a far country- 第18部分

Mingled　with　my　anxiety；　which　was　real；　was　an　exultation　that　would　not
down。　　Nevertheless；　the　idea　of　developing　Tom　into　a　Shakespeare；Tom；
who　had　not　the　slightest　desire　to　be　one　I　was　appalling；　besides
having　in　it　an　element　of　useless　self…sacrifice　from　which　I　recoiled。
On　the　other　hand；　if　Alonzo　should　discover　that　I　had　written　his
theme；　there　were　penalties　I　did　not　care　to　dwell　upon　。。。。　　With　such
a　cloud　hanging　over　me　I　passed　a　restless　night。

As　luck　would　have　it　the　very　next　evening　in　the　level　light　under　the
elms　of　the　Square　I　beheld　sauntering　towards　me　a　dapper　figure　which　I
recognized　as　that　of　Mr。　Cheyne　himself。　　As　I　saluted　him　he　gave　me　an
amused　and　most　disconcerting　glance；　and　when　I　was　congratulating
myself　that　he　had　passed　me　he　stopped。

〃Fine　weather　for　March；　Paret；〃　he　observed。

〃Yes；　sir；〃　I　agreed　in　a　strange　voice。

〃By　the　way；〃　he　remarked；　contemplating　the　bare　branches　above　our
heads；　〃that　was　an　excellent　theme　your　roommate　handed　in。　　I　had　no
idea　that　he　possessed　suchsuch　genius。　　Did　you；　by　any　chance；　happen
to　read　it？〃

〃Yes；　sir；I　read　it。〃

〃Weren't　you　surprised？〃　inquired　Mr。　Cheyne。

〃Well；　yes；　sirthat　isI　mean　to　say　he　talks　just　like　that；
sometimesthat　is；　when　it's　anything　he　cares　about。〃

〃Indeed！〃　said　Mr。　Cheyne。　　〃That's　interesting；　most　interesting。　　In
all　my　experience；　I　do　not　remember　a　case　in　which　a　gift　has　been
developed　so　rapidly。　　I　don't　want　to　give　the　impressionah　that　there
is　no　room　for　improvement；　but　the　thing　was　very　well　done；　for　an
undergraduate。　　I　must　confess　I　never　should　have　suspected　it　in
Peters；　and　it's　most　interesting　what　you　say　about　his　cleverness　in
conversation。〃　　He　twirled　the　head　of　his　stick；　apparently　lost　in
reflection。　　〃I　may　be　wrong；〃　he　went　on　presently；　〃I　have　an　idea　it
is　you〃　　I　must　literally　have　jumped　away　from　him。　　He　paused　a
moment；　without　apparently　noticing　my　panic；　〃that　it　is　you　who　have
influenced　Peters。〃

〃Sir？〃

〃I　am　wrong；　then。　　Or　is　this　merely　commendable　modesty　on　your　part？〃

〃Oh；　no；　sir。〃

〃Then　my　hypothesis　falls　to　the　ground。　　I　had　greatly　hoped；〃　he　added
meaningly；　〃that　you　might　be　able　to　throw　some　light　on　this　mystery。

I　was　dumb。

〃Paret；〃　he　asked；　〃have　you　time　to　come　over　to　my　rooms　for　a　few
minutes　this　evening？〃

〃Certainly；　sir。〃

He　gave　me　his　number　in　Brattle　Street。。。。

Like　one　running　in　a　nightmare　and　making　no　progress　I　made　my　way
home；　only　to　learn　from　Hallam；who　lived　on　the　same　floor；that　Tom
had　inconsiderately　gone　to　Boston　for　the　evening；　with　four　other　weary
spirits　in　search　of　relaxation！　　Avoiding　our　club　table；　I　took　what
little　nourishment　I　could　at　a　modest　restaurant；　and　restlessly　paced
the　moonlit　streets　until　eight　o'clock；　when　I　found　myself　in　front　of
one　of　those　low…gabled　colonial　houses　which；　on　less　soul…shaking
occasions；　had　exercised　a　great　charm　on　my　imagination。　　My　hand　hung
for　an　instant　over　the　bell。。。。　　I　must　have　rung　it　violently；　for
there　appeared　almost　immediately　an　old　lady　in　a　lace　cap；　who　greeted
me　with　gentle　courtesy；　and　knocked　at　a　little　door　with　glistening
panels。　　The　latch　was　lifted　by　Mr。　Cheyne　himself。

〃Come　in；　Paret；〃　he　said；　in　a　tone　that　was　unexpectedly　hospitable。

I　have　rarely　seen　a　more　inviting　room。　　A　wood　fire　burned　brightly　on
the　brass　andirons；　flinging　its　glare　on　the　big；　white　beam　that
crossed　the　ceiling；　and　reddening　the　square　panes　of　the　windows　in
their　panelled　recesses。　　Between　these　were　rows　of　books；attractive
books　in　chased　bindings；　red　and　blue；　books　that　appealed　to　be　taken
down　and　read。　　There　was　a　table　covered　with　reviews　and　magazines　in
neat　piles；　and　a　lamp　so　shaded　as　to　throw　its　light　only　on　the　white
blotter　of　the　pad。　　Two　easy　chairs；　covered　with　flowered　chintz；　were
ranged　before　the　fire；　in　one　of　which　I　sank；　much　bewildered；　upon
being　urged　to　do　so。

I　utterly　failed　to　recognize　〃Alonzo〃　in　this　new　atmosphere。　　And　he
had；　moreover；　dropped　the　subtly　sarcastic　manner　I　was　wont　to
associate　with　him。

〃Jolly　old　house；　isn't　it？〃　he　observed；　as　though　I　had　casually
dropped　in　on　him　for　a　chat；　and　he　stood；　with　his　hands　behind　him
stretched　to　the　blaze；　looking　down　at　me。　　〃It　was　built　by　a　certain
Colonel　Draper；　who　fought　at　Louisburg；　and　afterwards　fled　to　England
at　the　time　of　the　Revolution。　　He　couldn't　stand　the　patriots；　I'm　not
so　sure　that　I　blame　him；　either。　　Are　you　interested　in　colonial　things；
Mr。　Paret？〃

I　said　I　was。　　If　the　question　had　concerned　Aztec　relics　my　answer　would
undoubtedly　have　been　the　same。　　And　I　watched　him；　dazedly；　while　he
took　down　a　silver　porringer　from　the　shallow　mantel　shelf。

〃It's　not　a　Revere；〃　he　said；　in　a　slightly　apologetic　tone　as　though　to
forestall　a　comment；　〃but　it's　rather　good；　I　think。　　I　picked　it　up　at　a
sale　in　Dorchester。　　But　I　have　never　been　able　to　identify　the　coat　of
arms。〃

He　showed　me　a　ladle；　with　the　names　of　〃Patience　and　William　Simpson〃
engraved　quaintly　thereon；　and　took　down　other　articles　in　which　I
managed　to　feign　an　interest。　　Finally　he　seated　himself　in　the　chair
opposite；　crossed　his　feet；　putting　the　tips　of　his　fingers　together　and
gazing　into　the　fire。

〃So　you　thought　you　could　fool　me；〃　he　said；　at　length。

I　became　aware　of　the　ticking　of　a　great　clock　in　the　corner。　　My　mouth
was　dry。

〃I　am　going　to　forgive　you；〃　he　went　on；　more　gravely；　〃for　several
reasons。　　I　don't　flatter；　as　you　know。　　It's　because　you　carried　out　the
thing　so　perfectly　that　I　am　led　to　think　you　have　a　gift　that　may　be
cultivated；　Paret。　　You　wrote　that　theme　in　the　way　Peters　would　have
written　it　if　he　had　not　beenwhat　shall　I　say？scripturally
inarticulate。　　And　I　trust　it　may　do　you　some　good　if　I　say　it　was
something　of　a　literary　achievement；　if　not　a　moral　one。〃

〃Thank　you；　sir；〃　I　faltered。

〃Have　you　ever；〃　he　inquired；　lapsing　a　little　into　his　lecture…room
manner；　〃seriously　thought　of　literature　as　a　career？　　Have　you　ever
thought　of　any　career　seriously？〃

〃I　once　wished　to　be　a　writer；　sir；〃　I　replied　tremulously；　but　refrained
from　telling　him　of　my　father's　opinion　of　the　profession。　　Ambitiona
purer　ambition　than　I　had　known　for　yearsleaped　within　me　at　his　words。
He；　Alonzo　Cheyne；　had　detected　in　me　the　Promethean　fire！

I　sat　there　until　ten　o'clock　talking　to　the　real　Mr。　Cheyne；　a　human　Mr。
Cheyne　unknown　in　the　lecture…room。　　Nor　had　I　suspected　one　in　whom
cynicism　and　distrust　of　undergraduates　（of　my　sort）　seemed　so　ingrained；
of　such　idealism。　　He　did　not　pour　it　out　in　preaching；　delicately；
unobtrusively　and　on　the　whole　rather　humorously　he　managed　to　present　to
me　in　a　most　disillusionizing　light　that　conception　of　the　university
held　by　me　and　my　intimate　associates。　　After　I　had　left　him　I　walked　the
quiet　streets　to　behold　as　through　dissolving　mists　another　Harvard；　and
there　trembled　in　my　soul　like　the　birth…struggle　of　a　flame　something　of
the　vision　later　to　be　immortalized　by　St。　Gaudens；　the　spirit　of　Harvard
responding　to　the　spirit　of　the　Republicto　the　call　of　Lincoln；　who
voiced　it。　　The　place　of　that　bronze　at　the　corner　of　Boston　Common　was
as　yet　empty；　but　I　have　since　stood　before　it　to　gaze　in　wonder　at　the
light　shining　in　darkness　on　mute；　uplifted　faces　；black　faces！　at
Harvard's　son　leading　them　on　that　the　light　might　live　and　prevail。

I；　too；　longed　for　a　Cause　into　which　I　might　fling　myself；　in　which　I
might　lose　myself。。。　　I　halted　on　the　sidewalk　to　find　myself　staring
from　the　opposite　side　of　the　street　at　a　familiar　house；　my　old
landlady's；　Mrs。　Bolton's；　and　summoned　up　before　me　was　the　tired；
smiling　face　of　Hermann　Krebs。　　Was　it　because　when　he　had　once　spoken　so
crudely　of　the　University　I　had　seen　the　reflection　of　her　spirit　in　his
eyes？　　A　light　still　burned　in　the　extension　roofKrebs's　light；　another
shone　dimly　through　the　ground　glass　of　the　front　door。　　Obeying　a　sudden
impulse；　I　crossed　the　street。

Mrs。　Bolton；　in　the　sky…blue　wrapper；　and　looking　more　forbidding　than
ever；　answered　the　bell。　　Life　had　taught　her　to　be　indifferent　to
surprises；　and　it　was　I　who　became　abruptly　embarrassed。

〃Oh；　it's　you；　Mr。　Paret；〃　she　said；　as　though　I　had　been　a　frequent
caller。　　I　had　never　once　darkened　her　threshold　since　I　had　left　her
house。

〃Yes；〃　I　answered；　and　hesitated。。。。　　〃Is　Mr。　Krebs　in？〃

〃Well；〃　she　replied　in　a　lifeless　tone；　which　nevertheless　had　in　it　a
touch　of　bitterness；　〃I　guess　there's　no　reason　why　you　and　your　friends
should　have　known　he　was　sick。〃

〃Sick！〃　I　repeated。　　〃Is　he　very　sick？〃

〃I　calculate　he'll　pull　through；〃　she　said。　　〃Sunday　the　doctor　gave　him
up。　　And　no　wonder！　　He　hasn't　had　any　proper　food　since　he's　be'n　here！〃
She　paused；　eyeing　me。　　〃If　you'll　excuse　me；　Mr。　Paret；　I　was　just　going
up　to　him　when　you　rang。〃

〃Certainly；〃　I　replied　awkwardly。　　〃Would　you　be　so　kind　as　to　tell　him
when　he's　well　enoughthat　I　came　to　see　him；　and　that　I'm　sorry？〃

There　was　another　pause；　and　she　stood　with　a　hand　defensively　clutching
the　knob。

〃Yes；　I'll　tell　him；〃　she　said。

With　a　sense　of　having　been　baffled；　I　turned　away。

Walking　back　toward　the　Yard　my　attention　was　attracted　by　a　slowly
approaching　cab　whose　occupants　were　disturbing　the　quiet　of　the　night
with　song。

Shollity'tis　wine；　'tis　wine；　That　makeshshollity。〃

The　vehicle　drew　up　in　front　of　a　new　and　commodious　building；I　believe
the　first　of　those　designed　to　house　undergraduates　who　were　willing　to
pay　for　private　bathrooms　and　other　modern　luxuries；　out　of　one　window　of
the　cab　protruded　a　pair　of　shoeless　feet；　out　of　the　other　a　hatless
head　I　recognized　as　belonging　to　Tom　Peters；　hence　I　surmised　that　the
feet　were　his　also。　　The　driver　got　down　from　the　box；　and　a　lively
argument　was　begun　insidefor　there　were　other　occupantsas　to　how　Mr。
Peters　was　to　be　disembarked；　and　I　gathered　from　his　frequent　references
to　the　〃Shgyptian　obelisk〃　that　the　engineering　problem　presented　struck
h