street that was
the nearest way to school； and felt； upon the whole； relieved that
they were gone； though I still liked them very much； nevertheless。
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
Chapter 18
A RETROSPECT
My school…days！ The silent gliding on of my existence—
the unseen； unfelt progress of my life—from childhood
up to youth！ Let me think； as I look back upon that
flowing water； now a dry channel overgrown with leaves； whether
there are any marks along its course； by which I can remember
how it ran。
A moment； and I occupy my place in the Cathedral； where we
all went together； every Sunday morning； assembling first at
school for that purpose。 The earthy smell； the sunless air； the
sensation of the world being shut out； the resounding of the organ
through the black and white arched galleries and aisles； are wings
that take me back； and hold me hovering above those days； in a
half…sleeping and half…waking dream。
I am not the last boy in the school。 I have risen in a few months；
over several heads。 But the first boy seems to me a mighty
creature； dwelling afar off； whose giddy height is unattainable。
Agnes says ‘No；’ but I say ‘Yes；’ and tell her that she little thinks
what stores of knowledge have been mastered by the wonderful
Being； at whose place she thinks I； even I； weak aspirant； may
arrive in time。 He is not my private friend and public patron； as
Steerforth was； but I hold him in a reverential respect。 I chiefly
wonder what he’ll be； when he leaves Doctor Strong’s； and what
mankind will do to maintain any place against him。
But who is this that breaks upon me？ This is Miss Shepherd；
Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics
David Copperfield
whom I love。
Miss Shepherd is a boarder at the Misses Nettingalls’
establishment。 I adore Miss Shepherd。 She is a little girl； in a
spencer； with a round face and curly flaxen hair。 The Misses
Nettingalls’ young ladies come to the Cathedral too。 I cannot look
upon my book； for I must look upon Miss Shepherd。 When the
choristers chaunt； I hear Miss Shepherd。 In the service I mentally
insert Miss Shepherd’s name—I put her in among the Royal
Family。 At home； in my own room； I am sometime