english stories-london- 第6部分

my　feelings　toward　her；　and　was　not　displeased　by　it。　I　looked　forward

with　some　hopefulness　to　a　day　when　I　could　declare　myself　with　no

fear　of　a　repulse。



But　it　was　a　serious　obstacle　in　my　path　that　I　could　not　secure

Bingo's　good　opinion　on　any　terms。　The　family　would　often　lament　this

pathetically　themselves。　〃You　see；〃　Mrs。　Currie　would　observe　in

apology；　〃Bingo　is　a　dog　that　does　not　attach　himself　easily　to

strangers〃though；　for　that　matter；　I　thought　he　was　unpleasantly

ready　to　attach　himself　to　/me/。



I　did　try　hard　to　conciliate　him。　I　brought　him　propitiatory　buns；

which　was　weak　and　ineffectual；　as　he　ate　them　with　avidity；　and　hated

me　as　bitterly　as　ever；　for　he　had　conceived　from　the　first　a　profound

contempt　for　me；　and　a　distrust　which　no　blandishments　of　mine　could

remove。　Looking　back　now；　I　am　inclined　to　think　it　was　a　prophetic

instinct　that　warned　him　of　what　was　to　come　upon　him　through　my

instrumentality。



Only　his　approbation　was　wanting　to　establish　for　me　a　firm　footing

with　the　Curries；　and　perhaps　determine　Lilian's　wavering　heart　in　my

direction；　but；　though　I　wooed　that　inflexible　poodle　with　an

assiduity　I　blush　to　remember；　he　remained　obstinately　firm。



Still；　day　by　day；　Lilian's　treatment　of　me　was　more　encouraging；　day

by　day　I　gained　in　the　esteem　of　her　uncle　and　aunt；　I　began　to　hope

that　soon　I　should　be　able　to　disregard　canine　influence　altogether。



Now　there　was　one　inconvenience　about　our　villa　（besides　its　flavour

of　suicide）　which　it　is　necessary　to　mention　here。　By　common　consent

all　the　cats　of　the　neighbourhood　had　selected　our　garden　for　their

evening　reunions。　I　fancy　that　a　tortoise…shell　kitchen　cat　of　ours

must　have　been　a　sort　of　leader　of　local　feline　societyI　know　she

was　〃at　home；〃　with　music　and　recitations；　on　most　evenings。



My　poor　mother　found　this　to　interfere　with　her　after…dinner　nap；　and

no　wonder；　for　if　a　cohort　of　ghosts　had　been　〃shrieking　and

squealing；〃　as　Calpurnia　puts　it；　in　our　back　garden；　or　it　had　been

fitted　up　as　a　creche　for　a　nursery　of　goblin　infants　in　the　agonies

of　teething；　the　noise　could　not　possibly　have　been　more　unearthly。



We　sought　for　some　means　of　getting　rid　of　the　nuisance：　there　was

poison；　of　course；　but　we　thought　it　would　have　an　invidious

appearance；　and　even　lead　to　legal　difficulties；　if　each　dawn　were　to

discover　an　assortment　of　cats　expiring　in　hideous　convulsions　in

various　parts　of　the　same　garden。



Firearms　too　were　open　to　objection；　and　would　scarcely　assist　my

mother's　slumbers；　so　for　some　time　we　were　at　a　loss　for　a　remedy。　At

last；　one　day；　walking　down　the　Strand；　I　chanced　to　see　（in　an　evil

hour）　what　struck　me　as　the　very　thing：　it　was　an　air…gun　of　superior

construction；　displayed　in　a　gunsmith's　window。　I　went　in　at　once；

purchased　it；　and　took　it　home　in　triumph；　it　would　be　noiseless；　and

would　reduce　the　local　average　of　cats　without　scandal；one　or　two

examples；and　feline　fashion　would　soon　migrate　to　a　more　secluded

spot。



I　lost　no　time　in　putting　this　to　the　proof。　That　same　evening　I　lay

in　wait　after　dusk　at　the　study　window；　protecting　my　mother's　repose。

As　soon　as　I　heard　the　long…drawn　wail；　the　preliminary　sputter；　and

the　wild　stampede　that　followed；　I　let　fly　in　the　direction　of　the

sound。　I　suppose　I　must　have　something　of　the　national　sporting

instinct　in　me；　for　my　blood　was　tingling　with　excitement；　but　the

feline　constitution　assimilates　lead　without　serious　inconvenience；

and　I　began　to　fear　that　no　trophy　would　remain　to　bear　witness　to　my

marksmanship。



But　all　at　once　I　made　out　a　dark；　indistinct　form　slinking　in　from

behind　the　bushes。　I　waited　till　it　crossed　a　belt　of　light　which

streamed　from　the　back　kitchen　below　me；　and　then　I　took　careful　aim

and　pulled　the　trigger。



This　time　at　least　I　had　not　failed；　there　was　a　smothered　yell；　a

rustle；　and　then　silence　again。　I　ran　out　with　the　calm　pride　of　a

successful　revenge　to　bring　in　the　body　of　my　victim；　and　I　found

underneath　a　laurel　no　predatory　tom…cat；　but　（as　the　discerning

reader　will　no　doubt　have　foreseen　long　since）　the　quivering　carcass

of　the　colonel's　black　poodle！



I　intend　to　set　down　here　the　exact　unvarnished　truth；　and　I　confess

that　at　first；　when　I　knew　what　I　had　done；　I　was　/not/　sorry。　I　was

quite　innocent　of　any　intention　of　doing　it；　but　I　felt　no　regret。　I

even　laughedmadman　that　I　wasat　the　thought　that　there　was　the　end

of　Bingo；　at　all　events；　that　impediment　was　removed；　my　weary　task　of

conciliation　was　over　for　ever！



But　soon　the　reaction　came；　I　realised　the　tremendous　nature　of　my

deed；　and　shuddered。　I　had　done　that　which　might　banish　me　from

Lilian's　side　for　ever！　All　unwittingly　I　had　slaughtered　a　kind　of

sacred　beast；　the　animal　around　which　the　Currie　household　had

wreathed　their　choicest　affections！　How　was　I　to　break　it　to　them？

Should　I　send　Bingo　in；　with　a　card　tied　to　his　neck　and　my　regrets

and　compliments？　That　was　too　much　like　a　present　of　game。　Ought　I　not

to　carry　him　in　myself？　I　would　wreathe　him　in　the　best　crape；　I　would

put　on　black　for　him；　the　Curries　would　hardly　consider　a　taper　and　a

white　sheet；　or　sack…cloth　and　ashes；　an　excessive　form　of　atonement；

but　I　could　not　grovel　to　quite　such　an　abject　extent。



I　wondered　what　the　colonel　would　say。　Simple　and　hearty；　as　a　general

rule；　he　had　a　hot　temper　on　occasions；　and　it　made　me　ill　as　I

thought；　would　he　and；　worse　still；　would　/Lilian/　believe　it　was

really　an　accident？　They　knew　what　an　interest　I　had　in　silencing　the

deceased　poodlewould　they　believe　the　simple　truth？



I　vowed　that　they　/should/　believe　me。　My　genuine　remorse　and　the

absence　of　all　concealment　on　my　part　would　speak　powerfully　for　me。　I

would　choose　a　favourable　time　for　my　confession；　that　very　evening　I

would　tell　all。



Still　I　shrank　from　the　duty　before　me；　and；　as　I　knelt　down

sorrowfully　by　the　dead　form　and　respectfully　composed　his　stiffening

limbs；　I　thought　that　it　was　unjust　of　fate　to　place　a　well…meaning

man；　whose　nerves　were　not　of　iron；　in　such　a　position。



Then；　to　my　horror；　I　heard　a　well…known　ringing　tramp　on　the　road

outside；　and　smelled　the　peculiar　fragrance　of　a　Burmese　cheroot。　It

was　the　colonel　himself；　who　had　been　taking　out　the　doomed　Bingo　for

his　usual　evening　run。



I　don't　know　how　it　was；　exactly；　but　a　sudden　panic　came　over　me。　I

held　my　breath；　and　tried　to　crouch　down　unseen　behind　the　laurels；

but　he　had　seen　me；　and　came　over　at　once　to　speak　to　me　across　the

hedge。



He　stood　there；　not　two　yards　from　his　favourite's　body！　Fortunately

it　was　unusually　dark　that　evening。



〃Ha；　there　you　are；　eh！〃　he　began；　heartily；　〃don't　rise；　my　boy；

don't　rise。〃



I　was　trying　to　put　myself　in　front　of　the　poodle；　and　did　not　rise

at　least；　only　my　hair　did。



〃You're　out　late；　ain't　you？〃　he　went　on；　〃laying　out　your　garden；

hey？〃



I　could　not　tell　him　that　I　was　laying　out　his　poodle！　My　voice　shook

as；　with　a　guilty　confusion　that　was　veiled　by　the　dusk；　I　said　it　was

a　fine　eveningwhich　it　was　not。



〃Cloudy；　sir；〃　said　the　colonel；　〃cloudy；　rain　before　morning；　I

think。　By　the　way；　have　you　seen　anything　of　Bingo　in　here？〃



This　was　the　turning…point。　What　I　/ought/　to　have　done　was　to　say

mournfully；　〃Yes；　I'm　sorry　to　say　I've　had　a　most　unfortunate

accident　with　him。　Here　he　is；　the　fact　is；　I'm　afraid　I've　/shot/

him！〃



But　I　couldn't。　I　could　have　told　him　at　my　own　time；　in　a　prepared

form　of　wordsbut　not　then。　I　felt　I　must　use　all　my　wits　to　gain

time；　and　fence　with　the　questions。



〃Why；〃　I　said；　with　a　leaden　airiness；　〃he　hasn't　given　you　the　slip；

has　he？〃



〃Never　did　such　a　thing　in　his　life！〃　said　the　colonel；　warmly；　〃he

rushed　off　after　a　rat　or　a　frog　or　something　a　few　minutes　ago；　and

as　I　stopped　to　light　another　cheroot　I　lost　sight　of　him。　I　thought　I

saw　him　slip　in　under　your　gate；　but　I've　been　calling　him　from　the

front　there　and　he　won't　come　out。〃



No；　and　he　never　/would/　come　out　any　more。　But　the　colonel　must　not

be　told　that　just　yet。　I　temporised　again：　〃If；〃　I　said；　unsteadily

〃if　he　had　slipped　in　under　the　gate　I　should　have　seen　him。　Perhaps

he　took　it　into　his　head　to　run　home？〃



〃Oh；　I　shall　find　him　on　the　door…step；　I　expect；　the　knowing　old

scamp！　Why；　what　d'　ye　think　was　the　last　thing　he　did；　now？〃



I　could　have　given　him　the　very　latest　intelligence；　but　I　dared　not。

However；　it　was　altogether　too　ghastly　to　kneel　there　and　laugh　at

anecdotes　of　Bingo　told　across　Bingo's　dead　body；　I　could　not　stand

that。　〃Listen；〃　I　said；　suddenly；　〃wasn't　that　his　bark？　There；　again；

it　seems　to　come　from　the　front　of　your　house；　don't　you　think？〃



〃Well；〃　said　the　colonel；　〃I'll　go　and　fasten　him　up　before　he's　off

again。　How　your　teeth　are　chattering！　You've　caught　a　chill；　man；　go

indoors　at　once；　and；　if　you　feel　equal　to　it；　look　in　half　an　hour

later；　about　grog…time；　and　I'll　tell　you　all　about　it。　Compliments　to

your　mother。　Don't　forgetabout　grog…time！〃



I　had　got　rid　of　him　at　last；　and　I　wiped　my　forehead；　gasping　with

relief。　I　would　go　round　in　half　an　hour；　and　then　I　should　be

prepared　to　make　my　melancholy　announcement。　For；　even　then；　I　never

thought　of　any　other　course；　until　suddenly　it　flashed　upon　me　with

terrible　clearness　that　my　miserable　shuffling　by　the　hedge　had　made

it　impossible　to　tell　the　truth！　I　had　not　told　a　direct　lie；　to　be

sure；　but　then　I　had　given　the　colonel　the　impression　that　I　had

denied　having　seen　the　dog。　Many　people　can　appease　their　consciences

by　reflecting　that；　whatever　may　be　the　effect　their　words　produce；

they　did　contrive　to　steer　clear　of　a　downright　lie。　I　never　quite

knew　where　the　distinction　lay　morally；　but　there　/is/　that　feelingI

have　it　myself。



Unfort