similar opinions can be found even in nineteenth…century England。
If a person has an abscess； the medical man will say that it
contains 〃peccant〃 matter； and people say that they have a 〃bad〃
arm or finger； or that they are very 〃bad〃 all over； when they only
mean 〃diseased。〃 Among foreign nations Erewhonian opinions may be
still more clearly noted。 The Mahommedans； for example； to this
day； send their female prisoners to hospitals； and the New Zealand
Maories visit any misfortune with forcible entry into the house of
the offender； and the breaking up and burning of all his goods。
The Italians； again； use the same word for 〃disgrace〃 and
〃misfortune。〃 I once heard an Italian lady speak of a young friend
whom she described as endowed with every virtue under heaven； 〃ma；〃
she exclaimed； 〃povero disgraziato； ha ammazzato suo zio。〃 （〃Poor
unfortunate fellow； he has murdered his uncle。〃）
On mentioning this； which I heard when taken to Italy as a boy by
my father； the person to whom I told it showed no surprise。 He
said that he had been driven for two or three years in a certain
city by a young Sicilian cabdriver of prepossessing manners and
appearance； but then lost sight of him。 On asking what had become
of him； he was told that he was in prison for having shot at his
father with intent to kill himhappily without serious result。
Some years later my informant again found himself warmly accosted
by the prepossessing young cabdriver。 〃Ah； caro signore；〃 he
exclaimed； 〃sono cinque anni che non lo vedotre anni di militare；
e due anni di disgrazia；〃 &c。 （〃My dear sir； it is five years
since I saw youthree years of military service； and two of
misfortune〃）during which last the poor fellow had been in prison。
Of moral sense he showed not so much as a trace。 He and his father
were now on excellent terms； and were likely to remain so unless
either of them should again have the misfortune mortally to offend
the other。
In the following chapter I will give a few examples of the way in
which what we should call misfortune； hardship； or disease are
dealt with by the Erewhonians； but for the moment will return to
their treatment of cases that with us are criminal。 As I have
already said； these； though not judicially punishable； are
recognised as requiring correction。 Accordingly； there exists a
class of men trained in soul…craft； whom they call straighteners；
as nearly as I can translate a word which literally means 〃one who
bends back the crooked。〃 These men practise much as medical men in
England； and receive a quasi…surreptitious fee on every visit。
They are treated with the same unreserve； and obeyed as readily； as
our own doctorsthat is to say； on the whole sufficientlybecause
people know that it is their interest to get well as soon as they
can； and that they will not be scouted as they would be if their
bodies were out of order； even though they may have to undergo a
very painful course of treatment。
When I say that they will not be scouted； I do not mean that an
Erewhonian will suffer no social inconvenience in consequence； we
will say； of having committed fraud。 Friends will fall away from
him because of his being less pleasant company； just as we
ourselves are disinclined to make companions of those who are
either poor or poorly。 No one with any sense of self…respect will
place himself on an equality in the matter of affection with those
who are less lucky than himself in birth； health； money； good
looks； capacity； or anything else。 Indeed； that dislike and even
disgust should be felt by the fortunate for the unfortunate； or at
any rate for those who have been discovered to have met with any of
the more serious and less familiar misfortunes； is not only
natural； but desirable for any society； whether of man or brute。
The fact； therefore； that the Erewhonians attach none of that guilt
to crime which they do to physical ailments； does not prevent the
more selfish among them from neglecting a friend who has robbed a
bank； for instance； till he has fully recovered； but it does
prevent them from even thinking of treating criminals with that
contemptuous tone which would seem to say； 〃I； if I were you；
should be a better man than you are；〃 a tone which is held quite
reasonable in regard to physical ailment。 Hence； though they
conceal ill health by every cunning and hypocrisy and artifice
which they can devise； they are quite open about the most flagrant
mental diseases； should they happen to exist； which to do the
people justice is not often。 Indeed； there are some who are； so to
speak； spiritual valetudinarians； and who make themselves
exceedingly ridiculous by their nervous supposition that they are
wicked； while they are very tolerable people all the time。 This
however is exceptional； and on the whole they use much the same
reserve or unreserve about the state of their moral welfare as we
do about our health。
Hence all the ordinary greetings among ourselves； such as； How do
you do？ and the like； are considered signs of gross ill…breeding；
nor do the politer classes tolerate even such a common
complimentary remark as telling a man that he is looking well。
They salute each other with； 〃I hope you are good this morning；〃 or
〃I hope you have recovered from the snappishness from which you
were suffering when I last saw you；〃 and if the person saluted has
not been good； or is still snappish； he says so at once and is
condoled with accordingly。 Indeed； the straighteners have gone so
far as to give names from the hypothetical language （as taught at
the Colleges of Unreason）； to all known forms of mental
indisposition； and to classify them according to a system of their
own； which； though I could not understand it； seemed to work well
in practice； for they are always able to tell a man what is the
matter with him as soon as they have heard his story； and their
familiarity with the long names assures him that they thoroughly
understand his case。
The reader will have no difficulty in believing that the laws
regarding ill health were frequently evaded by the help of
recognised fictions； which every one understood； but which it would
be considered gross ill…breeding to even seem to understand。 Thus；
a day or two after my arrival at the Nosnibors'； one of the many
ladies who called on me made excuses for her husband's only sending
his card； on the ground that when going through the public market…
place that morning he had stolen a pair of socks。 I had already
been warned that I should never show surprise； so I merely
expressed my sympathy； and said that though I had only been in the
capital so short a time； I had already had a very narrow escape
from stealing a clothes…brush； and that though I had resisted
temptation so far； I was sadly afraid that if I saw any object of
special interest that was neither too hot nor too heavy； I should
have to put myself in the straightener's hands。
Mrs。 Nosnibor； who had been keeping an ear on all that I had been
saying； praised me when the lady had gone。 Nothing； she said；
could have been more polite according to Erewhonian etiquette。 She
then explained that to have stolen a pair of socks； or 〃to have the
socks〃 （in more colloquial language）； was a recognised way of
saying that the person in question was slightly indisposed。
In spite of all this they have a keen sense of the enjoyment
consequent upon what they call being 〃well。〃 They admire mental
health and love it in other people； and take all the pains they can
（consistently with their other duties） to secure it for themselves。
They have an extreme dislike to marrying into what they consider
unhealthy families。 They send for the straightener at once
whenever they have been guilty of anything seriously flagitious
often even if they think that they are on the point of committing
it； and though his remedies are sometimes exceedingly painful；
involving close confinement for weeks； and in some cases the most
cruel physical tortures； I never heard of a reasonable Erewhonian
refusing to do what his straightener told him； any more than of a
reasonable Englishman refusing to undergo even the most frightful
operation； if his doctors told him it was necessary。
We in England never shrink from telling our doctor what is the
matter with us merely through the fear that he will hurt us。 We
let him do his worst upon us； and stand it without a murmur；
because we are not scouted for being ill； and because we know that
the doctor is doing his best to cure us； and that he can judge of
our case better than we can； but we should conceal all illness if
we were treated as the Erewhonians are when they have anything the
matter with them； we should do the same as with moral and
intellectual diseases；we should feign health with the most
consummate art； till we were found out； and should hate a single
flogging given in the way of mere punishment more than the
amputation of a limb； if it were kindly and courteously performed
from a wish to help us out of our difficulty； and with the full
consciousness on the part of the doctor that it was only by an
accident of constitution that he was not in the like plight
himself。 So the Erewhonians take a flogging once a week； and a
diet of bread and water for two or three months together； whenever
their straightener recommends it。
I do not suppose that even my host； on having swindled a confiding
widow out of the whole of her property； was put to more actual
suffering than a man will readily undergo at the hands of an
English doctor。 And yet he must have had a very bad time of it。
The sounds I heard were sufficient to show that his pain was
exquisite； but he never shrank from undergoing it。 He was quite
sure that it did him good； and I think he was right。 I cannot
believe that that man will ever embezzle money again。 He maybut
it will be a long time before he does so。
During my confinement in prison； and on my journey； I had already
discovered a great deal of the above； but it still seemed
surpassingly strange； and I was in constant fear of committing some
piece of rudeness； through my inability to look at things from the
same stand…point as my neighbours； but a