novel notes- 第14部分

Our　chief　recreation；　our　sole　consolation；　during　the　long　weeks　of　our　imprisonment；　was　to　watch　from　our　windows　the　pleasure…seekers　passing　by　in　small　open　boats；　and　to　reflect　what　an　awful　day　they　had　had；　or　were　going　to　have；　as　the　case　might　be。

In　the　forenoon　they　would　head　up　streamyoung　men　with　their　sweethearts；　nephews　taking　out　their　rich　old　aunts；　husbands　and　wives　（some　of　them　pairs；　some　of　them　odd　ones）；　stylish…looking　girls　with　cousins；　energetic…looking　men　with　dogs；　high…class　silent　parties；　low…class　noisy　parties；　quarrelsome　family　parties…　…boatload　after　boatload　they　went　by；　wet；　but　still　hopeful；　pointing　out　bits　of　blue　sky　to　each　other。

In　the　evening　they　would　return；　drenched　and　gloomy；　saying　disagreeable　things　to　one　another。

One　couple；　and　one　couple　only；　out　of　the　many　hundreds　that　passed　under　our　review；　came　back　from　the　ordeal　with　pleasant　faces。　　He　was　rowing　hard　and　singing；　with　a　handkerchief　tied　round　his　head　to　keep　his　hat　on；　and　she　was　laughing　at　him；　while　trying　to　hold　up　an　umbrella　with　one　hand　and　steer　with　the　other。

There　are　but　two　explanations　to　account　for　people　being　jolly　on　the　river　in　the　rain。　　The　one　I　dismissed　as　being　both　uncharitable　and　improbable。　　The　other　was　creditable　to　the　human　race；　and；　adopting　it；　I　took　off　my　cap　to　this　damp　but　cheerful　pair　as　they　went　by。　　They　answered　with　a　wave　of　the　hand；　and　I　stood　looking　after　them　till　they　disappeared　in　the　mist。

I　am　inclined　to　think　that　those　young　people；　if　they　be　still　alive；　are　happy。　　Maybe；　fortune　has　been　kind　to　them；　or　maybe　she　has　not；　but　in　either　event　they　are；　I　am　inclined　to　think；　happier　than　are　most　people。

Now　and　again；　the　daily　tornado　would　rage　with　such　fury　as　to　defeat　its　own　purpose　by　prematurely　exhausting　itself。　　On　these　rare　occasions　we　would　sit　out　on　the　deck；　and　enjoy　the　unwonted　luxury　of　fresh　air。

I　remember　well　those　few　pleasant　evenings：　　the　river；　luminous　with　the　drowned　light；　the　dark　banks　where　the　night　lurked；　the　storm…tossed　sky；　jewelled　here　and　there　with　stars。

It　was　delightful　not　to　hear　for　an　hour　or　so　the　sullen　thrashing　of　the　rain；　but　to　listen　to　the　leaping　of　the　fishes；　the　soft　swirl　raised　by　some　water…rat；　swimming　stealthily　among　the　rushes；　the　restless　twitterings　of　the　few　still　wakeful　birds。

An　old　corncrake　lived　near　to　us；　and　the　way　he　used　to　disturb　all　the　other　birds；　and　keep　them　from　going　to　sleep；　was　shameful。　　Amenda；　who　was　town…bred；　mistook　him　at　first　for　one　of　those　cheap　alarm　clocks；　and　wondered　who　was　winding　him　up；　and　why　they　went　on　doing　it　all　night；　and；　above　all；　why　they　didn't　oil　him。

He　would　begin　his　unhallowed　performance　about　dusk；　just　as　every　respectable　bird　was　preparing　to　settle　down　for　the　night。　　A　family　of　thrushes　had　their　nest　a　few　yards　from　his　stand；　and　they　used　to　get　perfectly　furious　with　him。

〃There's　that　fool　at　it　again；〃　the　female　thrush　would　say；　〃why　can't　he　do　it　in　the　day…time　if　he　must　do　it　at　all？〃　　（She　spoke；　of　course；　in　twitters；　but　I　am　confident　the　above　is　a　correct　translation。）

After　a　while；　the　young　thrushes　would　wake　up　and　begin　chirping；　and　then　the　mother　would　get　madder　than　ever。

〃Can't　you　say　something　to　him？〃　she　would　cry　indignantly　to　her　husband。　　〃How　do　you　think　the　children　can　get　to　sleep；　poor　things；　with　that　hideous　row　going　on　all　night？　　Might　just　as　well　be　living　in　a　saw…mill。〃

Thus　adjured；　the　male　thrush　would　put　his　head　over　the　nest；　and　call　out　in　a　nervous；　apologetic　manner：…

〃I　say；　you　know；　you　there；　I　wish　you　wouldn't　mind　being　quiet　a　bit。　　My　wife　says　she　can't　get　the　children　to　sleep。　　It's　too　bad；　you　know；　'pon　my　word　it　is。〃

〃Gor　on；〃　the　corncrake　would　answer　surlily。　　〃You　keep　your　wife　herself　quiet；　that's　enough　for　you　to　do。〃　　And　on　he　would　go　again　worse　than　before。

Then　a　mother　blackbird；　from　a　little　further　off；　would　join　in　the　fray。

〃Ah；　it's　a　good　hiding　he　wants；　not　a　talking　to。　　And　if　I　was　a　cock；　I'd　give　it　him。〃　　（This　remark　would　be　made　in　a　tone　of　withering　contempt；　and　would　appear　to　bear　reference　to　some　previous　discussion。）

〃You're　quite　right；　ma'am；〃　Mrs。　Thrush　would　reply。　　〃That's　what　I　tell　my　husband；　but〃　（with　rising　inflection；　so　that　every　lady　in　the　plantation　might　hear）　〃HE　wouldn't　move　himself；　bless　you　no；　not　if　I　and　the　children　were　to　die　before　his　eyes　for　want　of　sleep。〃

〃Ah；　he　ain't　the　only　one；　my　dear；〃　the　blackbird　would　pipe　back；　〃they're　all　alike〃；　then；　in　a　voice　more　of　sorrow　than　of　anger：…　〃but　there；　it　ain't　their　fault；　I　suppose；　poor　things。　　If　you　ain't　got　the　spirit　of　a　bird　you　can't　help　yourself。〃

I　would　strain　my　ears　at　this　point　to　hear　if　the　male　blackbird　was　moved　at　all　by　these　taunts；　but　the　only　sound　I　could　ever　detect　coming　from　his　neighbourhood　was　that　of　palpably　exaggerated　snoring。

By　this　time　the　whole　glade　would　be　awake；　expressing　views　concerning　that　corncrake　that　would　have　wounded　a　less　callous　nature。

〃Blow　me　tight；　Bill；〃　some　vulgar　little　hedge…sparrow　would　chirp　out；　in　the　midst　of　the　hubbub；　〃if　I　don't　believe　the　gent　thinks　'e's　a…singing。〃

〃'Tain't　'is　fault；〃　Bill　would　reply；　with　mock　sympathy。　〃Somebody's　put　a　penny　in　the　slot；　and　'e　can't　stop　'isself。〃

Irritated　by　the　laugh　that　this　would　call　forth　from　the　younger　birds；　the　corncrake　would　exert　himself　to　be　more　objectionable　than　ever；　and；　as　a　means　to　this　end；　would　commence　giving　his　marvellous　imitation　of　the　sharpening　of　a　rusty　saw　by　a　steel　file。

But　at　this　an　old　crow；　not　to　be　trifled　with；　would　cry　out　angrily：…

〃Stop　that；　now。　　If　I　come　down　to　you　I'll　peck　your　cranky　head　off；　I　will。〃

And　then　would　follow　silence　for　a　quarter　of　an　hour；　after　which　the　whole　thing　would　begin　again。



CHAPTER　V



Brown　and　MacShaughnassy　came　down　together　on　the　Saturday　afternoon；　and；　as　soon　as　they　had　dried　themselves；　and　had　had　some　tea；　we　settled　down　to　work。

Jephson　had　written　that　he　would　not　be　able　to　be　with　us　until　late　in　the　evening；　and　Brown　proposed　that　we　should　occupy　ourselves　until　his　arrival　with　plots。

〃Let　each　of　us；〃　said　he；　〃sketch　out　a　plot。　　Afterwards　we　can　compare　them；　and　select　the　best。〃

This　we　proceeded　to　do。　　The　plots　themselves　I　forget；　but　I　remember　that　at　the　subsequent　judging　each　man　selected　his　own；　and　became　so　indignant　at　the　bitter　criticism　to　which　it　was　subjected　by　the　other　two；　that　he　tore　it　up；　and；　for　the　next　half…hour；　we　sat　and　smoked　in　silence。

When　I　was　very　young　I　yearned　to　know　other　people's　opinion　of　me　and　all　my　works；　now；　my　chief　aim　is　to　avoid　hearing　it。　　In　those　days；　had　any　one　told　me　there　was　half　a　line　about　myself　in　a　newspaper；　I　should　have　tramped　London　to　obtain　that　publication。　　Now；　when　I　see　a　column　headed　with　my　name；　I　hurriedly　fold　up　the　paper　and　put　it　away　from　me；　subduing　my　natural　curiosity　to　read　it　by　saying　to　myself；　〃Why　should　you？　It　will　only　upset　you　for　the　day。〃

In　my　cubhood　I　possessed　a　friend。　　Other　friends　have　come　into　my　life　sincevery　dear　and　precious　friendsbut　they　have　none　of　them　been　to　me　quite　what　this　friend　was。　　Because　he　was　my　first　friend；　and　we　lived　together　in　a　world　that　was　much　bigger　than　this　worldmore　full　of　joy　and　of　grief；　and；　in　that　world；　we　loved　and　hated　deeper　than　we　love　and　hate　in　this　smaller　world　that　I　have　come　to　dwell　in　since。

He　also　had　the　very　young　man's　craving　to　be　criticised；　and　we　made　it　our　custom　to　oblige　each　other。　　We　did　not　know　then　that　what　we　meant；　when　we　asked　for　〃criticism；〃　was　encouragement。　　We　thought　that　we　were　strongone　does　at　the　beginning　of　the　battle；　and　that　we　could　bear　to　hear　the　truth。

Accordingly；　each　one　pointed　out　to　the　other　one　his　errors；　and　this　task　kept　us　both　so　busy　that　we　had　never　time　to　say　a　word　of　praise　to　one　another。　　That　we　each　had　a　high　opinion　of　the　other's　talents　I　am　convinced；　but　our　heads　were　full　of　silly　saws。　　We　said　to　ourselves：　　〃There　are　many　who　will　praise　a　man；　it　is　only　his　friend　who　will　tell　him　of　his　faults。〃　　Also；　we　said：　　〃No　man　sees　his　own　shortcomings；　but　when　these　are　pointed　out　to　him　by　another　he　is　grateful；　and　proceeds　to　mend　them。〃

As　we　came　to　know　the　world　better；　we　learnt　the　fallacy　of　these　ideas。　　But　then　it　was　too　late；　for　the　mischief　had　been　done。

When　one　of　us　had　written　anything；　he　would　read　it　to　the　other；　and　when　he　had　finished　he　would　say；　〃Now；　tell　me　what　you　think　of　itfrankly　and　as　a　friend。〃

Those　were　his　words。　　But　his　thoughts；　though　he　may　not　have　known　them；　were：…

〃Tell　me　it　is　clever　and　good；　my　friend；　even　if　you　do　not　think　so。　　The　world　is　very　cruel　to　those　that　have　not　yet　conquered　it；　and；　though　we　keep　a　careless　face；　our　young　hearts　are　scored　with　wrinkles。　　Often　we　grow　weary　and　faint…hearted。　　Is　it　not　so；　my　friend？　　No　one　has　faith　in　us；　and　in　our　dark　hours　we　doubt　ourselves。　　You　are　my　comrade。　　You　know　what　of　myself　I　have　put　into　this　thing　that　to　others　will　be　but　an　idle　half…　hour's　reading。　　Tell　me　it　is　good；　my　friend。　　Put　a　little　heart　into　me；　I　pray　you。〃

But　the　other；　full　of　the　lust　of　criticism；　which　is　civilisation's　substitute　for　cruelty；　would　answer　more　in　frankness　than　in　friendship。　　Then　he　who　had　written　would　flush　angrily；　and　scornful　words　would　pass。

One　evening；　he　read　me　a　play　he　had　written。　　There　was　much　that　was　good　in　it；　but　there　were　also　faults　（there　are　in　some　plays）；　and　these　I　seized　upon　and　made　merry　over。　　I　could　hardly　have　dealt　out　to　the　piece　more　unnecessary　bitterness　had　I　been　a　professional　critic。

As　soon　as　I　paused　from　my　sport　he　rose；　and；　taking　his　manuscript　from　the　table；　tore　it　in　two；　and　flung　it　in　the　fire…　…he　was　but　a　very　young　man；　you　must　rememberand　then；　standing　before　me　with　a　white　face；　told　me；　unsolicited；