applied a poultice to his head； declaring； that he had no fever；
nor any other bad symptom but the loss of speech； if he really
had lost that faculty。 But the young 'squire said this
practitioner was an ignorantaccio； that there was a fracture in
the cranium； and that there was a necessity for having him
trepanned without loss of time。 His mother； espousing this
opinion； had sent an express to York for a surgeon to perform the
operation； and he was already come with his 'prentice and
instruments。 Having examined the patient's head； he began to
prepare his dressings； though Grieve still retained his first
opinion that there was no fracture； and was the more confirmed in
it as the 'squire had passed the night in profound sleep；
uninterrupted by any catching or convulsion。 The York surgeon
said he could not tell whether there was a fracture； until he
should take off the scalp； but； at any rate； the operation might
be of service in giving vent to any blood that might be
extravasated； either above or below the dura mater。 The lady and
her son were clear for trying the experiment； and Grieve was
dismissed with some marks of contempt； which； perhaps； he owed to
the plainness of his appearance。 He seemed to be about the middle
age； wore his own black hair without any sort of dressing； by his
garb； one would have taken him for a quaker； but he had none of
the stiffness of that sect； on the contrary he was very
submissive； respectful； and remarkably taciturn。
Leaving the ladies in an apartment by themselves； we adjourned to
the patient's chamber； where the dressings and instruments were
displayed in order upon a pewter dish。 The operator； laying aside
his coat and periwig； equipped himself with a night…cap； apron；
and sleeves； while his 'prentice and footman； seizing the
'squire's head； began to place it in a proper posture。 But mark
what followed。 The patient； bolting upright in the bed； collared
each of these assistants with the grasp of Hercules； exclaiming；
in a bellowing tone； 'I ha'n't lived so long in Yorkshire to be
trepanned by such vermin as you；' and leaping on the floor； put
on his breeches quietly； to the astonishment of us all。 The
Surgeon still insisted upon the operation； alleging it was now
plain that the brain was injured； and desiring the servants put
him into bed again； but nobody would venture to execute his
orders； or even to interpose： when the 'squire turned him and his
assistants out of doors； and threw his apparatus out at the
window。 Having thus asserted his prerogative； and put on his
cloaths with the help of a valet； the count； with my nephew and
me； were introduced by his son； and received with his usual stile
of rustic civility； then turning to signor Macaroni； with a
sarcastic grin； 'I tell thee what； Dick （said he）； a man's scull
is not to be bored every time his head is broken； and I'll
convince thee and thy mother； that I know as many tricks as e'er
an old fox in the West Riding。'
We afterwards understood he had quarrelled at a public house with
an exciseman； whom he challenged to a bout at single stick； in
which he had been worsted； and that the shame of this defeat had
tied up his tongue。 As for madam； she had shewn no concern for
his disaster； and now heard of his recovery without emotion She
had taken some little notice of my sister and niece； though
rather with a view to indulge her own petulance； than out of any
sentiment of regard to our family。 She said Liddy was a fright；
and ordered her woman to adjust her head before dinner； but she
would not meddle with Tabby； whose spirit； she soon perceived；
was not to be irritated with impunity。 At table； she acknowledged
me so far as to say she had heard of my father； though she
hinted； that he had disobliged her family by making a poor match
in Wales。 She was disagreeably familiar in her enquiries about
our circumstances； and asked； if I intended to bring up my nephew
to the law。 I told her； that； as he had an independent fortune；
he should follow no profession but that of a country gentleman；
and that I was not without hopes of procuring for him a seat in
parliament 'Pray cousin （said she）； what may his fortune be？'
When I answered； that； with what I should be able to give him； he
would have better than two thousand a year； she replied； with a
disdainful toss of her head； that it would be impossible for him
to preserve his independence on such a paultry provision。
Not a little nettled at this arrogant remark； I told her； I had
the honour to sit in parliament with her father； when he had
little more than half that income； and I believed there was not a
more independent and incorruptible member in the house。 'Ay； but
times are changed （cried the 'squire） Country gentlemen now…a…days
live after another fashion。 My table alone stands me in a
cool thousand a quarter； though I raise my own stock； import my
own liquors； and have every thing at the first hand。 True it
is； I keep open house； and receive all corners； for the honour of
Old England。' 'If that be the case （said I）； 'tis a wonder you
can maintain it at so small an expence； but every private
gentleman is not expected to keep a caravanserai for the
accommodation of travellers： indeed； if every individual lived in
the same stile； you would not have such a number of guests at
your table； of consequence your hospitality would not shine so
bright for the glory of the West Riding。' The young 'squire；
tickled by this ironical observation； exclaimed； 'O che burla！'
his mother eyed me in silence with a supercilious air； and the
father of the feast； taking a bumper of October； 'My service to
you； cousin Bramble （said he）； I have always heard there was
something keen and biting in the air of the Welch mountains。'
I was much pleased with the count de Melville； who is sensible；
easy； and polite； and the countess is the most amiable woman I
ever beheld。 In the afternoon they took leave of their
entertainers； and the young gentleman； mounting his horse；
undertook to conduct their coach through the park； while one of
their servants rode round to give notice to the rest； whom they
had left at a public house on the road。 The moment their backs
were turned； the censorious daemon took possession of our
Yorkshire landlady and our sister Tabitha The former observed；
that the countess was a good sort of a body； but totally ignorant
of good breeding； consequently aukward in her address。 The squire
said； he did not pretend to the breeding of any thing but colts；
but that the jade would be very handsome； if she was a little
more in flesh。 'Handsome！ （cried Tabby） she has indeed a pair of
black eyes without any meaning； but then there is not a good
feature in her face。' 'I know not what you call good features in
Wales （replied our landlord）； but they'll pass in Yorkshire。'
Then turning to Liddy； he added； 'What say you； my pretty
Redstreak？ what is your opinion of the countess？' 'I think
（cried Liddy； with great emotion）； she's an angel。' Tabby chid
her for talking with such freedom in company； and the lady of the
house said； in a contemptuous tone； she supposed miss had been
brought up at some country boarding…school。
Our conversation was suddenly interrupted by the young gentleman；
who galloped into the yard all aghast； exclaiming； that the coach
was attacked by a great number of highwaymen。 My nephew and I
rushed out； found his own and his servant's horse ready saddled
in the stable； with pistols in the caps We mounted instantly；
ordering Clinker and Dutton to follow with all possible
expedition； but notwithstanding all the speed we could make； the
action was over before we arrived； and the count with his lady；
safe lodged at the house of Grieve； who had signalized himself
in a very remarkable manner on this occasion。 At the turning of
a lane； that led to the village where the count's servants
remained； a couple of robbers a…horseback suddenly appeared； with
their pistols advanced： one kept the coachman in awe； and the
other demanded the count's money； while the young 'squire went
off at full speed； without ever casting a look behind。 The count
desiring the thief to withdraw his pistol； as the lady was in
great terror； delivered his purse without making the least
resistance； but not satisfied with this booty； which was pretty
considerable； the rascal insisted upon rifling her of her car…rings
and necklace； and the countess screamed with affright。 Her
husband； exasperated at the violence with which she was
threatened； wrested the pistol out of the fellow's hand； and
turning it upon him； snapped it in his face； but the robber
knowing there was no charge in it； drew another from his bosom；
and in all probability would have killed him on the spot； had not
his life been saved by a wonderful interposition。 Grieve； the
apothecary； chancing to pass that very instant； ran up to the
coach； and with a crab…stick； which was all the weapon he had；
brought the fellow to the ground with the first blow； then
seizing his pistol； presented it at his colleague； who fired his
piece at random； and fled without further opposition。 The other
was secured by the assistance of the count and the coachman； and
his legs being tied under the belly of his own horse； Grieve
conducted him to the village； whither also the carriage
proceeded。 It was with great difficulty the countess could be
kept from swooning； but at last she was happily conveyed to the
house of the apothecary； who went into the shop to prepare some
drops for her； while his wife and daughter administered to her in
another apartment。
I found the count standing in the kitchen with the parson of the
parish； and expressing much impatience to see his protector； whom
as yet he had scarce found time to thank for the essential
service he had done him and the countess。 The daughter passing
at the same time with a glass of water； monsieur de Melville
could not help taking notice of her figure； which was strikingly
engaging。 'Ay （said the parson）； she is the prettiest girl； and
the best girl in all my parish： and if I could give my son an
estate of ten thousand a year； he should have my consent to lay
it at her feet。 If Mr Grieve