beasts and superbeasts- 第18部分

shall　be　cross　with　you。〃



〃I　leave　you　to　imagine；〃　wrote　Waldo　in　the　course　

of　a　long　letter　to　his　mother；　〃how　much　sleep　I　was　

able　to　recover　that　night；　and　you　know　how　essential　

nine　uninterrupted　hours　of　slumber　are　to　my　health。〃



On　the　other　hand　he　was　able　to　devote　some　wakeful　

hours　to　exercises　in　breathing　wrath　and　fury　against　

Bertie　van　Tahn。



Breakfast　at　Blonzecourt　was　a　scattered　meal；　on　

the　〃come　when　you　please〃　principle；　but　the　house…party　

was　supposed　to　gather　in　full　strength　at　lunch。　　On　the　

day　after　the　〃Game〃　had　been　started　there　were；　

however；　some　notable　absentees。　　Waldo　Plubley；　for　

instance；　was　reported　to　be　nursing　a　headache。　　A　large　

breakfast　and　an　〃A。B。C。〃　had　been　taken　up　to　his　room；　

but　he　had　made　no　appearance　in　the　flesh。



〃I　expect　he's　playing　up　to　some　character；〃　said　

Vera　Durmot；　〃isn't　there　a　thing　of　Moliere's；　'LE　

MALADE　IMAGINAIRE'？　　I　expect　he's　that。〃



Eight　or　nine　lists　came　out；　and　were　duly　

pencilled　with　the　suggestion。



〃And　where　are　the　Klammersteins？〃　asked　Lady　

Blonze；　〃they're　usually　so　punctual。〃



〃Another　character　pose；　perhaps；〃　said　Bertie　van　

Tahn；　〃　'the　Lost　Ten　Tribes。'　〃



〃But　there　are　only　three　of　them。　　Besides；　they'll　

want　their　lunch。　　Hasn't　anyone　seen　anything　of　them？〃



〃Didn't　you　take　them　out　in　your　car？〃　asked　

Blanche　Boveal；　addressing　herself　to　Cyril　Skatterly。



〃Yes；　took　them　out　to　Slogberry　Moor　immediately　

after　breakfast。　　Miss　Durmot　came　too。〃



〃I　saw　you　and　Vera　come　back；〃　said　Lady　Blonze；　

〃but　I　didn't　see　the　Klammersteins。　　Did　you　put　them　

down　in　the　village？〃



〃No；〃　said　Skatterly　shortly。



〃But　where　are　they？　　Where　did　you　leave　them？〃



〃We　left　them　on　Slogberry　Moor；〃　said　Vera　calmly。



〃On　Slogberry　Moor？　　Why；　it's　more　than　thirty　

miles　away！　　How　are　they　going　to　get　back？〃



〃We　didn't　stop　to　consider　that；〃　said　Skatterly；　

〃we　asked　them　to　get　out　for　a　moment；　on　the　pretence　

that　the　car　had　stuck；　and　then　we　dashed　off　full　speed　

and　left　them　there。〃



〃But　how　dare　you　do　such　a　thing？　　It's　most　

inhuman！　　Why；　it's　been　snowing　for　the　last　hour。〃



〃I　expect　there'll　be　a　cottage　or　farmhouse　

somewhere　if　they　walk　a　mile　or　two。〃



〃But　why　on　earth　have　you　done　it？〃



The　question　came　in　a　chorus　of　indignant　

bewilderment。



〃THAT　would　be　telling　what　our　characters　are　meant　

to　be；〃　said　Vera。



〃Didn't　I　warn　you？〃　said　Sir　Nicholas　tragically　to　

his　wife。



〃It's　something　to　do　with　Spanish　history；　we　don't　

mind　giving　you　that　clue；〃　said　Skatterly；　helping　

himself　cheerfully　to　salad；　and　then　Bertie　van　Tahn　

broke　forth　into　peals　of　joyous　laughter。



〃I've　got　it！　　Ferdinand　and　Isabella　deporting　the　

Jews！　　Oh；　lovely！　　Those　two　have　certainly　won　the　

prize；　we　shan't　get　anything　to　beat　that　for　

thoroughness。〃



Lady　Blonze's　Christmas　party　was　talked　about　and　

written　about　to　an　extent　that　she　had　not　anticipated　

in　her　most　ambitious　moments。　　The　letters　from　Waldo's　

mother　would　alone　have　made　it　memorable。





COUSIN　TERESA





BASSET　HARROWCLUFF　returned　to　the　home　of　his　

fathers；　after　an　absence　of　four　years；　distinctly　well　

pleased　with　himself。　　He　was　only　thirty…one；　but　he　had　

put　in　some　useful　service　in　an　out…of…the…way；　though　

not　unimportant；　corner　of　the　world。　　He　had　quieted　a　

province；　kept　open　a　trade　route；　enforced　the　tradition　

of　respect　which　is　worth　the　ransom　of　many　kings　in　

out…of…the…way　regions；　and　done　the　whole　business　on　

rather　less　expenditure　than　would　be　requisite　for　

organising　a　charity　in　the　home　country。　　In　Whitehall　

and　places　where　they　think；　they　doubtless　thought　well　

of　him。　　It　was　not　inconceivable；　his　father　allowed　

himself　to　imagine；　that　Basset's　name　might　figure　in　

the　next　list　of　Honours。



Basset　was　inclined　to　be　rather　contemptuous　of　his　

half…brother；　Lucas；　whom　he　found　feverishly　engrossed　

in　the　same　medley　of　elaborate　futilities　that　had　

claimed　his　whole　time　and　energies；　such　as　they　were；　

four　years　ago；　and　almost　as　far　back　before　that　as　he　

could　remember。　　It　was　the　contempt　of　the　man　of　action　

for　the　man　of　activities；　and　it　was　probably　

reciprocated。　　Lucas　was　an　over…well　nourished　

individual；　some　nine　years　Basset's　senior；　with　a　

colouring　that　would　have　been　accepted　as　a　sign　of　

intensive　culture　in　an　asparagus；　but　probably　meant　in　

this　case　mere　abstention　from　exercise。　　His　hair　and　

forehead　furnished　a　recessional　note　in　a　personality　

that　was　in　all　other　respects　obtrusive　and　assertive。　　

There　was　certainly　no　Semitic　blood　in　Lucas's　

parentage；　but　his　appearance　contrived　to　convey　at　

least　a　suggestion　of　Jewish　extraction。　　Clovis　

Sangrail；　who　knew　most　of　his　associates　by　sight；　said　

it　was　undoubtedly　a　case　of　protective　mimicry。



Two　days　after　Basset's　return；　Lucas　frisked　in　to　

lunch　in　a　state　of　twittering　excitement　that　could　not　

be　restrained　even　for　the　immediate　consideration　of　

soup；　but　had　to　be　verbally　discharged　in　spluttering　

competition　with　mouthfuls　of　vermicelli。



〃I've　got　hold　of　an　idea　for　something　immense；〃　he　

babbled；　〃something　that　is　simply　It。〃



Basset　gave　a　short　laugh　that　would　have　done　

equally　well　as　a　snort；　if　one　had　wanted　to　make　the　

exchange。　　His　half…brother　was　in　the　habit　of　

discovering　futilities　that　were　〃simply　It〃　at　

frequently　recurring　intervals。　　The　discovery　generally　

meant　that　he　flew　up　to　town；　preceded　by　glowingly…

worded　telegrams；　to　see　some　one　connected　with　the　

stage　or　the　publishing　world；　got　together　one　or　two　

momentous　luncheon　parties；　flitted　in　and　out　of　

〃Gambrinus〃　for　one　or　two　evenings；　and　returned　home　

with　an　air　of　subdued　importance　and　the　asparagus　tint　

slightly　intensified。　　The　great　idea　was　generally　

forgotten　a　few　weeks　later　in　the　excitement　of　some　new　

discovery。



〃The　inspiration　came　to　me　whilst　I　was　dressing；〃　

announced　Lucas；　〃it　will　be　THE　thing　in　the　next　music…

hall　REVUE。　　All　London　will　go　mad　over　it。　　It's　just　a　

couplet；　of　course　there　will　be　other　words；　but　they　

won't　matter。　　Listen：





Cousin　Teresa　takes　out　Caesar；

Fido；　Jock；　and　the　big　borzoi。





A　lifting；　catchy　sort　of　refrain；　you　see；　and　big…

drum　business　on　the　two　syllables　of　bor…zoi。　　It's　

immense。　　And　I've　thought　out　all　the　business　of　it；　

the　singer　will　sing　the　first　verse　alone；　then　during　

the　second　verse　Cousin　Teresa　will　walk　through；　

followed　by　four　wooden　dogs　on　wheels；　Caesar　will　be　an　

Irish　terrier；　Fido　a　black　poodle；　Jock　a　fox…terrier；　

and　the　borzoi；　of　course；　will　be　a　borzoi。　　During　the　

third　verse　Cousin　Teresa　will　come　on　alone；　and　the　

dogs　will　be　drawn　across　by　themselves　from　the　opposite　

wing；　then　Cousin　Teresa　will　catch　on　to　the　singer　and　

go　off…stage　in　one　direction；　while　the　dogs'　procession　

goes　off　in　the　other；　crossing　en　route；　which　is　always　

very　effective。　　There'll　be　a　lot　of　applause　there；　and　

for　the　fourth　verse　Cousin　Teresa　will　come　on　in　sables　

and　the　dogs　will　all　have　coats　on。　　Then　I've　got　a　

great　idea　for　the　fifth　verse；　each　of　the　dogs　will　be　

led　on　by　a　Nut；　and　Cousin　Teresa　will　come　on　from　the　

opposite　side；　crossing　en　route；　always　effective；　and　

then　she　turns　round　and　leads　the　whole　lot　of　them　off　

on　a　string；　and　all　the　time　every　one　singing　like　mad：





Cousin　Teresa　takes　out　Caesar

Fido；　Jock；　and　the　big　borzoi。





Tum…Tum！　　Drum　business　on　the　two　last　syllables。　　

I'm　so　excited；　I　shan't　sleep　a　wink　to…night。　　I'm　off　

to…morrow　by　the　ten…fifteen。　　I've　wired　to　Hermanova　to　

lunch　with　me。〃



If　any　of　the　rest　of　the　family　felt　any　excitement　

over　the　creation　of　Cousin　Teresa；　they　were　signally　

successful　in　concealing　the　fact。



〃Poor　Lucas　does　take　his　silly　little　ideas　

seriously；〃　said　Colonel　Harrowcluff　afterwards　in　the　

smoking…room。



〃Yes；〃　said　his　younger　son；　in　a　slightly　less　

tolerant　tone；　〃in　a　day　or　two　he'll　come　back　and　tell　

us　that　his　sensational　masterpiece　is　above　the　heads　of　

the　public；　and　in　about　three　weeks'　time　he'll　be　wild　

with　enthusiasm　over　a　scheme　to　dramatise　the　poems　of　

Herrick　or　something　equally　promising。〃



And　then　an　extraordinary　thing　befell。　　In　defiance　

of　all　precedent　Lucas's　glowing　anticipations　were　

justified　and　endorsed　by　the　course　of　events。　　If　

Cousin　Teresa　was　above　the　heads　of　the　public；　the　

public　heroically　adapted　itself　to　her　altitude。　　

Introduced　as　an　experiment　at　a　dull　moment　in　a　new　

REVUE；　the　success　of　the　item　was　unmistakable；　the　

calls　were　so　insistent　and　uproarious　that　even　Lucas'　

ample　devisings　of　additional　〃business〃　scarcely　

sufficed　to　keep　pace　with　the　demand。　　Packed　houses　on　

successive　evenings　confirmed　the　verdict　of　the　first　

night　audience；　stalls　and　boxes　filled　significantly　

just　before　the　turn　came　on；　and　emptied　significantly　

after　the　last　ENCORE　had　been　given。　　The　manager　

tearfully　acknowledged　that　Cousin　Teresa　was　It。　　Stage　

hands　and　supers　and　programme　sellers　acknowledged　it　to　

one　another　without　the　least　reservation。　　The　name　of　

the　REVUE　dwindled　to　secondary　importance；　and　vast　

letters　of　electric　blue　blazoned　the　words　〃Cousin　

Teresa〃　from　the　front　of　the　great　palace　of　pleasure。　　

And；　of　course；　the　magic　of　the　famous　refrain　laid　its　

spell　all　over　the　Metropolis。　　Restaurant　proprietors　

were　obliged　to　provide　the　members　of　their　orchestras　

with　painted　wooden　dogs　on　wheels；　in　order　that